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Phyllis Jean Green

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· Carrboro Poetica

· Above and Below

· Spinning Straw: the Jeff Apple Story

Short Stories
· Scrawny Kid Clerked at Thrifty

· Euceless Laughs, Y O U Laugh {Capice?}

· This is Your Lucky Day by Euceless Liesalot

· Christmas Fax for da Broads in da Audience

· Flashing

· Owner Will Repair Kitchen Floor {flash humor}

· Courting Able

· Amnesty International Pressing for More Anti-Rape Legislation

· Bullying has no Place in a Democracy

· Calling Dr. Mengele, Calling Dr. Mengele

· Show and Tell by Karen Vanderlaan - Review

· Valley of the Shadow by Sybil Austin Skakle - Review

· Courage in Patience by Beth Fehlbaum -- a Review

· Heart Attack Symptoms Differ for Men and Women -- Read and Share!

· If you Have Been Kidnapped or Abducted --A Letter from Someone who Cares

· RICO for Kids - Help Missing Children, U.S.A.

· Reason to Celebrate! {re O N E's impact re suffering in Africa}

· Listen to Your Muse, Then get up an' do Your Thing

· Poem an Inside Job

· Vicks, Flannel, and Great Expectations?

· Rumor January 19, two Thousand Thirteen

· Snow Night with Bird

· Gunned Down

· Shape Shifter

· Fought Tooth and Nail, I Know You {for Ellie}

· Night-Light

· We are Here to Tell You

         More poetry...
· Featured in Creative Thinkers International!

· Second Appearance in Leann Marshall's Sketch Notes

· New Appearance in The Yarn Spinner

· Bullying has no Place in a Democracy Featured at Creative Thinkers Intnl

· Poem to Appear in Sketchbook

· Poems to Appear in Sensations' 21st Century Issue

· In Richard Lee King's The Price of Freedom

Phyllis Jean Green, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

...jokes for itself?...

~ Two and two used to be four. Then they went on
the Jerry Springer show.  Now it's,
"You did it with. . .HOW MANY~?!?"

~ Candy is bad. So is breathing.

~ The greener a vegetable is, the better it is for    you.  
  The greener a vegetable is, the harder it stares.
   The greener a vegetable is, the prettier it will   make you.
    The greener a vegetable is, the more it deserves to be shared.
     I am going to share mine with you. (Feel pretty yet?  Green??)

~ Jesus didnít say much. He was too busy promoting Peace, Love, and Forgiveness. Old
Testament didnít, so O. T. lovers tortured and
killed him.  Then they tracked down his followers.
A few lucky sods escaped.   Naturally, they
had to come out of hiding to hunt for eats. Jesus had said not to steal, so they disguised themselves
and went job-hunting. All the bosses turned out
to be Old Testament types.    Do the math.

~ One thing about having Halfheimers, you donít have to. . .what ?

~ Most Americans made New Yearís resolutions. Can we help it if we have Halfheimers?

~ Authors get famous and end up with yachts and movie contracts. Read the sentence that follows "resolutions."

~ What?

~ Make-up doesnít work as well as it used to.

~ The devil invented "exact same."

~ S/he did it on the exact same day that she made it impossible not to say "bottom line."

~ Parse the sentence, "S/he bit hi/r tongue." Now tell me why we donít switch to non-sexist pronouns. Got nothing to do with comprehension,
thatís for sure.

~ Remind me what "parse" means.

~ Add "whom" to "exact same." [Not every whom,  dummy. Just those irritating ones that are only found in books.  Who says "With whom did you go?"  I will tell you who.   Someone who don' have a Who to hang with!]

~ Whenever possible, a sentence should end in a preposition.
   Uh, oh.
  Make that, Whenever possible, a sentence is something that a preposition should end at the end of.

~ Something like that.

~ Clowns and jesters are looked down upon. So
are policew/men, firefighters, nurses, people who
shovel up messes that would kill us if allowed to
Pile High and Deep, artists [especially poets],
teachers, farmworkers, 'cet.  If you cook or sew
or fix or mend or build or make the mistake of
caring for children. . .get the idea?

~ At least Martha Stewart worked. Enron execs andtheir ilk. . .never mind. Donít want to sully my keys.

~ Think I wonít do this again, youíre wrong.

~ Unless my Halfheimerís gets wor--. . .what??


(c) Phyllis Jean Green
(c) Peajay Gee
                 January, 2005


Web Site The Moonwort Review

Reader Reviews for "Facts, Facts, Facts, Mr. Micawber"

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Reviewed by Debra Conklin 1/6/2005
Smiling on my way out the door to find some make-up that really will make me up to look like I did at twenty.
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 1/4/2005
Now this is a mouthful!!

Thanks for sharing 1+1=Many!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by Judy Lloyd (Reader) 1/4/2005
Okay this is funny and I like your style.

Books by
Phyllis Jean Green

Carrboro Poetica

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Signed copy!

Above and Below

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Signed copy!

Spinning Straw: the Jeff Apple Story

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Signed copy!

Humor Articles
  1. Calling Dr. Mengele, Calling Dr. Mengele
  2. Rodney Dangerfield
  3. Merry Atheistmas
  4. Conniving My Retirement
  5. Stuff I Just Donít Get On Facebook
  6. Lost C. Burnett Skit
  7. Hi it's me, the grouchy ladybug
  8. J. Carson as R. Reagan
  9. 2014 and 2015
  10. New Cleaner for Kason
  11. The 2000 Year Old Man
  12. Ultimate Sexy
  13. My colonoscopy 3/20/14 Ė I have to tell yo
  14. Ponderisms
  15. Time for Confusion
  16. The Toilet Seat Delima
  17. It's the Old Spice Guy: Look at Him, Now L
  18. Playing With The Telephone
  19. More Ponderisms
  20. International Talk Like William Shatner Da

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