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Iolanthe Woulff

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Member Since: May, 2010

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· She's My Dad

· A British Petroleum Afternoon

· Mom-in-Law

· That P Word

· Organized Religion

· So Long, Mr. Hot Pants

· Slough of Despond

· Malibu Majesty

· Lament for Eden

· The Faithbug

· Rain of Toxic Terror

         More poetry...

Iolanthe Woulff, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

  Small Town Visitor
by Iolanthe Woulff
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Iolanthe Woulff
•  Purple Pickles
•  La Vieja Loca
•  The Bug
•  The Callous Sophisticate
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           >> View all 56

This is a re-post of an earlier poem. (I'd used up my allotted space, and had to take it down.) Anyway, it's a fanciful "I wish" tale of revenge... or just deserts, depending on your viewpoint.

The Corporate Rural Development Man

came to our little town this morn

in a car as large

as a garbage barge,

and began to thus tootle his horn:


"Howdy-do, you good people of Tinyville!

What a lovely li'l place y'got here.

I just wanted to say

all your fears please allay;

from this old boy you've nothing to fear."


He took off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves,

and he offered cigars to the guys.

"And now, let's get down

to improving your town,"

stated he, blinking pigulent eyes.


He gestured in scorn at the grassy town square

with it's statue of our local hero:

"Wasted space, you must see,

is sheer idiocy,

and adds up to a balance of zero."


But we'll build you a strip mall by June or July;

incidentally, I bought all the land."

He chortled with glee:

"Put your trust, folks, in me;

we'll develop this dump hand-in-hand!"


"Now, we're bulldozing out the old Applegate farm,

and the widow McPherson's, as well.

Got a quick-money slant

on a rendering plant,

and I've heard you get used to the smell."


He told us our theater would soon be torn down,

and a Burger King raised in its stead;

while the Michelin Man

would hawk tires on plan

once the church was demolished, he said.


But we like our town just as it is,

we protested; at which the developer roared:

"Do you think I would nix

all this progress, you hicks?!

Hell, the drawings are all on the board."


So saying, he tossed his cigar in the street

and he sauntered away to his car.

But I'm happy to state

he left town a bit late:

on a rail, dressed in feathers and tar.



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Reviewed by pat medlin 6/30/2010
HAH!...GEEEZLOISE...HIZZZZZZTERICAL! as co director of the planning/development department ...(small town suburb of atlanta)...would love to see this published in the county's newspaper...marietta daily jpurnal (MDJ)....

thanks for this delightful read...AM PRINTING IT OUT...FRAMING... MOUNTING ON MY DOOR!...'Warning!... Required Reading For All Visiting Developers'

which makes me wonder....were/are you involved with planning/development of some municipality?

Books by
Iolanthe Woulff

She's My Dad

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Kindle, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, more..

  1. Wolf at the Door
  2. morning gesture
  3. A women's day poem
  4. past encounter
  5. I Sprung
  6. The Garden of Death
  7. Watch What You Say
  8. imaginable possibility
  9. Ahhh . . . Thinking About Things
  10. Mankind
  11. The Fighter
  12. His Life
  13. My Failings
  14. synchronized
  15. Afterglow
  16. I'll Be Doing It Until I Die
  17. Drowning....but making it.
  18. Bedlam in Thibodaux
  19. A Woman
  20. Casualties

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