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Laurie M Conrad

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· We Meet in Dreams, A New Interpretation of Dreams

· Visits With Angels

· Realms of Light: Clairvoyant Experiences of Life After Death

· The Spiritual Life of Animals and Plants

Short Stories
· Still Working on the Musical Score of Glimpses: A Composer's Journal

· Filling in the Sketches for the Flute and Piano Piece : A Composers Journal

· Working on the Dance for “Glimpses”: A Composer’s Journal

· Finding Melodies and Harmonies for 'Glimpses': A Composer's Journal

· Sketching out 'Glimpses' for Flute and Piano: A Composer's Journal

· Starting to Write for Flute and Piano: A Composer's Journal Entry

· Another Story from The Spiritual Life of Animals and Plants

· Story From 'The Spiritual Life of Animals and Plants'

· After the Musical Score is Finished: A Composer's Journal

· Finishing the Musical Score of 'Unsung Songs: Songs of the Earth'

· The Medjugorje Hymn to Our Lady

· Writing the Musical Score: A Composer's Journal

· Our Lady's Newest Message from Medjugorje: A Mystic's Journal

· Copying Out the Music: A Composer's Journal

· Still Writing the 'Unsung Songs' Cycle: A Composer's Journal

· An Interview on Creativity and Mystical States: A Mystic’s Journal

· The Living Rosary : A Mystic’s Journal Entry: November 28, 2010

· Our First and Last Mistake: A Mystic's Journal

· Letting Go of the Past: An Exercise in True Being: A Mystic’s Journal

· The Madonna's Latest Message from Medjugorje: “Be My River of Love”

· 3 Poems for the Flute Piece Glimpses

· The Dancer

· Spring Song

· The Message

· Poems For the Dying

· Unsung Song: The Visit

· Two Songs: 'Sailboats' & 'A Feather'

· Poem: Words to the Song, 'The Storm'

· Poem: The Golden Arrow

· By The Lake

         More poetry...
· See the CD cover for the 'Unsung Songs: Songs of the Earth' Here!

· Listen to my new piece Unsung Songs

· New Amazon Review of We Meet in Dreams

· Epilogue to New Book We Meet in Dreams

· New Book We Meet in Dreams Now Available on Amazon!

· More Reviews of the CDs 'Visions' and 'Images'

· Read the First Newspaper Review of We Meet in Dreams

Laurie M Conrad, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

by Laurie Conrad.

True Confidence: Meditation Class: A Mystic’s Journal Entry: February 8, 2007

Thursday, February 8

The photo included with this entry is of the statue of Our Lady on our fireplace mantle.

Found a message on the Authorsden website, from my friend Marguerite: " Thanks for the prayers. I can feel them way down here in Louisiana. Melanie is feeling the prayers and says thanks and please continue to pray. She lives in Tennessee. Continue to heal and to heal others, FOR THIS I PRAY. Marguerite ‘lil flower."

Trudy said that she had briefly experienced the fragrance of flowers at a piano concert last Saturday night - a whiff of the supernatural. No one was aware of fragrances during class this past Wednesday, but during meditation I got some whiffs of the fruitlike scent we had experienced as we studied the poems of the Desert Fathers last year.

We are continuing our studies of the book The Ways of Mental Prayer (Lehodey; Tan Books and Publishers).

Trudy began reading a few sentences on what Lehodey calls trustful humility and humble confidence. Lehodey writes: Is not man’s greatest infirmity since the fall, pride, that strange compound of presumption and discouragement, of self-sufficiency and diffidence? Under various guises it is always the same evil ...

We found this a valuable passage; we have discussed this topic in class over the years - and we always seem to return to it as new people join class. Most people assume that pride, or "ego" refers only to a self-opinion of greatness and success: i.e. that we think that we are better than others, that we are overbearing, presumptuous, overconfident.

But philosophically speaking, this is not the case. "Pride" or "ego", on the spiritual path, has a very different meaning. Simply stated, on the spiritual path "pride" or "ego" means that we think we are our personal thoughts, thoughts which then lead to our emotions and actions. "Ego" here means thinking that we are the physical body and its thoughts and emotions and actions. Therefore, pride can lead us to call ourselves terrible names and to think badly of ourselves just as easily as it can tell us we are better than others. It is all the same mistake: we forget that we are the soul.

This led to a discussion on how important it is to identify with the soul rather than our personalities, rather than our thoughts and opinions of ourselves and others and the emotions that follow. And to also think of others as the soul. Once we think we are merely the physical body and its thoughts and emotions and others are only what we perceive, then we are caught in that reality, there is no escape: we will either have to defend ourselves, our thoughts and emotions - or judge them as lacking. There can be no steady confidence if we identify with the personality for the simple reason that the personality is not trustworthy; it will make mistakes, it will be lacking in almost every way at various times during our lives and days on earth. Therefore, the only way to achieve the trustful humility and humble confidence that Lehodey suggests is to identify with the soul. Because we are the soul we have a humble confidence and a natural nobility - we are humble before God and the soul, and yet because the soul is our true being we have a natural and humble confidence. We are humble before God and the soul - and yet in the knowledge that we are lacking as a created being, we also know that we are the soul and that we can rely on God. Without this knowledge and attitude we naturally fall into many mistakes, including the mistake of thinking ourselves unworthy before our fellow creatures - which can never be true , for we all are the soul. To think ourselves unworthy while still standing in the ego, while still identifying with the personality, i.e. with our thoughts and emotions, with our physical selves - can lead to nihilism, a sense of non-being. Or it can bring us to the neurotic idea that all others are better than we are, that we are worthless, useless as a human being. Both of these erroneous views are dangerous, destructive, and negate the truth that we are made in the image of God, that we are greater than our names and personalities. If I restrict myself to "Laurie Conrad", to my own human personality - I am falling into the ego, into pride. And if I restrict myself to "Laurie Conrad" and the image I see in the mirror, I will never be pleased with myself, never find this humble confidence that Lehodey speaks of, for the simple reason that as a created being I will always make mistakes and fall into error. That is the human condition.

When the saints speak of their own "worthlessness" and "nothingness", they are speaking of the "worthlessness" all created beings have when standing before God. The great saints can say that they are "worthless", that they are "nothing"only because the saints are already fully and continually identified with the soul. The saints are making a distinction between the personality and the soul: the personality will always be lacking before the soul and God. If we mortals are still standing in the ego and then say that we are "worthless" or any other negative description of ourselves - we are denying that we are the soul and actually insulting the soul and God. And we are still standing in the ego, i.e. prideful. For to be prideful means to forget that we are the soul, to place our trust in our own personal thoughts and emotions.

Trudy then read: Others (some of our miseries) depend in no way upon our will, but are a pure humiliation inherent to our condition as creatures and as men, and there is nothing for it but humbly to accept them: thus accepted, they will glorify God.

This distinction between the personality and the soul is one of the great secrets of the saints, and can lead us all to virtue and sainthood. We all must learn to distinguish between the vehicle we are given when we incarnate on earth and our true selves, the soul. Every created being will face this choice; we all share the same created vehicle and the perceptions it will give us, whether we are human or any other created creature. And when we can begin to see that we all share created vehicles that can blind us from truth, we can begin to feel a Oneness with all other created beings. Our weakness and fears, our mistakes and our sins are of the same essence as those of all other created creatures. From this feeling of Oneness with all other created beings comes true Peace and Understanding, Compassion and Love.

I then asked the class what thus accepted, they will glorify God meant. Trudy answered that if we accept that we are created beings we are already glorifying God, because we would not have existence without God. Our very existence glorifies God. She then said that to accept ourselves as created beings is also a gratefulness, a gratitude: life itself is a great Gift. And that we must trust that our lives have a purpose and that life itself glorifies God.

Web Site Figaro Books

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Reviewed by Marguerite Lemoine 3/1/2007
Trudy statement in last paragraph is true. We are humble before God because we are His creature, created by Him and we are grateful for our life here on earth and particularly Eternal Life; For He inserted a soul at conception and this soul returns to Him at the end of our lives where we will be tried and accepted by Jeaus, or condemned, as to how we lived the Commandments of The Father and the reason that He, Jesus, suffered and died on a Cross,paying the price for sinners so that all who repented could have Eternal Life. This is plenty to be grateful for. Marguerite 'lil flower

Books by
Laurie M Conrad

The Spiritual Life of Animals and Plants

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We Meet in Dreams, A New Interpretation of Dreams

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Kindle, Amazon, more..

Visits With Angels

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Amazon, more..

Realms of Light: Clairvoyant Experiences of Life After Death

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Spirituality Articles
  1. I Belong to You...
  2. The Living Rosary : A Mystic’s Journal En
  3. A excerpt from my new book
  4. Looking to Jesus
  5. New Year Reset
  6. Our First and Last Mistake: A Mystic's Jou
  7. An Alter to the World
  8. The True Nature of Dreams: Shared Dreams
  10. Déjà vu
  11. Extra Oil: All Roads Lead to Rome
  12. Life....Afterlife
  13. Extra Oil: Thou Shalt Not . . .
  14. God Defies Doctors
  15. Hearing and Believing
  17. An Enduring Lesson from Deep Living
  18. Showing Up for Our Great Work
  19. Hermesian Epidemics: Depression, Anxiety,
  20. Extra Oil Update 26: News in World Without

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