edited: Tuesday, January 16, 2007
By Tova Gabrielle
Not "rated" by the Author.
Posted: Tuesday, January 16, 2007
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Two or three times before the presences,
I was awoken by my own voice
pranced and danced
spirits of rivers
babbling through my own lips
Then I knew what it meant
to be speaking in tongues.
During the day and always at night
I felt a physical pressure to let
the sounds out
I toyed with allowing the sounds,
the impulse was so strong,
not quite dismayed, more than baffled.
One time I was playing with my son and the sounds emerged.
I stopped them, terribly worried it would frighten him,
but he didn't seem to notice anything
out of control
Someone I once met
would sit up in bed and start
making (what turned out to be)
in his sleep
His wife started recording them.
I had no desire to speak in tongues.
I mostly wanted to
finish my book.
After that, I would regularly wake up with a startled gasp
at someone in my room,
there was no one there.
Time passed, over the weeks, I would awake with a start, the presence closing in,
someone whispering to me,
one time I heard it, right in my ear
like a lover.
again, I awoke and saw no one there.
I started thinking
and thinking about spirits
weighing the pros and cons of listening when someone was so obviously trying to communicate with me. I did not think I was loosing my mind. It was too actual an experience, too real. Not like a dream.
OK, if its benign.
OK, Ill tolerate it, I am willing though afraid, to find out what it wants,
...as long as its benign.
At around 11pm on March 5th, 2000, I awoke with a terrified start
I opened my eyes
to something very much there
towering over me right at my bedside
near chest level.
I simply looked, I had prepared
I forced myself
not to react but witness
a dome-shaped tall presence,
all silvery whiteness
no features just
right up against
the side of my bed near my heart
I somehow was able to allow it
to be there and be there myself
without the fear
but i could not sustain it
maybe it was a minute i looked
in frozen but forced awareness
or maybe it was ten seconds
That is all I remember.
The next day I said to my mother,
I dont know what it was,
But if I Ever thought I was all alone
In a hostile world,
I can think it no more.