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Christine Boyce

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Member Since: Feb, 2003

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Deep Living: Transforming Your Relationship to Everything Th
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In Deep Living, Dr. Roxanne Howe-Murphy illuminates the stunning and paradoxical mechanisms through which our personalities unconsciously take each of us in exactly the o..  
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Blogs by Christine Boyce

Forcing myself
8/12/2005 2:27:19 PM
I've already faced it--I'm not a consistently strong person.
Right now I'm trying to force myself to be consistently energetic.

Red Bull is helping a lot, which means I'm at the beginning of a caffiene addiction, perhaps.

But without it, it was so hard to get up in the morning, or do the things I want and need to do.

It was very hard to put my mind and energy to anything consistently, day after day. I would go through some periods of great energy, then exhaustion.

The exhaustion was embarrasing and worrying. Nobody likes to make the kinds of mistakes people tend to make when they go a night without sleep. But I'd make those mistakes even with six hours of sleep, or get tired in the mid-afternoon. I kept procrastinating about anything I could procrastinate about, and though critical things were getting done, I was far short of my goals.

There is something wrong, mentally or metabolically, that is causing this--it makes my capabilities, mental and physical, drastically different on a day to day basis.

I want to be confident and focused and performing on a reasonable level every day.

I'm tired of being tired.

So, maybe Red Bull will help--along with eating better and getting in the habit of doing more.

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More Blogs by Christine Boyce
• Confused... - Friday, May 08, 2009
• It has been four years... - Sunday, April 12, 2009
• I can't help... - Thursday, August 18, 2005
• 10-minute play - Wednesday, August 17, 2005
• Relearning - Friday, August 12, 2005
•  Forcing myself - Friday, August 12, 2005  

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