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Iolanthe Woulff

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Member Since: May, 2010

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· She's My Dad

· A British Petroleum Afternoon

· Mom-in-Law

· That P Word

· Organized Religion

· So Long, Mr. Hot Pants

· Slough of Despond

· Malibu Majesty

· Lament for Eden

· The Faithbug

· Rain of Toxic Terror

         More poetry...

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Books by Iolanthe Woulff
  Pity Party
by Iolanthe Woulff
Sunday, July 04, 2010
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Iolanthe Woulff
•  Purple Pickles
•  La Vieja Loca
•  The Bug
•  The Callous Sophisticate
•  The Web
           >> View all 56

One too many afternoon yack shows, a bit of hair-tearing, and this was the result.

I am a Victim

of everything

and everyone.

I went to see

Swami Bungus Kapreesh

(that Oprah guru who

stays centered by

sleeping on nails)

he said I was

spiritually destitute



How kewl is that?

And it's all

Dad's fault for being an abusive jerk,

Mom's fault for being addicted to face-lifts,

my brother's fault for being such a queen,

my sister's fault for being a size 2,

my school's fault for being too strict,

America's fault for being too racist,

TV's fault for being too moronic,

The President’s fault for being a loser,

and your fault because

you sabotage my self-esteem

by thinking I'm

 an idiot.

Is it any wonder

I am so damaged,

I only have eight thousand friends

 on Facebook??





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Reviewed by Sage Sweetwater 7/4/2010
And blame it on Rio, the thong's stuck in the crack giving it face value! Dr. Phil has a pair of cure-all tweezers to pluck the sand rim...Parody of today's what is reality TV blame it on Jeopardy, Pity Party the Daily Double...if there was a category for Iolanthe Woulff, I would run the board, I have studied well...

Reviewed by m j hollingshead 7/4/2010
well done
Reviewed by D Johnson 7/4/2010
And here all along I was thinking that I was doing good to have a few friends on FB, and btw, do people still watch daytime tv? Really a cute little write, right?

Cheers and have a happy fourth,
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