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Regis Auffray

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Member Since: Sep, 2002

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Featured Book
The Wolf's Torment
by S Cardin

In this spine-tingling novel, the crown prince of Moldavia must fight demons that haunt his family and his country when a werewolf bites his best friend...  
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Books by
Regis Auffray



Glimpses

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Born Again - The Limericks of Régis

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Blogs by Regis Auffray

Puns
1/17/2009 7:05:00 PM    [ Flag as Spam or Inappropriate ]

If you like puns, these aren't bad...
Please note that I did not write these.

If you like puns, these aren't bad...

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

9. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a peach.

10. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

11. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'

12. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

13. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

14. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

16. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

17. A backward poet writes inverse.

18. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In Feudalism it's your Count that votes.

19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion



Comments (16)

More Blogs by Regis Auffray
• Changes Are Coming - Monday, December 13, 2010
• More on Paraprosdokians... - Thursday, October 28, 2010
• Paraprosdokians - Sunday, October 17, 2010
• Why Can't I Own A Canadian? - Friday, August 13, 2010
• Puns for the Educated... ...?!? - Thursday, February 11, 2010
• Aspiring Writers - Sunday, January 17, 2010
• For All Who Have Wept, Weep, and Will Weep - Thursday, December 17, 2009
• A little more in the realm of humor/humour... ...as kids see it. - Sunday, November 22, 2009
• A Little Biblical Humor - Tuesday, November 03, 2009
• Sharing a smile or two... - Tuesday, September 08, 2009
• Grandma's Smokes - Thursday, August 27, 2009
• The Sandpiper - Saturday, April 25, 2009
• Newfoundland Ghost Story - Saturday, April 04, 2009
• Please help... ...it only takes a couple of minutes. - Saturday, February 21, 2009
• À Propos the Economic Crisis... - Saturday, February 07, 2009
• When Insults Had Class - Saturday, January 31, 2009
•  Puns - Saturday, January 17, 2009  
• My daughter's article - Friday, November 28, 2008
• The Apocalypse Quiz - Sunday, November 23, 2008
• A Lesson on the Limerick - Sunday, November 02, 2008
• Love - Wednesday, September 24, 2008
• Synesthesia - Sunday, September 07, 2008
• The Human Body - Sunday, August 03, 2008
• A short note about "only..." - Sunday, July 27, 2008
• The English Language - Thursday, July 10, 2008
• Age - Wednesday, July 02, 2008
• A New Element Found! - Tuesday, June 17, 2008
• A Sobering Look At The Results Of Rising Oil Prices - Tuesday, June 03, 2008
• Why Computers Sometimes Crash - Monday, May 12, 2008
• For The Pun Of It - Friday, April 18, 2008
• Rachel Corrie - Friday, March 14, 2008
• LOVE - Sunday, February 17, 2008
• Oh Where, Oh Where Has My AD Mail Gone? - Saturday, February 16, 2008
• The Old Man and the Dog - Monday, January 28, 2008
• Attitude - Saturday, January 19, 2008
• The Hospital Window - Saturday, January 12, 2008
• Wisdom? - Wednesday, January 09, 2008
• Guess what? Happy New Year (J t'a J...) - Saturday, December 29, 2007
• Je t'aime, J......, - Sunday, December 09, 2007
• Why...? - Saturday, November 24, 2007
• More on blood... - Sunday, September 23, 2007
• Blood Types and Personality - Wednesday, September 19, 2007
• Love... - Sunday, August 19, 2007
• Help save the EARTH! - Monday, July 09, 2007
• Happy Fourth of July... - Wednesday, July 04, 2007
• I'm still here... - Wednesday, June 27, 2007
• Why... - Wednesday, June 20, 2007
• I did not know... - Saturday, June 16, 2007
• Often since meeting you... - Thursday, May 10, 2007
• Encounters... - Saturday, March 31, 2007
• Blog Tag... - Sunday, February 25, 2007
• Sadness - Friday, February 09, 2007
• The limerick... - Saturday, January 06, 2007
• When? - Saturday, December 30, 2006


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