You lived a quarter of your life (your childhood years) in the civilian world, then you signed up and began life in the military – a completely different world from where you came from, now you’re done with the military and you must go back to civilian life and start where you left off. This should be easy – right? NOT!
For most soldiers making the transformation into civilian world is extremely hard. Some consider it like a nightmare. Many veterans consider it a bad dream that just won’t stop. So how can you make the transformation a successful one without all the stress, confusion, worries and obstacles getting in your way?
Let me show you how…
The transformation process begins when you realize that you need to change according to your new lifestyle. Change is good and there is no reason to fear it. It is time to change and you need to develop the stamina to do what it takes to improve yourself. Preparing you for change no matter how hard the obstacle of transformation into the civilian world will be. Remember if you believe in yourself anything is possible.
I will show you how to tackle the transformation with full force and come out as a winner. I created 11 steps so you can make a smooth transformation into civilian life. Your mind, body and soul all have to be on the same track, functioning as one or else these steps will not work for you. For example, when you’re in a unit everyone has to look out for each other working together as one. It’s the same for your mind, body, and soul. They have to work as one.
The most important part of these steps is the beginning. You have to have the correct perception of what is going on now and where you will be headed for in the future. I used these 11 steps myself change my outlook on life and I taught myself how to strive for my goals and achieve them and you can too. One of your goals is to transform to the civilian world and succeed at making the transformation and achieving you goals and dreams you have for yourself in the future.
Remember you need to be proud of yourself and all your accomplishments you made in the military. Believing in yourself and loving yourself will give you the strength you need to conquer your goals and help you make a successful transformation.
By following these steps, you will feel like a different and better person. I strongly believe that if you follow these steps it will help you make a smooth transformation, succeed in your live life and have a happy and healthy future in the civilian world.
Below are the seven steps to lead you to a new beginning living in the civilian world…
Endurance: The first step to living a happy and healthy life as a civilian is developing endurance. You need have endurance and inner power to succeed in the transformation to the civilian world. Changing your lifestyle is going to take time, devotion and hard work. Remember, you are in the civilian world now. Life is different and you’re going to have to make many changes. The will to succeed goes a long way.
1. Focus on the positive not the negative: Focus on the possibilities and envision the rewards you will receive from your hard work. No matter what actually happens, choosing this mindset everyday will help you diminish your fear of uncertainty in any type of change you need to tackle.
Be a leader of the pack: Whether you have to take on new responsibilities, learn a new skill, or adapt to a job, change forces choices. Do not just stand there or back away. Each new choice forces you to look at what you want for yourself. Ask yourself, how far are you willing to go to achieve your goal. Do I want to be a leader for a follower? Leaders achieve big rewards and recognitions follows tend to hide in the woodwork even though they do the same amount of work and GET NO ACKNOWLEDGMENT. Do not be a follower be the leader of the pack. That is what you were taught to do in the military. Take those good characteristics you learned in the military and put them to good use.
2. Plot out a strategic plan: Use this time to make a plan for yourself. Every new plan takes a lot of time and work, but if you have a plan you will feel a lot less stress, you know where you want to go, and you will find that the new skill you are trying to learn moves you closer to your dreams. Who said your dreams could not become your reality.
4. Take a good look at yourself in the mirror: No matter what changes you are facing in the life the biggest changes are coming from within yourself. Are you becoming better, angry, or are you seeing hopeful possibilities? Are you becoming set in your ways or difficult or are you venturing out of your comfort zone to try new things? Take a good look at yourself. Change is unavoidable. You will learn your most valuable lessons in life from them. Discover your inner strengths and open your doors for the rest of the world to see them.
Change is priceless. Making changes can cause new opportunities and new successes, but you will never know or have the chance to succeed if you do not try. Who cares if a door closes? You will have plenty of more doors to open up in the future. You cannot fail if you try. Failure is when you stop trying.
In order to change your outlook on life you will have to train yourself not let the past take control of you. If you were at war you make have had some terrible memories (in war perhaps) that haunt you. Do not live in denial. Face you fears, your past, and learn to cope with them and move forward. You may have to get outside help. By living in denial, you will only hurt yourself. Accepting your past, your fears, any negative impacts on your life will helped you overcome them through counseling, writing them down in a journal accepting it as the past, learning techniques to deal with them and then moving on to a brighter future.
I have released much of the anger that I held inside myself, and have focused on other parts of my life; as a result, I have become a stronger person, extremely proud of the person I have become. You need to do the same. It may take time to get to this point. That is why you need to have patience to come to believe you can do anything you put your mind too. Thinking positive thoughts about yourself will help you get a long way in life.
Step 6 teaches you how to recognize all the wonderful things about yourself. Judging other people is very easy. Looking at ourselves honestly, however, is difficult. Sometimes we do not focus on ourselves because we have become so preoccupied focusing on everyone else that we forget number one. This step helps recognize all the good things about you. You will begin to have a more positive outlook on life. First, you need to ask, “What do I have to change about myself? What parts of my life need to be readjusted? What are my strengths? What are my weaknesses?
Before you answer these questions, get yourself a notebook to document your answers to these questions and keep track of your progress. The journal helps you see your characteristics and change the ones you dislike. Look at the positive things about yourself and commend yourself for the accomplishments that you achieved and work on changing the negative characteristics that we all carry within us. Begin the journal by listing all the positive things about yourself on the first page. Make a list that looks like the following.
List 5 of your strengths
Your positive points are the strengths that will take you through life. Start your journal with these positive characteristics about yourself. Seeing your strengths itemized in your daily journal will give you encouragement. Each day as you open this journal, you will be looking at all the good things about yourself that will give you motivation to make this program achieve your highest potential. On the next page, create a list and write down your weaknesses. Make a list that looks as the following. Remember, be honest with yourself and make sure you focus not only on your strengths, but also on your weaknesses. Reviewing our weaknesses can help us see more clearly, what has to be changed in your lives.
List 5 of your weaknesses
On the next page, list 5 goals you want to do this week to change your outlook on life and how you feel about yourself. This will help you gain some insight into what you need to start doing for yourself. Start planning what you want the new you to be like. Each time you accomplish a goal, put a star next to it. Write down the date of when you achieved the goal. Create a list that looks like the following:
Creating the new me
Goal for the Week - List 5 goals for example:
1. August 1st - Wrote a letter to five people I had hurt in the past. Let go of the guilt and negative feelings you have inside. Realize that you cannot change the past and focus on now and what you can do to better your future life in the civilian world.
Then I want you to list 5 long-term goals of what you want to have accomplished and where you want to be in a month’s time. Focus on how you are going to accept yourself and become proud of the person you have become. Focus on how you are going to change the characteristics about yourself that you do not like. Make the list look like the list I have created below:
List 5 goals for the month
Design a page in the beginning of the book called the priority calendar. Ask yourself these questions.
Priority Calendar - What do you regret not having made more time for? List 5 things in your journal.
- If you had more time, what would you do with it? List 5 things in your journal.
- What are the top ten priorities in your life right now? List 5 things in your journal.
- What are your family-related goals? List 5 things in your journal.
- What are your business goals? List 5 things in your journal.
- Where do you want to be at in a year?
- Where do you want to be in 5 years?
In the back of the journal, take a quarter of the notebook and title it your Daily Diary. Dedicate the diary to someone you care about and feel close too, someone who would be proud to see you accepting that you have are changing and becoming a better person – living the life you want to lead. Dedicate the journal to someone, you care about who gives you motivation to want to change for the better. Write about the goals you accomplished and explain how it made you feel to reach them. Write about these achievements are making you into a better person and how their helping you with your transition into the civilian world. Date and describe what you had to do to achieve the goals.
Step 7 is about the importance of self-determination and learning how to develop it. Self-determination requires that you make an agreement with yourself and keep it. You must have faith in yourself that you are going to do anything that you put your mind to. Your motivation to accomplish this program will become easier as each day goes by. Saying you are going to improve is easy, but you cannot just say you are going to improve; you have to get out and accomplish the goals that you have set for yourself. You cannot accomplish too many goals in one day. Changing takes time and as step one says, "You need to have patience.” Try to accomplish one goal a week at first. Maybe two goals, if you have the time. Then accomplish another goal each week until you get to ten goals. These goals do not have to be difficult. You can set several little goals maybe only one large one. Working on yourself can be tough if you have a busy schedule; nevertheless, do not let that stop you. You have to make time for yourself. Remember; you come first in life. You need to believe that you are the best. You cannot take care of the people who mean the most to you or do the things in life that you want to do, if you are mental, physical and spiritual well-being is not intact and strong.
Reward yourself every time you achieve a goal. Your achievements are important and you should not treat them lightly. For example, take in a movie or reward yourself with some quiet time to relax and focus just on yourself. To me there is nothing better than having sometime alone with you. Do something that makes you happy. Remember, you cannot make others happy until you are happy with yourself.
In your journal, make a list called Record of Successes and itemize all the achievements that you have accomplished. Create a list of everything good you believe you have done for yourself. This will make you feel good about yourself. Include the following:
RECORD YOUR SUCCESSES THROUGHOUT YOUR LIFE
Write “My Achievements” - List 5 things.
RECORD YOUR CURRENTSUCCESSES
Write “My Achievements” - List 5 things.
Develop a special time in the day for quiet time. Studies have shown that individuals who have a daily quiet time are less likely to become ill, and heal faster from illness than those who do not. Take a few minutes during the day to write in your journal. Try to make it the same time each day. Perhaps when no one is home or just before you start the day in the morning. You could also wait until everyone goes to sleep so that no one will bother you. Give yourself at least fifteen minutes to a half hour. Relax, and while you are writing and relaxing ask yourself the question; “Where am I headed in life and where do I want to be a year from now?” Then write about it. Make sure you are focusing on the things you want to accomplish in life.
The only way you will succeed and make a successful transition into the civilian world is to feel proud of the changes you are making while you learn to adjust to a new lifestyle in the civilian world. Focus on what you have accomplished. Think about how you feel about making the transition into the civilian world. While writing in this journal. The goal is to let yourself open up and write intimately and honestly about how you feel. This method helps heal your wounds so you can get on with your life. You have to learn to understand why you have reacted the way you have about issues you have had in the past (Ex. Issues from the war). Think of ways to strengthen yourself spiritually and emotionally. Make sure you do not limit yourself because you feel sorry for yourself because you are not where you want to be or because you are not that perfect person you dreamed of becoming. Remember, no one is perfect we all have our quirks. Self-pity is unhealthy. You will never get anywhere in life if you pity yourself. Free yourself from any walls you have built around yourself. These steps will help you become the person you are meant to be in life.
Now repeat the ELEVENTH STEP each day. Once you complete the eleventh step, go back and review the things you have written in your journal. These steps are a new way of life. Keep doing these seven steps each day until you get to where you want to be and you have become completely satisfied with yourself. There is so much knowledge out there for us to learn. It is there for anyone who wants it. I always add more goals to my list. You should always work on bettering yourself. Everyone is special everyone has something unique about them. It is your job to find out what those unique qualities are in you and how to make them work for you. You will succeed in the civilian world and you will become the person you want to become with a little faith, courage, wisdom strength and hope. Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day. Patience is the key and the willingness to succeed will unlock the doors to your dreams and lead you to success.