AuthorsDen.com  Join Free! | Login 

 
Happy 4th of July!
   Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!

Signed Bookstore | Authors | eBooks | Books | Stories | Articles | Poetry | Blogs | News | Events | Reviews | Videos | Success | Gold Members | Testimonials

Featured Authors: William Guy, iDenise Nowakowski, iD. Enise, iSam Penny, iR.E.E.S Blogs Linda Smith, Publisher, iHugh McCracken, iC.G. Richardson, i
  Home > Relationships > Articles
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Tina B Tessina

  + Follow Me   

· 497 titles
· 267 Reviews
· Share with Friends!
· Save to My Library
·
Member Since: Mar, 2001

   Sitemap
   My Blog
   Success Story
   Contact Author
   Message Board
   Read Reviews

Newsletter
Subscribe to the Tina B Tessina Newsletter. Enter your name and email below and click "sign me up!"
Name:
Email:


Books
· The Commuter Marriage: Keep Your Relationship Close While You’re Far Apart

· Money, Sex and Kids:

· It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction

· How To Be a Couple and Still Be Free

· The Real Thirteenth Step: Discovering Confidence, Self-Reliance and Independence Beyond the Twelve S

· The 10 Smartest Decisions a Woman Can Make Before 40

· The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again

· The Ten Smartest Decisions a Woman Can Make AFTER Forty


Articles
· Dear Dr. Romance: Can short guys date?

· Dear Dr. Romance: I'm Living with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

· The Meaning of Life

· Dear Dr. Romance: I want to get married

· Dear Dr. Romance: Do you have information on developing autonomy?

· Dr. Romance on Living Outside the Box

· Getting Along With Each Other

· How To Avoid Loving a Jerk

· Dear Dr. Romance: Does Friends with Benefits Work?

· Why Couples Fall out of Love


Poetry
· The Shape of Peace

· Inspiration

· Eternal Dance - Christmas 2005

· On Mitch and Jackie’s engagement

· On love

· Bitter lesson

· Redemption

· ANGELS IN DISGUISE

· Storytellers

· Vessels

         More poetry...
Tina B Tessina, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

Books by Tina B Tessina
Dear Dr. Romance: I Believe He's a Good Man at Heart
By Tina B Tessina
Last edited: Saturday, October 13, 2012
Posted: Saturday, October 13, 2012



Share    Print   Save
Recent articles by
Tina B Tessina

• Dear Dr. Romance: Can short guys date?
• Dear Dr. Romance: I'm Living with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
• The Meaning of Life
• Dear Dr. Romance: I want to get married
• Dear Dr. Romance: Do you have information on developing autonomy?
• Dr. Romance on Living Outside the Box
• Getting Along With Each Other
           >> View all 478
Dr. Romance’s shares 3 tips for letting go of the pain of divorce.

Dear Dr. Romance:

My husband left to be with a much younger women. The problem became obvious in our marriage three years ago. I thought It would be something we would surpass.

I was confused and did not act until one Friday night he did not come home to sleep. He came back that Saturday night and my kids were so happy to see him that I did not ask him to leave that night. Monday morning I finally got the courage and confronted him. He told me that this girl was taking care of him like I used to do when we were dating. He said he was panning to leave and he was just making sure I could take care of things myself.

He came back twice and I thought he wanted to work things out, but he only stayed for a week each time. It has been 10 months since he last left. Somebody has left beheaded doves, chickens, women's underwear (when he was still at home) and other spells on my yard. I know he is a grown man who is able to have a will of his own, but all these things confuse me since I belive he is a good man at heart.

He is making a lot of money and has a position of power for the first time in his life. I feel I need to sort things out with somebody with experience like you who can help me accept our failure. Thanks for listening.

Dear Reader:

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. I'm thinking that when your husband began making a lot of money, he became a lot more attractive to the kind of women he didn't think he could have, and he's childishly living out a fantasy. He is not thinking with his heart.

I don't know what to tell you about the spells in your yard. It could be him or his girlfriend, or it could even be unrelated. Spells will not hurt you: either clean them up and ignore them, or put a counter-spell in your own yard if you believe in that.

Most marriages that split apart like this already have lost their caring connection, which allows the straying spouse to make excuses for his behavior. You need a lawyer. Do whatever it takes to get one, and your husband will probably have to bear the court costs. At least get a consultation; you need to know the divorce laws in your state and the right steps to take, or you can really damage yourself and your children financially.

You're upset and grieving right now, and angry, too. I completely understand that. But, in the midst of your grief, you have to be sure you take care of yourself and your children legally and financially. "3 Tips to Help You from Becoming a Victim of the Drama of Divorce" will help you think more clearly and avoid creating problems for yourself. The following tips may also help you.

Dr. Romance’s 3 tips for letting go of the pain of divorce

If your marriage ends in divorce, you lose more than the marriage itself. Even if your marriage had problems, or you were the one who wanted out, you still will have grief over the dreams and hopes which have died with the relationship. The overwhelming feeling of loss can be confusing and difficult to understand. The following tips will help you move through these feelings and begin to focus on the future.

1. Get Support: The people around you will express a lot of conflicting feelings, because they’re experiencing shock and loss, too. This may be a time when you find out who your true friends are. Some of your friends will avoid dealing with you, or choose your ex. You need trusted friends, family, and a church or support group who will care about you, listen to you, and not judge or try to get you to "get over it."

2. Talk or write it out: Talk and write until you’ve expressed all of your grief and loss, anger, confusion and disappointment. Assume you have a specific number of tears to shed, and the more you express your feelings, the quicker you will come to the end of the tears. Be aware that expressing all your grief may be more than some of your support system want to hear. A support group, clergy person or therapist will be able to listen without judging until you’ve said everything you need to say.

3. Have a ceremony: When you feel ready, create a ceremony for letting go of your grief. You may want to include some of your close friends, ritually destroy a memento which symbolizes your grief or the lost relationship, and share your hopes for the future.

When you are ready, The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again  will help you complete the processing of this divorce and get ready to find a new partner.

UnofficialDating

Web Site Dr. Romance
f

Want to review or comment on this article?
Click here to login!


Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!



Popular Relationships Articles
  1. How to Grow Old Together
  2. The Meaning of Life
  3. Getting Along With Each Other
  4. Why Couples Fall out of Love
  5. Is He Your True Love? One Way to Know For
  6. Dear Dr. Romance: I was always wrong
  7. Creating Family Acceptance
  8. Are You Sex-Starved?
  9. Adventures in Dating
  10. Bummer

How To Be a Couple and Still Be Free by Tina Tessina

“Being a couple yet free is our next challenge on the evolutionary ladder. This book successfully helps us unravel the myths that block that achievement. It does it with warmth, w..  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

You can also search authors by alphabetical listing: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z


Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us


Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen

© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.