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Mark M Lichterman

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Accepting Old Age With Humor
By Mark M Lichterman
Last edited: Thursday, December 25, 2008
Posted: Monday, December 22, 2008



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Mark M Lichterman

• A Jewish Boycott
• Betrayal in Benghazi
• Did You Know?
• The 2000 Year Old Man
• Social Security History
• Lost C. Burnett Skit
• THE CANDY BOMBER
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I am a healthy, though about twenty pounds overweight, man that still has all my hair... Well, almost all my hair that has become sprinkled with gray... Well, maybe a bit more than just “sprinkled with gray” that I actually like.

            ACCEPTING OLD AGE WITH HUMOR 

Okay, so I’m eight months between my seventy-fourth and  seventy-fifth birthday and what, I ask you, what's the alternative?

 

I am a healthy, though about twenty pounds overweight, man that still has all my hair... Well, almost all my hair that has become sprinkled with gray... Well, maybe a bit more than just “sprinkled with gray” that I actually like.

 

People meeting me never take me for my age thinking I’m... “Oh, my God!” they would say, “You can’t be older than fifty/fifty-five, possibly, sixty at the most!”

 

Which, of course, always tickles the hell out of me.

 

And – thanks to my inherited genes – it’s true .

 

I stopped smoking about thirty-six years ago, and ride a bike about eleven miles a day five days a week and still work a couple of days a week and... And this helps a lot, a real lot! I have a girlfriend that’s ten years younger than me.

 

My girlfriend happens to be my next door neighbor who happens to still be a “chick”... Well, if one can call a sixty-four old woman a “chick” or, for that matter, a “girl”. However, to me she is a beautiful, sexy, lovable woman that...  

 

Geriatric sex will be another, I’m sure, unbelievably interesting article.

 

Anyway, outside of two, to say the least, annoying symptoms of approaching – approaching? – old age  I feel really swell!

 

“Swell!” For you whippersnappers, “swell” is a word from the past meaning, “Great!” "Swell came along long before "cool". And I do! I do feel swell except for two annoying symptoms.

 

One of those annoying symptoms is I've always got to “go”... Which sometimes becomes annoying on my bike rides.

 

The second: I forget what the hell I’m talking about, sometimes in mid-sentence.

 

Consequently, I have become a huge buyer of “Post-its” and have them stuck in various places in my home to remind me of various things that I am to do... or have to do.

 

In my bathroom, on the wall over the toilet, I have two post-its to remind me what I’m there to "do".  

 

The post-its stuck on the wall over the toilet are there to remind me if I’m there to – although I use two other words –  urinate or defecate. However, what I can’t figure out is, why are clothes hanging from bars along the walls and shoes on the floor?

 

f

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Reviewed by Marcia Miller-Twiford
We're just about the same age Mark and I love it. With the wisdom comes the wrinkles and with the trials and tribulations comes the strength. Keep the post-its handy and keep on peddling. You need to stay around for a long, long time to bring us the pleasure of your pen. My SO is younger than myself and he thinks I'm the best thing to come along since Grey Goose vodka became so as poplular. Keep up the good work and happy writing. I'd like to see an article from you on how you quit smoking. My website keeps me very busy and I don't get to visit here as often and I'd like to so I'll apprecite it if you let me know. Keep your golden pen close. You're amongst the very best.
Reviewed by m j hollingshead
well said
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