The Last Winter
D. S. Mullis
Copyright(at)2009
Annie sat on her porch swing watching the moon slowly rise over the gentle waves.
Her caregiver was busy in the kitchen cleaning up after their scrumptious meal.
The full moon always seemed to give the ocean a romantic effect, Annie surmised
to herself. Then she thought, “Where did romance go? Better yet, where did life go?”
It seemed like only yesterday, Annie reminisced, that she was a child playing in the dirt in her parent’s backyard, innocent of life’s adventures or heartaches.
Annie grew up during the Great Depression, so her childhood was meager at best.
Yet love flowed and life was bearable. On many occasions she did not understand the whys and wherefores of events in her life but she accepted life as it came and went.
Life had not been fair at times but all in all it had been good—as good as it could be, she concluded. The wonderful thing was that she had no regrets.
Annie reflected upon her past nowadays, especially when the moon was full. She enjoyed the opportunity to sit on her porch swing nightly during the week it was full. If for no other reason, she did it to reminisce. This time of year, though, she had to not only have on her fleece pajamas and robe but a warm blanket to throw over her as well. The night air made the cold temperatures even colder, but the view made the effort worthwhile.
One of the advantages here in her older days was the ocean. She had begun to feel like an old woman and the sea, in light of her relationship with the moon as it shone nightly to her over the dark rolling waters.
In days gone by, she walked the beach when the moon was full and was always enthralled at how its light was always where she was. The stars were too numerous to count but Annie had picked out one that she always looked for that she had named, but she had forgotten where it was now and its name.
She learned many things that had never concerned her before she moved to the beach. Like, how often the tide changed, how different the tide was during full moon, how the sound of the waves crashing on the jetties’ rocks made one feel so serene even though the sound was tempestuous at times. For sure, the beach had become her mainstay. She felt herself almost to the point of becoming a recluse, except for the presence of her caregiver. Writing had been an integral part of her life, but was fading now due to the lack of her ability to concentrate. Forgetfulness was coming more into play and that was why she kept struggling to remember.
Annie thought back to the days when life began to unfold for her.
As chance would have it, or so some would infer, it was love at first sight. He was the epitome of a righteous man in the midst of unrighteous times.
Annie never concluded that chance or fate had a hand in their meeting, but rather this had been a planned connection from above.
He was a military man, staunch, ruddy, and rarely with a smile; except when he was with her. She herself was a part of the WACS, so military influence was hers as well.
The night they met the fire began to burn and never went out. As she mused to herself on this particular night, she could not recall a time that the thought of him didn’t bring a smile to her face. Her heart began to pound with just the vision of him in her mind’s eye. And each time she had the opportunity to see their only son, the reality of what they shared surfaced because the son looked just like his dad.
Then her mind raced to the dreadful night his commanding officer knocked on her door to tell her that the love of her life had been killed when the USS Wasp had been torpedoed.
Annie was devastated, collapsed at her doorway, and from that day was never the same. She never loved again with the capacity that she did this one righteous man.
Life continued for Annie in spite of the loss. She did marry again later in life, but not for love—for money.
She met a man who was ‘filthy rich’ as many folks termed it, and he fell madly in love with her. He was older than she was, and spared no expense in winning her hand to himself. When he died, he left all his riches to her. How else could she afford to live where she did now, she pondered.
Annie smiled to herself at this thought, and realized that she could not remember the names of either of the two men who had been integral parts of her past. She could not remember her own son’s name at this point either.
In days gone by, it would have troubled her to no end not to be able to grasp their names. Their faces were etched in the pages of her mind, but the names had escaped at some point in time.
About that time, her caregiver walked out on the porch and Annie invited her to sit in the swing with her.
Annie took her by the hand and began to cry. She told her caregiver that her life seemed like a maze of sorts. Her caregiver put her arms around Annie and rocked her in the swing. As they sat there together, the caregiver began to quote a poem that was very relevant to Annie. She had quoted it before to Annie, but naturally Annie did not remember it. Annie smiled and nodded her head as the caregiver spoke these words. It went like this:
WHO ME? - FORGET?
‘Where are those keys? My glasses, too?’
Yes, as she spoke, she had no clue
What could have happened, for you see,
Forgetfulness has come to be
A way of life for her these days.
‘My life now daily is a maze!’
She uttered slowly as she cried-
With diligence she searched inside
Herself, and pondered how it was
Her life had now become a cause!
For those who loved her would no doubt
Make haste to turn her inside out,
With questions difficult to solve,
And answers that would soon evolve
Would make no sense, for reason now
A thing of past, replaced somehow
By folly, yes and unconcern-
This one who once did steady yearn
To be abreast of all her deeds,
Now full of constant, daily needs-
While she is not at times aware
Of her surroundings, yes, no care,
Just living life within a shell.
The end? For sure no one can tell.
How soon?—How long will this trek last?
Alzheimer’s victim! Only past
Events from time to time arise-
Then, with a glimmer in her eyes,
She smiles and nods her head in jest,
A vague remembrance of the best
That life afforded - now is gone,
And in the end, she’ll be alone!
The loved ones, though they’re loved for sure,
Will fade from view because no cure
Can bring her back to life she knew,
God only knows the future view
Will lie within eternal bliss,
What He’s prepared surpasses this
That finally will slip away,
And in its place, a brand new day-
ETERNITY!
As Annie listened intently to the poem, she stared out over the ocean’s waves that seemed to call her name. In the far distance of the moon’s glow, she saw a faint shadow that appeared to be walking on the water. She leaned forward, pulling away from her caregiver’s embrace. Her eyes were fixed upon the shadow that only she could see lurking on the waters.
Annie smiled, and waved continuously at the shadow.
Her caregiver asked her what was she doing, was there anything wrong.
Annie turned to her caregiver and stated very softly that she was about to embark upon her brand new day. With that statement, Annie’s last winter ended and eternity began!
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