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iF I HAd A taIL
by A PAX

Friday, April 16, 2004
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Animals are my friends... and I don't eat my friends. George Bernard Shaw


~~~~IF I HAD A TAIL~~~~

I wonder why people are born without tails
Antlers or horns, webbed feet or scales
Feathers and wings could be wonderful things
Blow holes, and spikes....or feet that could cling!

Seems like the animals have got it all
From  biggest of whales, to  humming birds small
Somehow I feel like I've been gypped
When I see how the animals come so equipped!!!


If I had a beak, I would feel so unique
 I'd chirp and I'd sing, when they asked me to speak
And I'd puff up my feathers, in the coldest of weathers
And huddle together with birds of a feather

If I was someplace I'd rather not be
I'd spit out my blowhole, and swim out to sea
Life would be simple if I had a pouch
I could nap anytime....curling up in my couch!!

Now, if I had two sets of matching hooves
I'd moo me a tune and get in the groove
I'd sway with my trunk, as I danced to some funk
And make the earth shake, as I jiggled my hunks!

I'd giggle and laugh, if I were a giraffe
Increasing my height, by more than just half
I could have my own special casing or shell
Or a way to grow round, like a blowfish that swells


If I had a mane, I would never complain
If ignored, I would roar, like a king in his rein
I'd show them my paws, and say THAT'S THE LAST STRAW
 I'm the king, NOT a boar, and this is MY law!

I'd frighten the rabble, with a shake of my rattle
Then squawk, like a hawk, with nonsense & prattle
I'd bark, in the dark at the sight of the moon
Then swing from some vines, like a happy baboon!

Oh if I had these things, and the giggles they'd bring
I'd feel just as new, as the first day of spring
I'd be so unique, and incredibely sleek
And I'd purr in my fur, when I wanted to speak

GRRRRRRRRRRR

 

meow

I've recently gone vegatarian.

 

~~A aka GG~~

 



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Reviewed by Kate Burnside 4/18/2004
This is, literally, so wild and upbeat and quite the best - ummm, opposite of anthropomorphism... OK, then, animalisation that I have read in ions. Just love all the attitude and so sassy! A very smart write, Anita and hugely enjoyed - thankyou! KB
Reviewed by Regis Auffray 4/17/2004
Anita, this is great! Thank you. Love and peace to you. Regis
Reviewed by jude forese 4/17/2004
i can see those veggies have had a good impact ;) your sense of humor is just divine ...
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 4/17/2004
Delightful piece Anita!!

Love tinka
Reviewed by Jack Roberts 4/16/2004
LOL Well done Lady A!! Personally, I'm glad you are you!! : )

Jack
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 4/16/2004
i'd hate to hear THAT lion BARK! LOL Boy, that is SOME SERIOUS "DOG" here, folks! LOL If I saw a dog that looked like that, I'd run faster than the speed of sound tryin' like HELL to get the F*** away! LOL

Fun write; thanks for sharing! LOL

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :D
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 4/16/2004
(((anita)))

LOL--o, that pic--bet that "dog" has one hell of a bark LOL

adored this whimsical, adorable write--well done!

(((HUGS))) and love, karla.
Reviewed by Robert Montesino 4/16/2004
Delightful & wonderfully light-hearted write! Bravo to you!
Reviewed by *********** ********** (Reader) 4/16/2004
Anita.....you do humour so well...actually, you just plain write so very well!

This was fantastic.....I loved every minute of the read....You are in your element here..

Gutter Girl? Hmmmmmm I still dunno…lol

Loved it…ty, Dani
Reviewed by E T Waldron 4/16/2004
You better have a book AakaGG with a name like that it's sure to be a big hit;-) I love it! You really are incomparrable in this genre!
Reviewed by Floria Kelderhouse (Reader) 4/16/2004
Hahahaha this is so great...I am thinking of
doing the same thing..I think perhaps it is
better for us...dont know if I can..I loved this
great writing Anita...floria
Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader) 4/16/2004
Great poem but I don't know, having all those traits of animals, wouldn't that bring on fleas? LOL
Reviewed by Al Swanson (Reader) 4/16/2004
hi Gutter Girl, I like that name by the way, seems homey, hehe

this was such a nice light and playful poem, I just really enjoyed it allot, with the different advantages of animal hood being displayed for us in playful fashion, a nice lift me up poem ty Al
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