Blogs by Claywoman
More Mental Musings....
1/16/2006 11:49:43 PM
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I am back...sort of...the demons have not left me yet and writing isn't coming my way at all. This has been a hell of a year and I must say, one of the worst I've ever experienced. I am a college dropout now and I don't know when I will have the strength to ever go back. The poetry that flows from my soul is no longer there, I don't know what to do! I know I have more songs to sing, but where are they hiding? I'm scared, what if I never write again, then what?
I did have a good holiday with my family, I didn't see much of my son and daughter-in-law, they had other plans, but I did see my grandson Dustee who moved to Seattle and came home just for a week. I feel so much closer to him as we talk to each other almost every night on AIM. I think I've shocked him a time or two with the fact that I see nothing wrong with pot, and I endulged in it a time or two myself. Also the thought that at one time his granny was once a sexual being also leaves him trembling...hehehe
Genni and I are getting closer to each other although we only talk once a week. Speaking of my weeks, I need more hours!!! One of the worst things that has gone on with me lately is the state taking six weeks to approve my antidepressant, may I say, I now know what drug addicts go through when they try and quit heroin!!! I went through all and I mean ALL the symptoms of withdrawl...I never, ever want to do that ever again!!!
Well, I've now written more tonight then I have in six months and I still don't feel better, maybe I will be better tomorrow night at this time.
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