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Erica Ivory

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Member Since: Dec, 2002

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Featured Book
I was a Pan Am Princess of the Sky
by Fumiko Takahashi

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Bottom Of Your Totem Pole
by Erica Ivory
Sunday, February 13, 2005
Rated "G" by the Author.
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           >> View all 376

I live in the shadow..
Of the one you desire..
Do you think that I don't know..
I am your second hand girl..
Taken out..
Only when needed..
Then faded..
into the back ground of your lives..
Yet I am your daughter..
Your wife..
Your sister..
Your friend..
But second hand to all of you..
I don't even bother to pretend..
that I could be any more..
than what I am...
Your second hand girl..
Bottom of your totem poles..
Buried in the snow..
Taken out only when needed..
Then back to the cold I go..
I do not have delusions of ever being  first..
On the top..
Someone special..
I am not..
I will always be your second hand girl..
Not quite good enough..
to ever be completely included in your world..
Your families..
Your love..
I will never measure up..
To all your hearts desires..
Yet I continue to try..
To be seen..
Like fighting fire with gasoline..
So now I stop..
I accept what others see in me..
I guess I will  try to succeed in being
the best second hand girl...
I can possibly be.
What choice do I have..
I can't make you love me more..
Can't make you see beyond what you see..
But as this second hand girl..
I want you to know..
I would rather be left..
buried in the snow..
It may be cold..
I may be alone..
But there I am safe..
from your hand carved totem poles.


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Reviewed by Kathleen Herrick 6/5/2005
Wow, I've felt like this slightly once. Not quit so evident as this but, yes. I hope you find happiness.
Reviewed by Fritz Barnes 2/28/2005
How sad, how painful. Evocative, well-written piece.
Reviewed by *********** ********** (Reader) 2/21/2005
You said it in your second last line....Safe

To be safe is to breathe with all of your lung...It is a blessing.

Another gem......ty, Dani
Reviewed by Mitzi Jackson 2/15/2005
this is a woderfully felt piece.....
hurt and sad~ness of that you fel you can't be or have
love yourself (those who can relate) and break out of the mold
you'll be surprised what can/will happen
Reviewed by John Bidwell 2/13/2005
When we least expect, someone can turn the world upside down.
You belong in the sky.
Reviewed by Judy Lloyd (Reader) 2/13/2005
I think that my niece could have written this one. Excellent write here.
Reviewed by Kate Clifford 2/13/2005
Powerful write with a great message within it. I would say you are beyond his expectations and flowing towards the man that deserves such a pearl. Swine never understand the light.
Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader) 2/13/2005
You only got one life girl. And it's not to be humiliated by someone who cares not.

You gotta be you, not some-ones accessory, show thing...
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 2/13/2005
Emotionally touching piece Erica!!

Take Care and Be well!!

Love tinka
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