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Kenny J Baez

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4% Lycra
by Kenny J Baez

Friday, November 05, 2004
Not rated by the Author.
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Recent poems by Kenny J Baez
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           >> View all 245


I never had trousers like them;
they stretched for a night of love
or a dance at the salsa class.
Man, I felt like a Jet,
Rod Stewart in his spandex days:
Da Ya Think I'm Sexy?

I washed them,
I washed them in the machine,
and the label specifically said
Handwash only. They didn't shrink.
No, they got longer, they stretched
from here to eternity.

Only fit for a tall boy now,
a long drink of water
like Hans Christian Andersen;
only fit for a Danny Long Legs,
only fit for a stick insect,
a beanpole, an elongated chap:

talk about the King's new clothes!


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Reviewed by Shirley Houston 6/24/2012
I hate when that happens! Great write, poet!!
Reviewed by Regis Auffray 9/1/2009
I appreciate your wit and humour, Kenny. Thanks for the smiles. Love and peace to you,

Reviewed by Gene Williamson 11/29/2008
Thanks kj for this delightfully funny poem. Reminds me that Lincoln
said that a man's legs should be long enough to reach the round.
...and how come we haven't met before? -gene.
Reviewed by Larry Lounsbury 1/26/2007
This poem reminds me of the time I split my pants in elementary school, both funny and playful. Great poem
Reviewed by S J (Reader) 10/16/2006
This is boisterously entertaining! Love the title, "4% Lycra".
Wonderful poetry and expressions!

Thank you,
Reviewed by Unnur Bragadóttir 10/15/2006
My holy. What a wonderful poem filled with humor. Most beautiful trousers I´ve heard about and I have the feeling that a lot of people will "wear" them in future. You are 100 % and thank you so much for the comment you gave my poem. This is a wonderful place to stay in and a lot of good material to read.
Reviewed by Kate Burnside 11/6/2004
Haven't been able to bring myself to comment - laughing too much! The mind boggles, Ken, and this is soooo YOU!! Hope your houseguest is the Friendly-type and not the Selfish-kind... otherwise I don't envy you having to ask him to leave you some coco-pops for breakfast! LOL Kate xx
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