AuthorsDen.com  Join (free) | Login 

   Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!

Signed Bookstore | Authors | eBooks | Books | Stories | Articles | Poetry | Blogs | News | Events | Reviews | Videos | Success | Gold Members | Testimonials

Featured Authors: Larry Matthews, iKaylin McFarren, iSafi Abdi, iEugene Stovall, iRaymond Reifinger, iMichael Harrington, iAnthony (Tony) Sharp, i
  Home > Humor > Poetry
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Patrick A Granfors

· Become a Fan
  Notify me of new titles
  added by this author.

· 529 titles
· 5,999 Reviews
· Share with a Friend
· Save to My Library
· Add to My Favorites
·
Member Since: May, 2009

   Sitemap
   My Blog
   Contact Author
   Read Reviews


Short Stories
· Strawberry Green Springs

· Transitions

· Drip Line


Articles
· Fabulous Eight Bean Soup

· Consequences

· Mighty Fine Stuffed Cabbage Rolls

· Phobos-Grunt Re-entry

· My Second Ozark Boat Ride

· Marinating on my TV

· A Penny For My Thoughts?

· Time for Confusion

· Alzyisms Part 7 - Partial Reconciliation

· Alzyisms - Part 6


Poetry
· Encounter

· Redneck Valentine

· Riding the Rails

· Shaking in Spaghettiland

· Pirate's Dream

· When Pigs (Almost) Fly

· Thorny

· Tick Tack Toe

· To Mom on Dad’s Day

· A Stone’s Throw

         More poetry...

Patrick A Granfors, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

  A Few More Improbable Word Origins
by Patrick A Granfors
Friday, January 14, 2011
Rated "G" by the Author.

Share   Print   Save Become a Fan


Recent poems by Patrick A Granfors
•  Encounter
•  Redneck Valentine
•  Riding the Rails
•  Shaking in Spaghettiland
•  Pirate's Dream
•  When Pigs (Almost) Fly
•  Thorny
•  Tick Tack Toe
•  To Mom on Dad’s Day
•  A Stone’s Throw
•  Don’t Mourn the US Post Office’s Demise
•  My Own Diamond Jubilee
•  The Transit of Venus
•  It’s National Donut Day!
           >> View all 504


Never would have figured.


 

 

  • Chastity – Elizabethan derivative of “chase” & “titty”, primarily resulting from the King’s displeasure with his leaping lord’s for their hot pursuit of his ladies’ bosoms which led to the development of specially designed belts.

 

  • Senators – Derivative of the Arabic word “sena,” which means “to praise” and “toros,” Spanish for “the bull”, hence “to praise the bull.” (see also, “bullshit”)

 

  • Vocational – Derivative of “vocal” and “occasional”, the ability to control one’s incessant chatter.

 

  • Probate – Derivative of “probe” and “bait”, the state sponsored dragnet that roots around in your tackle box while fishing for estate revenue.

 

  • President – Birthers’ derivative of “present” and “identity”, a fragmented group’s contention that Obama’s birth identity and current identity are nationally different.

 

  • Hebrew – Simple derivative of “He “and “brew”, a male dominated cult of beer makers.

 

  • Barstool – Another simple derivative of “bar” and “stool” which describes the end result of eating greasy hamburgers at your local tavern.

 

  • Romantics – Diocesan derivative of “Roman” and “antics,” describing various indiscretions with altar boys.

 

  • Repulsive – Used to describe the successful implimentation of a defibrillator.

 

  • Audible – Obnoxious subliminal advertising derivative of “Audi,” the car, and “dibble,” which means to plant.

 

  • Catatonic  - Used to describe tonic water that has gone flat

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright © 2011 Patrick Granfors

 

 




Want to review or comment on this poem?
Click here to login!


Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!




Reviewed by Ronald Hull 1/16/2011
Hahahahahaha...

Ron
Reviewed by Kate Burnside 1/16/2011
Senators is really convincing, Patrick! Catatonic... hmmmm... isn't this also a word that describes the tranquilising effect some felines have on us stressed-out humans?! :)) These are compelling and addictive... definitions please!!!!!!!!!!!! xx
Reviewed by Regis Auffray 1/15/2011
I love your wit and humor; this is so very clever, Patrick. Thanks for the smiles. Love and peace to you,

Regis
Reviewed by Karen Palumbo 1/15/2011
My goodness, this is as precious as the last one you wrote, very creative...

Be always safe,
Karen
Reviewed by Annabel Sheila 1/15/2011
Hilarious!!!!! Thanks for the chuckles so early on this fine Saturday morning! You're a hoot!!!

Anna
Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan 1/15/2011
funny stuff!
Reviewed by George Carroll 1/15/2011
Now I know why I'm so repulsive. Shocking
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 1/15/2011
You've convinced me to stop eating at my local tavern - just drinks from now on.
Reviewed by Christine Tsen 1/14/2011
A playful and eloquent collection here...
Christine
Reviewed by Chip Bergeron 1/14/2011
Oooooohhhhhh-Kay!!!!!!!!

Chip Bergeron
Reviewed by The Poetess 1/14/2011
HEE! HEE!
Reviewed by Mark Lichterman 1/14/2011
How in the hell do you think up this stuff, Patrick? I hate to think of the origin of my name: Lichterman....Actually, the name is German for the man that lit the gas lights.
Mark... Uh, like a spot?
Reviewed by JASMIN HORST SEILER 1/14/2011
He brew, they brew, who knew, most of them drunk on honey wine all the time, you forgot fornicate, but it's not too late, please carry on, I like your dictionary, nary a word is boring.
Hugs! Jasmin Horst
Reviewed by Ed Matlack 1/14/2011
Another "sick" write from he who is the sickest of them all...e
   - eBooks
   - Marketplace
   - FaceBook

Popular
Poetry
(Humor)
  1. If I Could Be A Super Hero
  2. My A.L.F. & me...
  3. Knowing Jack
  4. The Land of Sandra Dee -- Anonymous author
  5. Ode to Politicians
  6. Snorting the LIne...
  7. I Want a Donut
  8. Budweiser’s Revenge
  9. le lieu
  10. Female VS Male poems...
  11. Charisma
  12. Petunia
  13. Stuffed Like the Proverbial Turkey…
  14. GREEN BOLOGNA
  15. Confusion say: Man who scratch ass should





You can also search authors by alphabetical listing: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z


Bookmark this page to your Favorites

Featured Authors
| New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us


Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen

© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.