Blogs by S y D
Is Your Child Truly Safe...?
6/22/2009 12:12:24 PM
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Is there any limit to which you would go to protect your Child???
Every parent spends the better part of their day (and nights) trying to insure they have done everything in their power to keep their children safe.... Safe from harmful chemicals around the house, safe from diseases, safe from bullies in the neighborhood, safe from destructive, value-molding television programs, safe from strangers, etc. I can go on and on about all the things that plague our minds during the quiet moments we take to reflect on what's important.
Let me stop and place a mental door stopper right here to ask... "Just how often do you take the time to sit and talk about sexual abuse or sexual predators? Do you even know if your child has ever been approached by a stranger.... or worse, a family member or 'friend' of the family? Are you sure of what your child would do if the situation ever presented itself? Would they tell you?
Would they be too ashamed or scared to talk about it? Would they minimize what has been said or done, only to suppress it? Have you made a deliberate decision to instilled within your child with the confidence to speak up and 'TELL' in the event they were ever inappropriately propositioned?
These are all very important questions you should know the answers to. The statistics are overwhelming and frightening in regard to child sexual abuse. According to the experts, 1 out of every 3-4 young girls and 1 out of every 5-6 young boys will be sexually abused before adulthood.... and these stats are based on those who actually tell. Personally, I think we're moving into an age where 1 out of every 2 children (males and females inclusive) will experience some form of sexual violation before adulthood if we are not vigilant about creating some degree of comfortability discussing such topics. Fewer and fewer mothers and fathers are at home because they are being forced to work multiple jobs and longer hours just to make ends meet. That's why it is imperative for us to equip our children with the ability to feel free and confident enough to have open discussions about what goes on when we're not around.
Just the other day my daughter came home from school and shared about a science lesson she'd had. The teacher was pointing out and naming the various parts of the body and eventually made her way to a discussion about the excess skin on the elbow.... which we know is called the "wenis". Of course, the children got a major kick out of that tidbit of information and they laughed uncontrollably for quite some time. While I don't believe the teacher had any malious intent when sharing that physiological fact, it could be miscontrued as an open door to other more sexually charged discussions either with the teacher or amongst the students. As a survivor of child sexual abuse, that brought out the suspious nature in me and I further questioned my daughter about where that discussion led. By the way, now would be a good time to also note... of the two sexes, by far women out rank the men as sexual perpetrators. In my experiences as a child victim, I can say that many of the incidences of abuse started with very subtle discussions or actions which later opened the door to victimization. This is a very minor example but definitely something to pay attention to.
With this in mind, it is our responsibility as parents to be aware of those kinds of things and not to take any small incident for granted before asking questions of our children. No... I'm not implying that we should make a mountain out of every mole hill or give our children the impression that there is a perpetrator under every rock, however, I am advising all parents to listen carefully to what their children have to say and spend time everyday dialoging with them to find out what's going on in their world.
As a matter of information, I would like to open up a discussion with any parent who feels comfortable enough to share any stories or experiences about which they felt suspious or uncomfortable involving your child(ren) and an adult in authority. Please keep names anonymous and don't share any information that may divulge how you or your child are. As an author who has written a very detailed account of the incidences of abuse in my life, my life has become an open book so if you have read my personal life story and have any questions, feel free to ask them. You can submit your questions in my blog but send a copy of it to my email address where I can later make my phone number available should you desire to talk personally. My email address is icoach4success.yahoo.com.
If you choose to purchase my book just visit my website at http://www.empoweryourchild.info
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