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Jill Eisnaugle

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· Simon the Snowman

· Beside Still Waters

· Under Amber Skies

· Coastal Whispers

Short Stories
· Finding Ricky's Voice

· Worries Are Like Small Potatoes

· Five Generations of Women, Five Generations of Strength

· The Adventures of Gillyboat and Flea

· A Mug of Dreams

· The Man in Gray

· Parsley Rabbit Learned a Life Lesson

· All I Want for Christmas....

· The Grand Prize

· The Magic Bunny

· Love Letters for Valentine's Day

· Daddy’s Spirit Keeps Fallen Fathers in Children’s Hearts, Year-Round

· Broadcasting Relationship “Status” (on a shirt)? Is It Funny or Desperate?

· Resurrecting Love at Easter: Is It a Good Idea?

· The X’s & O’s of Love & Romance

· Marriage Proposals by Women: Tips and Is Trend Really for Leap Year Only?

· The “After-Valentine” Valentine’s Day

· Valentine’s Day Gifts: Are Secrets and Surprises Taboo?

· Re-gifting (for the Right Reasons)

· Productivity is Not Always in Black and White

· Life As I Now Know It

· For Susan Bachman – Missing from Pennsylvania

· Soft Light of Solitude

· Budding Relationships

· The Heartfelt Gift

· Her Courage

· Bravest of the Brave

· Our Hearts Are Hurting for Boston

· A Soul of Kindness

· One Day at a Time

         More poetry...
· Poem Requested by WBZ-Boston

· Jill Eisnaugle Scores Third Place in Writer's Weekly Contest

· Jill Eisnaugle Wins Two Hallmark Book Contests

· Featured Author on Five More Minutes With

· Card contest win meaningful for daughter, Jill Eisnaugle, on Father's Day

· Jill Eisnaugle's Hallmark Card to be Sold in Stores

· Jill Featured in Galveston County Daily News for Hallmark News

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Does writing about a failed relationship really ease the pain and is a public online forum the best place to clear the air? For some, it is.




    Recently, I happened to come across a website where disgruntled, depressed or delirious ex-lovers could write obituaries to their failed relationships. My first thought was to smile and laugh a little over some of the letters that had been posted on the site. Then, I began thinking about my own train of thought and belief that writing is the best medicine for getting past our troubled times.

Some of society’s best songs, poems, stories and books came about as the result of the author’s sadness and need to write the sadness as a coping mechanism. Over the years, countless psychologists have expressed how writing down one’s feelings on paper is the best release a person can have.

A 1999 Center for the Advancement of Health study on the positive affects that writing can have on chronically ill patients showed that 47% of surveyed patients who wrote their feelings on paper for 20 minutes per day over the course of three consecutive days showed noted improvement in their overall moods and health over the course of a four month period. The survey also showed that some patients had as much as a 28% average reduction in the severity of their disorders. This study, alone, proves that writing is beneficial in the healing process.

While I, personally, do not feel that a public forum is the proper place for displaying crude or spiteful comments of any nature towards another human being, I do agree, from firsthand experience, that writing one’s feelings of sadness or loss does serve to ease the mind and therefore, I would recommend a notebook or pen to anyone needing a means for comfort. The key, however, is to keep some civility in a break-up or lost situation. If you’re thinking of publicly posting a seething remark about the friend or lover who left you feeling jilted, remember that what goes around often comes around and any negativity you emit may not be as welcomed, if the roles were reversed.

Good luck as you go forward to bigger, brighter and better things!

© 2008 – Jill Eisnaugle. All Rights Reserved.


Jill Eisnaugle is the author of the poetry books, Coastal Whispers and Under Amber Skies. She resides in Texas City, Texas with her family and pets.



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Reader Reviews for "Relationship Obituaries: A New Way to Move Forward?"

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Reviewed by LadyJtalks LadyJzTalkZone (Reader) 3/1/2008
There has actually been a wall online for as many years as I've been out here so I don't know when it started but it was put up for abuse survivors to write/send letters meant for their abusers. Though the abusers will most likely never see them, the healing for the others who come to read and then write their own is amazing.

A lot of healing in just seeing that others felt the same way and that voicing those feelings didn't send bolts of lighting down to kill them in their place as many who were abused where told that horror would be bestowed on them and their family.

So I have no doubt that it would work in any other area. Just because we feel something doesn't mean that those first feelings are what we carry the rest of our lives, they are only the beginnings of the defensive part of us that helps us through the first hurts. Lady J
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 2/29/2008

When my mother died (nearly 18 years ago), I was angry: bitter because she was too young (I thought) to die (59 years old). Didn't cry for six months. Was watching an Oprah Winfrey program, the guest speaker said to write a letter to your dead loved one - I'm like, "WHAT???? They're never going to read it." The woman (can't remember her name) said that you could say anything - ANYTHING - expressing sadness, anger, happy memories, whatever - thought about it - started a letter and it wound up being 12 pages in length - I cried for three days straight - sometimes writing is the way to release your emotions, to let go - to heal. I know my poetry has been a lifesaver - keep writing, okay? Excellent, thought provoking write -

(((HUGS))), love and prayer, Karla.
Reviewed by Felix Perry 2/29/2008
Yes Jill, I have to agree about writiing being one of the most powerful tools in self healing the pain of heartaches and breakups. We do not need to be bitter and angry but we can express our pain and sadness and that goes a long way to help the healing process so we can move forward in our lives again.

Books by
Jill Eisnaugle

Simon the Snowman

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Beside Still Waters

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Under Amber Skies

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Coastal Whispers

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