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AWOL Penny
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A Very Mild Flarf
by The Bear Paw
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Rated "G" by the Author.

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image from: http://www.artandculture.com/uploads/images/0011/2343/poster_perdu_flarf_lightbox.jpg



 

My first attempt at an
intentional "bad" poem.

 

His own flarf works
hearing from the sidelines
you see this in so many poets today
how much does a pound of flarf weigh
noise putty
tumbling the reason
bedazzling ridiculous
who was more not particularly good
informational incompetence
the irony of Flarf.


(c)Carolyn Red Bear 2009

 

Flarf is when you google random "bad writing" words and phrases
and use phrases from the search results to create a poem.
-------------


Flarf came about a couple of years ago when Gary Sullivan submitted a deliberately bad poem to Poetry.com, one of those vanity companies that lures the unsuspecting with lavish praise of their poetry and then offers to "publish" it for an exorbitant fee. Theorizing that no submission, no matter how heinous, would ever be treated with anything other than solicitous fawning, he sent in a poem titled "Mm-hmm":

Yeah, mm-hmm, it's true
big birds make
big doo! I got fire inside
my "huppa"-chimp(TM)
gonna be agreessive, greasy aw yeah god
wanna DOOT! DOOT!
Pffffffffffffffffffffffffft! hey!
oooh yeah baby gonna shake & bake then take
AWWWWWL your monee, honee (tee hee)
uggah duggah buggah biggah buggah muggah
hey! hey! you stoopid Mick! get
off the paddy field and git
me some chocolate Quik
put a Q-tip in it and stir it up sick
pocka-mocka-chocka-locka-DING DONG
fuck! shit! piss! oh it's so sad that
syndrome what's it called tourette's
make me HAI-EE! shout out loud
Cuz I love thee. Thank you God, for listening!

Sure enough, he received a full invitation to have his timeless piece of literature enshrined for all posterity, etc.

Gary shared his poem, the style of which he promptly dubbed "Flarf," with members of the Subpoetics mailing list, and before long a few other participants began posting poems to Poetry.com, including myself, Drew Gardner, Jordan Davis, and a handful of others. Eventually, we formed a separate mailing list.

info from http://epc.buffalo.edu/authors/bernstein/syllabi/readings/flarf.html
 

 

 


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Reviewed by OnepoetGem * 10/24/2009
It's easy to write a bad poem Bear, you did a good job, and this is an interesting piece, cheers
Reviewed by Jerry Bolton 10/18/2009
Haha! I guess that poetry site will always be around exploiting the desires of people who should know better, but are so wound up within themselves and their so-called poetry that they cannot see the trees for the forest. I'd never heard of Flarf, but I like it's concept.
Reviewed by Dawn Wilson 10/14/2009
What a word! Excellent job.
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 9/27/2009
Why I'll never fall for Poetry.com's scam again - holy smoke. Have written some bad poetry in my time, but Lord have mercy! Yours great, the other ... *rollling eyes* LMAO Love yours (and YOU).

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Reviewed by J'nia Fowler 9/27/2009
LOL. I suspected as much from these publishers of inane junk. Hugs, J'nia
Reviewed by Kate Clifford 8/11/2009
First time I heard of Flarf. Not surprising it finally happened :-)
Reviewed by MaryGrace Patterson 8/10/2009
Unique and different. I've never heard of FLARF till now.. A learning read....M
Reviewed by Annabel Sheila 7/23/2009
Hahaha....too funny! Flarf.....hmmn a very interesting concept. Ugh! Poetry.com.....Informative poem...thanks for sharing.

Anna
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 7/19/2009
Poetry.com doesn't even deserve an honorable mention...

Ron
Reviewed by Kate Burnside 7/18/2009
GREAT word... almost onomatopaeic and very deliberately (I suppose!) gas-like!!!!! At least a saving grace would be to KNOW that your poetry is bad, rather than being self-delusional about its relative literary merits. I do wonder whether any of us EVER guage our own estimations correctly... I would think most of us either have a too low opinion of our writing, or conversely, too high. Thanks for posting this! It gives me heart... and flarf!!!! :)))))))))))) xx
Reviewed by Lori Moore 7/17/2009
You flarf well. Enjoyed.
Reviewed by Gene Williamson 7/17/2009
Flarf away, Bear. I love this and you and Gary Sullivan's poem.
I did the same thing a few years ago, as a lark, but yanked the
poem before it could be published. -gene.
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 7/17/2009
I kind of like Gary's poem; maybe it is 'a timeless piece of literature!' Flarf On!
Reviewed by ~ H (Reader) 7/17/2009
Full of expression, that's for sure, Holly
Reviewed by Paul D Berube 7/17/2009
Interesting piece.
Reviewed by Patrick Granfors 7/16/2009
What a fantastic find to keep idiots like me humble. I actually like it. Patrick
Reviewed by Karen Palumbo 7/16/2009
Very entertaining and a hoot of a piece...

Be always safe,
Karen
Reviewed by John Flanagan 7/16/2009
Carolyn,
Excellent!
John
Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan 7/16/2009
very funny!
Reviewed by Regis Auffray 7/16/2009
Points well-made and well received, Carolyn. Thank you. Love and best wishes,

Regis
Reviewed by JASMIN HORST SEILER 7/16/2009
The king with no cloth on, what's wrong with this poem Bear, I think it's extrememly creative, mind you so is yours ha, keep on flarfen.
Hugs! Jasmin Horst
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 7/16/2009
LOLOLOL at Georg below; too funny! LOLOLOLOL

And, Bear, this poem is a delight; thank you for making me smile! Well done; brava!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :D *giggles*
Reviewed by Georg Mateos 7/16/2009
Every time I eat big Mexican beans I tend to flarf a lot.

Windy Warrior








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