"My husband told me that he wanted more space...so I locked him out of the house." Roseanne Barr
If we sent a man to the moon...why can't we send them all?
I miss my husband...but my aim is getting better!
I love a man with dishpan hands.
I got a cat for my husband, and I think that was a fair trade.
"Men are creatures with eight hands." Jane Mansfield
I'm the boss of this household, and I have my wife's permission to say so!
If husbands would treat their wives like a thorughbreds...they wouldn't turn into an old nag!
HUSBAND FOR SALE; Remote included!
"Marriage is a mistake everyone should make." George Jessel
Man is the king of his castle...that is...until his Queen comes home.
The perfect wife, is the one, who doesn't expect a perfect husband.
HUSBAND AND DOG MISSING! Will pay a reward of 25 cents for the dog!
"Perhaps, the best way to get most husbands to do something, is to suggest that they're to old to do it." Author unknown
My husband wears the pants in this family...I just tell him which ones to wear.
The opinions expressed by the husband...are not, necessarily, the opinions of the management.
Hang on to your husband...he might just come back into fashion.
"The husband who wants to be happy, should learn to keep his mouth shut...and his checkbook open." Groucho Marx
I swear...my next husband WILL be normal...
"My husband and I are getting a divorce over religious matters. He thought he was God...and I
didn't." Patricia Mason
I sometimes wake up grumpy...but most of the time, I just let him sleep in.
My husband said, that if I went shopping...he would leave me. Why didn't somebody tell me it was that easy?
"My husband and I have found a really good way of cleaning the house...neither one of us does it." Dottie Archibald
Give your husband an inch...and he'll think he's a ruler.
BEWARE OF DOG! Oh...no...no...no...wait...that's just my husband...wait...
"Somewhere deep down inside of me...there is a decent man inside of me,,,but can't be found." Eminem
"I guess the only way to stop divorce...is to stop marriage." Will Rogers
"I know nothing about sex...because I was always married." Zsa Zsa Gabor
"Whenever I date this guy...I think this guy is a man I want my children to spend their week-ends with." Cher
Anyone looking for a husband...obviously has never had one.
A husband is a person, who takes out the trash...and give the impression that he's cleaned the whole house.
A husband is a lover that pushed his luck too far!
And...I'll leave you with this...
A husband is living proof, that a wife can take a practical joke.
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Copyright; 2011; Jerry Aragon; The Humor Doctor;