Blogs by Marcus Dino
Fifi's Thoughts
7/21/2007 8:12:39 PM
I've been around as long as Harry why am I not a billionaire?
Well today being Harry Potter and his last book day we can also call 2007 Harry's ten year anniversary as it was almost exactly ten years ago to the day that a struggling young mother named JK Rowling published Harry Potter and the Sorecer's Stone. Well you people know the rest. Ms Rowling has over 300 million books in print. Meanwhile it was ten years ago that a struggling (and still struggling) writer named Marcus Dino started banging on his old Packard Bell (you folks remember those great Packard Bells and those lovely ERROR MESSAGES ON THE INTERNET?) computer using what was it Microsoft Word about a silly girl who likes singing the French national anthem for kicks. Well I'm still trying to make history. WAAAAAA WHY DO THOSE LITERARY GODS LOOK SO FAVORABLY ON JK AND HARRY AND NOT MARCUS AND I or any of you other struggling authors den writers for that matter?
I know it's probably that secret potion that Harry and those Hogwarths make that puts people in a spell every time a Potter book or movie comes out that says "buy me, buy me" or "see me, see me." Harry with that Hogwarth's potions put that Scholastic Publisher in a deep trance to print 300 million books while my autobiography and a lot of excellent writers manuscripts were rejected by publisher after publisher. Harry and that Hogwarths potion put over 300 million people in a deep trance to buy his books while my autobiography and a lot of excellent writers' books are collecting cobwebs on some Borders or independent bookstore's shelves. SIGH.
I just bought 'Secret Hallows' today and like any other Potter book or movie I CAN'T GET INTO IT.. Over seven hundred pages of deep reading and well I guess a few big things happen to good old Harry. I just guess like any other Harry Potter book or movie I'm going to have to drink a lot of coffee or take a few caffeine pills trying to stay awake to understand what's going on.
Marcus you're getting lazy. JK has written 7 long drawn out, time consuming, puts people to sleep, bestselling novels and has had what 4 long, drawn out, timeconsuming, puts people to sleep blockbuster movies out and you still haven't written Fifi 2?
Other things you can do with the recent bestsellers besides reading them. Obviously a recent bestseller makes an excellent sleeping pill as they are so long and drawn out you'll have know trouble getting your zzzzs. For a short person like me I put a few recent bestsellers on top of my stool and it makes it easier for me to change the lights. If you live in a place where it gets cold you can save a lot of money on fuel and firewood where you can tear out the pages of recent bestsellers to light up your fireplace. Finally make sure to take a few recent bestselling books when you take a long plane flight or maybe they'll a recent bestselling movie cause you'll go to sleep in no time and that flight will seem real short.
Years that end in 7 trivia. we've been talking about Summer of love trivia in the last few blogs and of course we mentioned 1997 in this blog. How about the Summer of 1977. You know Star Wars, Summer of Sam, Saturday Night Fever (love that movie), NYC blackout, and of course Disco for you Genxers and baby boomers. Now what about summer of 87? I was actually around then although a baby. HMMM the 'stock market crash,' Dirty Dancing, Predator, Mike Tyson knocking people out, and 'I want your Sex' by George Michael and 'Walk like an Egyptian' by the Bangles. As for 1957 (Marcus were you born around then) or 1947, well dinosaurs ruled the earth back than. Just kidding that's when Marylin and Judy ruled the earth (at least Hollywood).
Just saw the debut of 'Sunshine' at a West LA theater and I just can't believe how many geeks were out there to see it. Even the midnight showing was packed. Of course I'm a bit of a geek girl myself so I shouldn't talk. You know Sunshine is one of those geek Sci Fi movies ala 2001, Logan's Run, Office Space, Planet of the Apes, Alien, and of course all the Star Trek and Star Wars movies. I'm sorry but I was a bit confused and disappointed with Sunshine. In 50 short years the Sun is dying and the Earth will START FREEZING. I hate to say but if the sun starts dying it will be the other way as the SUN WILL GET BIGGER AND WELL LETS SAY VEGAS IN JULY WILL FEEL LIKE THE ARTIC IN COMPARISON TO HOW HOT IT WILL GET. We'll all know what those poor barbecued hot dogs feel like. The other silly part in Sunshine was those people so close to the Sun (Hint right next to Mercury) trying to send a measly little nuclear warhead trying to 'jumpstart' the sun AND THEY DIDN"T BURN UP?
Anyways back to Sunshine's 'geek' audience, there were so many geeks there everybody has T shirts that said 'Caltech Beavers', 'Microsoft programmers', 'NYU Film School Tigers', 'Silicon Valley hackers', and 'Dotcom Softball Team.' There were so many geeks there that a fellow geek looked at me in amazement when I said I needed to get a cup of Java and was worried that I did not shut my car Windows. He never heard those terms outside of computer jargon. There were so many geeks there that when the usher passed out questionaires about the demographics of the audience not one of the questionaires said yes to Were you a high school jock or cheerleader and all the questionaires said yes to Were you in the chess or science club in high school? There were so many geeks there that nobody put there hand up when the usher asked the audience how many of you are out on a romantic (not platonic) date tonite? I believe they did a scientific study and found the average 'Sunshine' viewer had twice the IQ of the average 'Saws' viewer. Well just to prove I'm an all around person the next movie I watch will be Hairspray where all the former jocks and cheerleaders will go and the average intellectual capacity will be much lower. I mean I have to be around smart brainy people once in a while to get an intellectual 'high.' The rest of the time being an actress I hang around Hollywood types. Way way than enough thoughts for now.
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