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  Home > Humor > Poetry
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Tom Hyland

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Member Since: Feb, 2003

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Books
· The New Jerusalem - Chapters 1 - 5

· Bawlmer, Merlyn - Home of The Hons


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· CHICKEN SCRATCHES ?

· DADDY ... ADDENDUM

· DADDY, WHAT DID YOU DO IN THE MILITARY?

· THREE LITTLE ... EDS !

· ALL MY CARS - PART 2

· ALL MY CARS

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· THE BIG LUG !


Articles
· 9 / 11 : PRESS For TRUTH

· NEW WORDS WITH FRIENDS

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· Delegate or Stagnate

· THE PARTY OF NO - PART DOS !

· sick - sicK - SICK !

· Is Life Just an Impulse ?

· BGE Sucks !

· THE END !


Poetry
· SHRIMPY

· OF ALL THE GIRLS I LOVED BEFORE ...

· ALL HALLOWS EVE

· HONEY, OUR VOWS MEANT NOTHING TO YOU ... BUT I DIDN'T KNOW

· CONTEMPLATING BAMBIíS NAVEL

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· COURAGE

· AS FOR ME ...

· LIFE IS LIKE ... A BOOK

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  Cut To The Chase
by Tom Hyland
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Rated "R" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Tom Hyland
•  SHRIMPY
•  OF ALL THE GIRLS I LOVED BEFORE ...
•  ALL HALLOWS EVE
•  HONEY, OUR VOWS MEANT NOTHING TO YOU ... BUT I DIDN'T KNOW
•  CONTEMPLATING BAMBIíS NAVEL
           >> View all 514




Yeah, I know - Weird Is, as Weird Does!

But don't report me, to the FUZZ!

Maybe I'm Crazy, a tad Maniacal,

But Gonadatropins Stimulate the Follicle!

http://www.vivo.colostate.edu/hbooks/pathphys/endocrine/hypopit/lhfsh.html

In short, I have Gargantuan Gonads!





Cut To The Chase

Copyright: 02-12-08 - Tom Hyland


We Are Born! We Live! We Die!
Thatís It! Full Circle!
Done! Finito!
TAPS!


Some Live A Long Life - Some Donít!
Some Get Richer - Some Get Poorer!
Some Become Nuns - Vows Of Chastity,
Others Poke Anything - Real Whorers!


Some Get An Education - Book Larniní
Others Stay Stupid - And Happy!
Some Write Prolific Prose,
Others Stuffís - Just Sappy!


Some Are Healthy -
Live To Ninety-Eight!
Others Overdo Obesity,
Are Early At The Pearly Gate!


Some Make Love.
Others Make War.
Some Are Sweet.
Others - Rotten To The Core!


Some Are Clean.
Others Stink!
Some Are Mean.
Some Swim - Others Sink!


Some Are Artistic.
Others Not!
Some Are Ugly.
Others - Hot!


Some Eat Meat!
Others Donít!
Some Always Will!
Others Never Wonít!


Some Are Hard Workers.
Others Are Bums!
Some Live In Mansions.
Others Live In Slums!


A Select Few Are Leaders.
Rise To The Top!
The Masses Of Classes,
Frolic In The Slop!


What Is Our Purpose,
In This Thing Called Life?
Is It To Sally Forth,
And Persist Through Strife?


Some Are Really Lucky,
Great Sense Of Humor,
Others Are Less Fortunate,
Or Is That Just A Rumor?


Try As We May,
Try As We Might,
Thereís Always A Struggle,
Always A Fight!


Mind Your Own Business,
Stay Out Of Trouble,
Oops! Another War,
Just Busted The Bubble!


Weíve All Heard The Story,
ĎBout The Birds And The Bees,
But Still We Scurry Like Ants,
Dotting Iís And Crossing Tís!


Some Are Venusians,
Get Beauty Out Of Jars,
Others Are Macho-Men,
Who Come From Mars!


Why Canít We Get Along?
Why So Much Fuss And Ado?
Are We Just Animals,
And Belong In A Zoo?


I Have No Answers,
A Word To The Wise -
A Hug - A Squeeze - A Kiss
Tell Me No Lies!


We Are Born! We Live! We Die!
Thatís It! Full Circle!
Done! Finito!
CRAPS!



In The Famous Words
Of Allen Funt -

ďSmile, Youíre On Candid Camera!í

- AND -


"When people are smiling they are most receptive to almost anything you want to teach them."



:) :) :) :) :) :) :)


TOMKAT


††



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Reviewed by Regis Auffray 2/19/2008
Thank you for sharing your perspective via your wit and humor, Tom. Love and peace to you,

Regis
Reviewed by Rebecca Lerwill 2/12/2008
I loooove this, man! Right ON.
Becca~
Reviewed by Jackie (Micke) Jinks 2/12/2008
Oh, Tom...you are on a spin! You had me laughing all the way - but there is a message in this, too, methinks. Maybe, laughing is the only way out? Enjoyed.

Micke
Reviewed by Andre Bendavi ben-YEHU 2/12/2008

Outstanding unique composition... Every line in it is bountiful to feed the mind, but I think that stanza sixteen bears a great message:
---------------------/
"Some Are Venusians,
Get Beauty Out Of Jars,
Others Are Macho-Men,
Who Come From Mars!"
--------------------/

Thank You for sharing this wise-wonder.

In admiration,

Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU
Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor (Reader) 2/12/2008
And supposedly we all came out of the same gene pool.
Good rant. But as long as man is on the planet, there will never be peace. Compromise is a dirty word to many.

Elizabeth

Books by
Tom Hyland



Bawlmer, Merlyn - Home of The Hons

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