If you suspect your spouse or significant other of cheating on you, Christmas is a good time to confirm what you suspect. A cheater can be exposed by the Christmas gift he or she gives, or by the gift he or she receives.
If you know what to look for before or shortly after Christmas, you can find tangible evidence of an affair. Be alert for the following gift-related telltale signs:
1. A suspicious amount of money withdrawn from a bank account.
If a substantial sum of money is withdrawn from one of your joint bank accounts without your knowledge or consent, an alarm should go off in your head. Especially if the missing funds exceed the amount of money your spouse or significant other usually spends at Christmas time.
2. Unusual or unexplained ATM withdrawals.
Many cheating men or women husbands think they can escape detection if they pay for their lover’s gift with cash instead of a credit or debit card. But even cash has to come from somewhere. People tend to forget that ATM transactions also leave a paper trail. The information on those ATM withdrawal slips may hold important clues. Look closely at the date, time, and amount of money indicated on the slip. Also take note of the location of the ATM machine from which the money was withdrawn.
3. Credit card statements that show unusual charges made at jewelry stores, boutiques, or at men’s or women’s specialty stores.
Are there charges on your credit card statement for gift items like lingerie from Victoria's Secret, or jewelry from Tiffany's? If you, or another female in the family didn’t receive these gifts for Christmas, who did he give them to? Does her credit card statement show purchases from expensive men’s clothing stores? Who did she buy these items for, if she didn’t give them to you?
4. Receipts for gift items that you didn't personally receive.
The same thing applies to actual store receipts. If you didn't get the items in question, who were they given to? If you’ve ruled out other members of the family, someone has some explaining to do?
5. Duplicate gifts.
A receipt for the purchase of two identical gifts is a dead giveaway, as are actual duplicate gifts themselves. But many cheaters try to simplify their Christmas shopping by purchasing identical gifts for their lover and their spouse. Find out who the other gift is for.
6. Giving or receiving Christmas gifts of a personal nature to or from a member of the opposite sex. Certain gifts go far beyond what someone would normally give a person who's merely a casual friend. Intimate apparel, or items of clothing that require intimate knowledge of a person's measurements or size. For example – someone other than a family member gives your husband or boyfriend silk boxer shorts, or a dress shirt that requires knowledge of his neck and sleeve size. Or your wife receives lingerie, undergarments or sleepwear, from a male friend.
7. Giving or receiving a disproportionately expensive Christmas gift from someone of the opposite sex. There are limits to the amount of money a person would normally spend on a gift for a business acquaintance or a casual friend. If someone other than you gives your wife a fur coat, or diamond earrings, or your husband receives golf clubs or a laptop computer -- there's more to that relationship than meets the eye. If they try to pass off this gift as an item they purchased for themselves, ask to see the credit card statement or sales receipt.
8. The Case of the Disappearing Gift.. This is the most common scenario that I hear about at Christmastime. A hidden gift is discovered and the person who found it assumes it’s for him or her. They say nothing about their discovery, so as not to spoil the surprise. But Christmas comes and goes, the gift disappears, and it isn’t given to them. Now they’re left wondering who the mystery gift was given to.
Your Marriage May Be at Stake
These gift-related telltale signs are not ironclad indications of infidelity. But if your spouse or significant other has given you reason to suspect they’re having an affair, the gift-related signs you find at Christmastime can give you valuable clues about what’s going on. Suspicious or unusual behavior involving the giving or receiving of Christmas gifts may help you fill in the blanks. So don’t be so quick to dismiss these things as being insignificant. At the very least, these telltale signs will alert you to the possibility that your marriage or relationship may be at stake.
There Are Probably Other Signs
Realize that any gift-related signs you find during the Christmas season are merely the tip of the infidelity iceberg. Signs of infidelity never appear in isolation. Where there’s one sign, there are usually dozens of collaborating signs just waiting to be found. Since most of them will be subtle, knowing what to look for is the key.
Educate Yourself about Infidelity
That’s why your personal library should contain a good infidelity reference book. You can benefit just as much from a good infidelity reference book, as you can from a good medical reference book. Knowing how to spot signs or symptoms that could be fatal to your marriage relationship, is as important as knowing how to spot symptoms that could be fatal to your health. In both cases, survival depends on early detection. For a free tip sheet with details on the 21 major categories of infidelity signs, e-mail InfidelityInfo.gmail.com with 21 Categories- ad in the subject line. Or visit www.FreeInfidelityTipSheets.com
About Ruth Houston:
Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the founder of www.InfidelityAdvice.com and the author of Is He Cheating on You?-829 Telltale Signs, which documents practically every known sign of infidelity, including the subtle signs people usually overlook.
Frequently called on by the media to comment on infidelity issues in the news, Ruth has been quoted in USA Today, the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Los Angeles Times, FoxNews.com, ABCNews.com, msnbc.com, Maclean's, Cosmopolitan and numerous other print and online media worldwide .
Ruth has been a guest on The Today Show, CNN, Fox News, Good Morning America, ABC News, NBC News, 1010WINS, Sirius Satellite Radio, Court TV Radio, BBC, CBC and over 480 other radio and TV shows in the United States, Canada, Europe, South America, New Zealand, Australia, Africa and the Caribbean.
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