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Marcus Dino

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Blogs by Marcus Dino

Fifi's Thoughts
6/14/2008 8:56:32 AM
Omigosh my home state is under water

Father's Day may be tommorrow but for a lot of us Iowans it feels more like Friday the 13th which was yesterday. All of us transplanted sons and daughters of Iowa and any Earthling who cares about others needs to do what they can to help people in Iowa and other Midwestern states who are affected by these terrible storms and floods. My family didn't evacuate our home in West Des Moines but a lot of people who live out there did because of the floods caused by the overflowing Racoon river. I read that US Olympic hopeful Shawn Johnson's gym was also affected by the floods.

Ayways I'm doing what I can to help as I'm seeing pictures of not only my home town of Des Moines being flooded but surrounding cities like Cedar Rapids looking like a big lake and it reminds me of....you know Katrina and what the people of New Orleans went through a few years ago. People in Cedar Rapids have water up to their second story windows and their cars are under water and they are being rescued by boat. very sad.....

Sooooo I'm sending money donations via Red Cross to help my unfortunate brothers and sisters out there. I was thinking of taking a few days off from work to go to Iowa and help people out any way I could. Alocki my best friend and who's the smartest person I ever met from the planet Zatoris, offered to take me in her portable 'rocket ship' which looks like a minijet because I can't afford a plane ticket but I decided just to send donations instead.

It's definitely becoming a year of disasters. We had China and the earthquake last month and I read this morning that Japan was hit by a big quake.
It proves that Nature (or maybe it's an angry Lord) doesn't spare anyone on this Earth. Midwesterners and people living in the east and south need flood and tornado insurance just like Californians need earthquake insurance and Hawaiians need volcano or tsunami insurance. The Lord doesn't make it a perfect place for anyone to live on this Earth and He expects everyone to contribute and help people who are hit by natural disasters because the next place that's hit COULD BE WHERE YOU LIVE.

Alright back to more of my silly humor but a few more items on a sad serious note. I just heard that political commentator Tim Russert passed away yesterday at the young age of 58. Father and I really enjoyed watching him chat with all the political big shots on 'Meet the Press.' He was just so sharp and witty and could argue with the best of them. I'll really miss him and I also lament the passing today of NFL football announcer Charlie Jones. Rest in peace Tim and Charlie.

EXERCISE AND LOSE WEIGHT. EXERCISE AND LIVE LONGER. EXERCISE AND KEEP THE AIR CLEANER. EXERCISE AND SAVE ON THESE DARNED BLOODY OUTRAGEOUS GAS PRICES.

I have bought myself a bike and am riding my bike everywhere and not only am I losing weight but I keep my gas guzzling truck in my carport. I mean being a struggling waitress I just can't afford to drive that truck all over the place with the way these gas prices it seems on a daily basis. PRETTY SOON GAS PRICES PER GALLON WILL BE HIGHER THAN THE MINIMUM WAGE PEOPLE LIKE ME MAKE PER HOUR. I sure need to smile and be friendly to all these people out there so I can get the best tips. A few male wolf customers would like to see me give them an 'extra service' but I just smile at them and tell them I need a human 'punching bag' to practice my tae kwon doe moves on and would they be interested?

Anyways I'm gonna save my pennies and trade my gas guzzling truck for one of those small gas saving imports because the price of gas has gone up so fast that pretty soon people are gonna be on the lookout for skateboards that have an engine and a gas tank because even driving a motorcycle will cost too much. The price of gas has gone up so fast that I'm going to the nearest dude ranch or the nearest glue factory and see how much I can get on a good horse. I can just tether up Trigger to my carport assuming my manager doesn't complain and for heaven sakes, water, hay, and paying an enviromental company to dispose of Trigger's you know what can't be any more expensive than buying gas these days. I wonder if I can get a good deal on Big Brown now that he blew the Belmont. The price of gas has gone up so fast that I feel like getting into a plane and flying to where the nearest fatcat Big oil company CEO lives or where the nearest oil minister and giving them a good swift one in their pompus overpaid rear ends. It's just that I can't afford an airplane ticket because of the skyhigh fuel prices.

You people remember a magazine character called "Betsy McCall" from that defunct McCall's magazine? Just another mediocre redhead who never could quite make it. I'm sorry but don't compare me to Betsy McCall, 'Wendy' the hamburger girl, Kim Possible, Ms 'E insurance', 'Daphne' from Scooby Dooby Doo, and last but not least that.... 'Josie the Pussycat.' I have more talent than all those cartoon character redheads put together. It's just that their agent was more agressive and was able to get them those roles. I wonder how much 'Wendy' makes in residuals from all her commercials. While we're at if those stuck up no talent 'Bratz girls' can have their dolls and of course there's that ageless blonde bimbo 'Barbie' why can't there be a 'Fifi' doll? Young girls would love me. JERRY GET AGRESSIVE.

I mean I truly truly truly truly truly don't have to worry about a potential SAG strike coming up since I CAN'T GET ROLES AND AM NOT MAKING ANY MONEY RIGHT JERRY?

I just saw that my old SATs correspond to an IQ that puts like in the top 2 percent, you know MENSA like. I mean I feel kind of brainy when I'm with my fellow waitresses but I guess that's better than feeling like a dummy if I say worked at a place like Google or Microsoft with all those Super Geeks.

You people remember "double features?" You don't see those anymore. It would be torture showing one Double Os stinko movie after another.

Weekly Double Os stinkos. Incredible Hulk. Edward Norton turning into a giant big green computer generated thing. I wonder what if that 'thing' went to the bathroom, would it come out looking like big green boulders? Why don't you ever see any of these super heroes or fantasy figures ever need to go to the potty? If I play a role in a movie then I'll demand a line saying that I have to go because I'm well....human. Also it being Father's Day and that 'thing' being so huge, how could it be a father, you know with a regular sized woman like Liv Tyler. I'm just proud to be made out of flesh and blood and am not computer generated but you know the studios they'll want computer generated people pretty soon to save a buck on big salaries. I mean we are already seeing that with these dumb reality shows. GET AGRESSIVE SAG.

Super Duper Stinker. Quid Pro Quo. I have no idea what is going on in this ridiculous movie. People actually wanting to be paralyzed? I went to sleep halfway through the movie and am glad I did because I didn't miss a thing.

I just saw a picture of Warren Beatty hugging Al Pacino at the AFI Lifetime Achievement Award saluting Warren. Somebody should have said WARREN YOU NEED TO REALIZE AL IS NOT THE AWARD, PLEASE PUT HIM BACK DOWN. Omigosh potty mouth potty mouth, didn't mean to disparage Al's height being only a little over 5 feet tall myself.

I'm sorry but now that it's Fathers Day because I'm spending two days writing this darn blog I have a lot more respect for a hard working father who needs to get up in the morning and put in a hard days work five or six days in order to support his family, not some rich celebrity father who spoils his kids rotten or even worse.....a deadbeat dad.

Speaking of a perfect movie for Fathers Day, Cinema Classics should show "Cheaper by the Dozen" with Clifton Webb and Myrna Loy. That movie is so funny. If it's out on DVD you need to rent it, unlike the lousy movies made today, it's worth spending a few bucks to watch it.

I will now do almost all my shopping at the One Buck or Less or 99 Cents stores. With these ridiculously high fuel prices I can't afford to go anywhere else.

I just saw some blurb in Forbes about the 100 most powerful actors, actresses, celebrities whatever in Hollywood. HOW ABOUT THE 100 LUCKIEST CELEBRITIES. Had those contacts, had their big break, got friendly with someone on the 'casting couch' which I will NEVER DO. They don't represent 99.9 percent of us struggling actresses and actors WHO WILL WORK FOR FOOD. GET THE JOB DONE SAG.

One last 'thought.' Since horse and buggys will be popular pretty soon with these horrible gas prices I wonder how much a fully loaded one, you know with air conditioning will cost? Way way way more than enough thoughts for now. HAPPY FATHER'S DAY Y'ALL.





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