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  Home > Humor > Poetry
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Paddy Bostock

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Member Since: Jul, 2012

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Poetry
· In the deathlight (also a song)

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· The Love At The Centre (also a song)

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· Living Free (Also a Song)

· Spaghetti Man (Also a Song)

· Long Road (also a song).

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Books by Paddy Bostock
  Bertha (Also a song)
by Paddy Bostock
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Paddy Bostock
•  The Old Ones
•  Spaghetti Man (Also a Song)
•  Living Free (Also a Song)
•  In the War (also a song)
•  Little Daughter Girl (Also a song)
           >> View all 20


Happy couples come in all shapes and sizes.


Her hair is the texture of new-mown hay,
Her nose is pocked and bulbous and tinged with grey,
She's irascible, depressive and hard to understand,
And some people say she should have been a man.
But nobody knows my Bertha like I do.

Her eyes transmit the venom of a rattlesnake,

Her lips are puce and pouting and probably fake,

She has the sense of humour of a giggling grave,

And some people say she'll never be saved.

But nobody knows my Bertha like I do.

She used to play at right back for the WRAF,
Her favourite thing was jumping up and down on the ref,

She's built like a mountain with muscles on her teeth,

And some people say she should be in the police.

But nobody knows my Bertha like I do.

She's a union official who votes for the right,
She used to be a Nazi before she saw the light,

She loves to wear a uniform with highly polished wellies,

And some people say now they know where hell is.

But nobody knows my Bertha like I do.

For I need to have my Bertha to help me through life,
I'm such a shrinking violet I need a tough wife,
She's protective and aggressive and never lets me down,
And though some people say I'm a weak-kneed clown,
Nobody knows me like my Bertha does. 

PLEASE VISIT MY WINGS e-PRESS PAGE HERE. 


SONG VERSION


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Reviewed by Regis Auffray 10/21/2012
You are classic, Paddy; you make me think of olden days when poets worked at their "stuff." I do not. I am spoiled at times with inspiration, and I admit, I do even edit. Your poetry is fine to me, Paddy; I wish that meant something. Love and best wishes,

Regis
Reviewed by Connie Faust 9/13/2012
This is such a fun song, and truly, Bertha sounds just right! I really enjoyed your humor.

Connie
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