Anopther e-mail to the boss
To: Mr TE McBride CEO
From: Capt. A Hall
April 10 2002
Dear Mr McBride,
Thank you for your memo, which I read on my return from Malaga.
I can readily see how my remark about the ‘Old Buzzard’ might have been open to misinterpretation and I apologise for any offence caused.
I note from your memo that you wish to discuss crew discipline as a matter of some urgency. As applied to the ladies of the Cabin Crew, perhaps the cabin Crew Supervisor could more effectively handle this aspect. I feel that the matter of their alleged dancing on the tables in the lounge bar in the Ramada Hotel in Barcelona is of little significance. There were two Qantas crews also in residence and it would have been difficult to identify our girls as they had their skirts over their heads. I suspect that the elderly gentleman who attempted to climb on the table with them probably just overbalanced. I am sure that neither of our girls actually pushed him and I feel certain that neither girl would ever utter the phrase “dirty old perv”.
With reference to the damage to the ceiling fan in the dining room, I agree that the situation was allowed to get out of hand. My First Officer, as you will be aware, was until recently a serving officer in the Royal Air Force. He was demonstrating an Officers’ Mess tradition known as ‘Stop the Fan’. The procedure, as I understand it, involves climbing on an array of furniture and allowing each passing fan blade to brush the top of the head, applying increasing pressure until the blades finally stop. The major problem arose when I remembered your warning about behaviour and instructed him to desist. He misunderstood my instruction of “Stop that immediately!” and placed his head straight into the path of an advancing blade. I am told that cold water and a mixture of vinegar and bleach is effective at removing blood from carpets.
I trust that the foregoing will set your mind at rest. I try to ensure that my crew endeavours to present a good image of the Company at all times.
Jen, this next bit is NOT for transmission. The old fart will probably try to switch all my schedules and drag me into the office for a ‘personal chat’. Please try to find out from his PA – Myra I think is her name – if he intends to do that.