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Andrew Attias

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Member Since: May, 2006

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Blogs by Andrew Attias

The inside workings of a Private Detective...
3/19/2007 2:57:32 AM    [ Flag as Inappropriate ]

Bogg opened his mouth to let out a sort of ‘aargh’ noise. No sound came out although his jaws were gaped quite widely. His eyes were open even wider and the eyeballs bulged unnaturally
in their sockets. As someone shook the door impatiently, the clip broke on the clothesline. The elastic travelled back to the winder mechanism on the far wall at several times the legal
speed limit and catapulted a drip-dried sock at an even faster speed directly into Boggs open mouth. It was still there when he opened the door.

Ms Daffodiltuliptree (not her real name but as Bogg could never understand her whenever she said her name, this was one of the various ones he called her) was ninety-four years old. Never
a very tall person, she had now shrunk further with age and illness and was therefore only ever so slightly taller than Bogg.

“Where’s my Tibbles?” she demanded.

Bogg blinked. His face was still as white as his beard and much whiter than his mouth-protruding sock.

“You told me you could guarantee quick results. Five days is not quick,” she pointed out.

Bogg blinked again.

“Sorry, have I interrupted your dinner?” Mrs Daffodiltuliptree suddenly seemed concerned.

Bogg blinked back in reply.

“Please find my Tibbles,” she implored meekly. “OR I WON’T PAY YOU!”

Leaving the stunned Bogg still blinking, she turned her heels and returned to her apartment, where she promptly turned her heels the right way ‘round again. Bogg blinked at the now empty corridor and closed the door. Perhaps he had better find Tibbles.

Three very strong cups of coffee later, J.Bogg Det., P.I. was ready for some crime solving. Although he didn’t actually plan on leaving the hotel, he put on his raincoat and trilby hat so that he could feel the part. Feeling the part always helped him to think and in Boggs case, thinking needed all the help it could get. Of course, after the episode earlier with the remote control, there were some other parts that Bogg wished he could feel but couldn’t yet. He hoped the numbness would go away later. Meanwhile, to the job in hand. Before opening his door, Bogg lit a cigarette. He didn’t like cigarettes but wanted to make sure the image was right in case anybody saw him. ‘Aha’, people would say (or so he thought), ‘there goes a clever and successful private investigator’. This thought always made him feel good. With positive thoughts flowing, he strode out of his room to solve the case.

Grinning with confidence, he stepped out of his doorway and onto his beard. He swiftly fell flat on his face, squashing both his nose and the cigarette...


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More Blogs by Andrew Attias
• Bogg appears in a Magic book! - Tuesday, June 19, 2007
• Poet's Day - Tuesday, March 20, 2007
•  The inside workings of a Private Detective... - Monday, March 19, 2007  
• Of Douglas Adams and Rhinoceros… - Friday, March 16, 2007
• What the Snirks have to say about politics… - Thursday, March 15, 2007
• Dear Sir... - Wednesday, March 14, 2007
• An excerpt featuring the V.E.A.G. - Tuesday, March 13, 2007
• Rethithtanth Planth - Monday, March 12, 2007
• Uh oh, what are they up to? - Friday, March 09, 2007
• No more peace and quiet - Wednesday, March 07, 2007
• An excerpt from Bogg! - Tuesday, March 06, 2007
• Mysterious - Monday, February 05, 2007
• Red Alert - Tuesday, October 10, 2006
• Signed copies now available!* - Monday, August 21, 2006
• Thankth for your thupport - Thursday, June 22, 2006
• Time for some decorum - Thursday, June 22, 2006
• I wish I would stop punching me! - Wednesday, June 21, 2006
• Bogg! - Wednesday, May 24, 2006
• Bogg! - Wednesday, May 24, 2006
• Bogg! - Wednesday, May 24, 2006


The Victrola by Ann Streetman

The Dallas County Archives show important events occurring in Dallas in 1927: Sergeant Alvin York and Charles Lindbergh visited the city. A rash of robberies shocked the citizenry...  
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