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Duke LaRance

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Dear Editor....
By Duke LaRance   

Last edited: Thursday, July 10, 2003
Posted: Thursday, July 10, 2003

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Just another poke at the BIA and Gale Norton......

Dear Editor:

I got a hearty chuckle over your lead story of 8-18-02, “REPORT: Indian Trust Losses Overstated”. I can state unequivocally and without fear of contradiction, that my three cents disappeared into the Andersonesque Abyss of the BIA’s fine system of “accounting”. So, if only millions are owned; just how many of those mere millions are being doled out to Ernst & Young for its astute analysis? Hey – Ernst & Young, did you ever find out what happened to my pennies from Heaven?

For years I regularly received a statement from the Turtle Mountain Agency showing a credit of three cents in my favor. Then, a few years ago, the statements began showing a zero balance. I kept waiting for the prize patrol to show up; but apparently, it was belayed by pirates.

It’s not the money – it’s the principle of the thing. I would leave the principal untouched; and party-hearty on the interest.

Hey Gale, “If you’ve got my money, Honey – then I’ll have a dime!!! -- I’ll go out and boy-oh-boy!!! – I’ll have me a time; can I borrow your Cadillac? – leave my clown car behind? – if you can’t find my money, Honey – Sister, spare a dime? (Sorry, ol’ Hank.)

` Yours Truly,

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Reviewed by Jennifer Butler 5/4/2006
Personally, I don't think we should USE Pennies. After all, I, for one, am in no cent. I would be more along the lines of "Shirley, Shirley, he hath Cheneyed a Dick!" (It's an old burning Bush song.)
Reviewed by Darlene Caban 7/11/2003
Just think-- with three cents, you could get a big glass of 'two cents, plain' and still have money left over! :) I sympathize... for years, I had a savings account showing ten cents-- and two years later, those bastards took my dime! Some guy is probably living high off the hog on our collective thirteen cents!

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