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Andy James Turner

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The Truth to Tell
by Andy James Turner

Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Andy James Turner
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           >> View all 95


He fell did Tell in the fountain
Down town
Bailiff Gessler he did frown
and locked him up in jail

“Stop being the clown
Hey Tell do tell Tell
You handy with an arrow?”

“I never make mess as
I never ever miss”

Gessler put an apple
Upon his wife’s head
Tied her to a tree

“A good shot and
I’ll set you free”

Tell took an arrow from his quiver
The wife was scared
The wife did shiver
Tell took aim
Gessler sneezed

Bad aim
You’ve shot her in the liver
Try another one
Here’s my charming son”

Tell took aim
Gessler sneezed
“What a shame
Its hit his brain”

Gessler had Tell
Thrown In a boat
Crossed the moat
At Kussnacts castle
Manacled in the dungeon

Gessler came with bread and water
Shot Gessler in the head
And ran off with his daughter

Off to England they did go
To marry her
As the bump began to show

Robin Hood (was riding through the glen)

“How do you do
My name is Tell
I need an aim that’s true
So I came to visit you”
He told him of his plight
After the initial Little John fight

Robin gave Tell a telling glare
"How can I tell Tell
That you’re really Tell tell"


“My passport portrait
Picture from my pocket
Passport pass”

“Nice pocket passport portrait picture
Mines not as perfect”
Robin taught Tell how to aim
The way a hero ought"

Tell put an apple on a lads head
The aim was true
The lad dropped dead

“Friar Tuck, what
Jolly good luck
I need you to marry me”

“I can see you’ve had a…”
They were married beneath
The tree as his wife gave birth
So merry!

Merry men made merriment
Maid made merry with mead and wine

Subsequent too Robins solution
Tell went home and won the
Swiss revolution

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Reviewed by Mary Ann Biddinger 4/24/2012
Hilarious tale the truth to tell. Enjoyed this aimlessly Andy.
Lady Mary Ann
Reviewed by Diana Wiles 4/23/2012
Such good fun!...thoroughly enjoyedf this...
Reviewed by Phyllis Jean Green 4/22/2012
How clever!! Great fun, to boot !!!

Keep 'em comin', Andy!

Keep 'em comin' !!

xOx Phyllis xOx
Reviewed by D. Vaineo 4/20/2012
Andrew, Like a mini-play. Very funny and cute!

Reviewed by Kate Burnside 4/19/2012
:)) xx You are excellent at these comic balladic rhymes, Andy; they are so unforced and all your vast wealth of historic and social history, understanding and knowledge flow effortlessly. Your "Horrible Histories" could be every bit as best-selling as the originals and contain "facts" in ways that our Pooh-brains can latch on to and remember. Delightful! xx
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 4/19/2012
Now that was funny…

Reviewed by T Jett (Reader) 4/19/2012
Nice to read your post again, Andy. It's been awhile and you haven't lost your touch :) Wonderful tale that brought me a smile!
Reviewed by Patrick Granfors 4/19/2012
As funny a fairy tale as I've encountered. Needs to be a cartoon. Patrick
Reviewed by Annabel Sheila 4/19/2012 the way this unfolded, Andy....

Reviewed by Jon Willey 4/18/2012
to tell the truth your aim was quite bad but this work quite an entertaining arrow to the funny spot Andy - you wove this like silk and it shows your creativity for things humorous - write us another as soon as you've the time and inspiration - i'll gladly return for the enjoyment - i wish you love and peace my dear friend - Jon Michael
Reviewed by Vivian Dawson 4/18/2012
Vivid is your imagination!!!
for the truth You did tell!!!

Lady Vivian
Reviewed by Sheila Roy 4/18/2012
This is a fun, witty piece, Andy. I think you'd excel at writing Limericks too, because this poem reminds me of that style. Enjoyed!
Love and hugs,
Reviewed by Christine Tsen 4/18/2012
Sparkling in humor and hilarious sonic elements!
Super style!
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 4/18/2012
you are wicked, Mr Turner, wicked

Damn it, John already said that!
Reviewed by Asa Seeley 4/18/2012
enjoyed. thanks

Reviewed by John Flanagan 4/17/2012
Bad aim
You've shot her in the liver"

you are wicked, Mr Turner, wicked
indeed and i love your dry iconoclastic humour but more
than that your astute eye for human frailty

Reviewed by Morgan Merriweather 4/17/2012
well done!
Reviewed by Laura Fall 4/17/2012
Truly a fascinating tale Andy what an adventure indeed as always great poetry Laura
Reviewed by jude forese 4/17/2012
a good tale, Andy ... i enjoyed the journey through Robin's hood ;)
Reviewed by Regis Auffray 4/17/2012
Quite the tale, Andy... ...and cleverly told and shared. Thank you. Love and peace,


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