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Kate Burnside

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Member Since: Feb, 2004

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Amniotic Waters (Thank you Aberjhani!)
by Kate Burnside

Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Rated "PG13" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Kate Burnside
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... Knee-jerk poem inspired by Aberjhani's awesome lines from his American Widow: Song for Coretta Scott King poem. Have just been in today and "tweaked it" ever so slightly!! LOL K xx PS Thanks for all love and prayers: much needed! :))


AMNIOTIC WATERS


“swimming bare-skinned in the waters of each others’
freedom-hungry minds” - Aberjhani


Swimming together naked in amnion,
pre-birth, post-partum –
a timeless continuum;

bathing in freedom,
wallowing in understanding,
drenched in total knowing.

In secret sacred pools
nothing can separate:
each droplet and ripple
conspires to unite,

breathed simultaneously
through billowing spirit gills;
exhaled as bubbles of soul.


  

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Reviewed by Axilea MU 11/10/2007
I am deeply in love with the sea, water is a favorite element.
You take the reader to such a mysterious, yet familiar place,
back to the past and what makes our future.
I love the primeval bubble that your poem creates.
(funny, I have a poem where I used "a sacred secret", I don't know which one it was anymore :-)).

I really loved this piece of poetry.

Axilea
Reviewed by The Smoking Poet 3/14/2006
And so the reader breathes simultaneously with the poet.
Reviewed by Carmen Ruggero 2/9/2006
I wouldn't touch this 'rough draft'. It is poetic perfection.

Carmen
Reviewed by Dale Clark 2/9/2006
Outstanding! Truly powerful.
Reviewed by Janet Parker 2/9/2006
Larger than life in a few words. Beautiful, Kate.
Reviewed by Paul Williams 2/8/2006
This is profoundly beautiful Kate, rough draft or no, and what an inspiriation, a superb piece.

Paul;-)
Reviewed by Sage Sweetwater 2/8/2006
Yoni-like--->rock formations cave worship, crawling through the aperture and crawl back out again in an imitiation of divine rebirth, the entry and return from the celestial womb. This is so resonant of the womb-grave of the Neolithic burial mound at Byrn Celli Ddu, Wales. It also is worthy crossover of a sexuality hymn, in Sumerian vernacular, the cuneiform for "woman" interpreted as a pubic triangle. Including the analogy between the reproductive body of the female and the reproductive body of earth to accomodate fresh knowledge of the seasons, the yearly, cyclical process of sowing and harvesting crops, a place of new life, also a cultural perogative of spawning new children. Lastly the Amniotic Waters forming the Ocean from her blood. A journey into gestation, you nourish us with a fertile mind, Kate.

Sage
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 2/8/2006
Wow...you are so good at this poetry thingy...SHakespear watchit Kate is coming!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie 2/8/2006
Absolutely beautiful, if this is a rought draft, I can't wait to see the final version. outstanding. Loved this:

bathing in freedom,
wallowing in understanding,
drenched in total knowing.

In secret sacred pools
nothing can separate:
each droplet and ripple
conspire to unite,

deeply moving poetry,

Reindeer
Reviewed by J M 2/8/2006
This is refreshing I like the muse you captured for this rebirthing poem of freedom Kate wonderful work!!!!!
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 2/7/2006
Kate, dear Kate,

For a "rough" draft, this is pretty darn good! I'd love to see the finished product, but for a first attempt, this is awesome! You rock, girl! BRAVA!!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in America, Karen Lynn in Texas. :D

Prayers still with your mum and you; keep my daddy in yours. He has pneumonia. He was supposed to have his surgery yesterday, but docs found mild pneumonia in his lungs, so they postponed surgery. They will do it when the pneumonia is gone. They are giving him i.v. antibiotics and probably oxygen. Will keep you up to date; stay "tooned"~ :)
Reviewed by Dawn Richerson 2/7/2006
I'm in love with your first draft, Kate, and particularly taken by stanza 2. Aberjhani's poem was one incredible piece and I can't imagine a more beautiful response. Dawn
Reviewed by alejapoet@aol.com Bennett 2/7/2006
Freedom, flying, a sense of peace no matter what come what may that is what I got out of reading such written expressions.
Reviewed by E T Waldron 2/7/2006
Your poetry schooling shows in your telling us this is a first draft!;-) For the rest of us this would be nirvana!;-) Simply superb Kate!

Eileen^
Reviewed by Nordette Adams 2/7/2006
A beautifully stunning and outstanding piece of work, Kate. "spirit gills" I like that. Coretta and Martin inspired and inspire the world.

On a literary note, boy, that Aberjhani is some kind of muse. We should write a book about him. :-)~~Nordette
Reviewed by Sherry Heim 2/7/2006
A rough draft???? Surely you jest, Kate!! This is fabulous as is _Aberjhani's beautiful poem. If _A is not flattered by such a skilled tributive write, I would be more than surprised. Two great authors, you both are and perhaps you might consider a collaboration, if, indeed, both of you do those. Anyway...your work here is nothing short of wonderful, Kate...I have no idea how to improve upon perfection.
Take care,
Sherry
Reviewed by F William Broome 2/7/2006
As the Kings knew, freedom is in language and haveiong the courage to use it effectively. Today, we honor each of them, again, closing a major chapter in the freedom gaining march of mankind. The contimeporary struggle allows us to realize how far we've come since 90% of earth's inhabitants were slaves. Kate, your effective words open new understnding of the ongoing drive of human beings to be TOTALLY FREE ! ! ...We're almost there.....-Bill
Reviewed by jude forese 2/7/2006
wonderful sense of union and to the movement of free individuals combined as a collective soul ...
Reviewed by Felix Perry 2/7/2006
I love this sweet Kate and feel like I'd like to jump right in and test the waters with you. I do not know anything about total knowing I only believe knowing comes from doing and living which in a way is like swimming through life as you say.

Felix
Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader) 2/7/2006
The poetic form and language is great.
But, for an idiot like me I need someone to translate.
Reviewed by Kathy Kubik 2/7/2006
Wonderful, wonderful.

Be well,

Kathy
Reviewed by Peter Paton 2/7/2006
You have added your own unique style and substance to this adaption of Aberjhani's work Kate !
Given the nature and content of your own labour, I reckon it is as good as it gets !
Peter
Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor (Reader) 2/7/2006
Beautifully done, Kate. And the touch is passed on.
Reviewed by Aberjhani 2/7/2006
I read these lines and felt tears slipping down the faces of the souls of MLK and Coretta Scott-King. No thanks are due to me for these profoundly exquisite lines. It's because of their courage and loving vision of and for humanity that my pen sings as loudly (even if sometimes out of tune) and freely (even if to the point of embarrassing others) as it does. Thank you Extraordinary Poet for the light you continue to gather and shine for us all.
Aberjhani
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 2/7/2006
Kate,

For a "first draft," this is GORGEOUS!

Although I love the entire write, the second stanza,

"...bathing in freedom;
wallowing in understanding,
drenched in total knowing. ..." <-----------deeeeeeeeeep, thought provoking excellence!

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.



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