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Rusty Daily

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Member Since: Oct, 2006

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Monkey Bones
by Rusty Daily
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Rated "PG" by the Author.
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           >> View all 145


God and Jesus were hanging out
on a cumulus one day
looking down at earth.
God had his head in his hands,
dejected, wondering why
so many humans misunderstood him.


The earth was pretty much a mess,
what with all the murders, rapes,
theft, gluttony, greed and, oh yea,
smarmy televangelist.


God said, "JC, I donít understand
these ungrateful humans.
After all Iíve given them,
air, water, oil, lots of dirt,
animals to kill "for food",
airplanes, computers.
post-it-notes and MP3s. I donít get it."


JC hesitantly answered,
"Dad, I know youíre all powerful
and you went to a lot of work
to make the heavens and earth
but you have no marketing skills."


To which God said, "Whaddaya mean?
I gave them a garden, but no,
that wasnít good enough.
I gave them ten pretty good
guidelines to live by.
When they got in trouble
I poked old Rameses ll in the eye
pretty good too.
And above all, I gave them you."


"First off Dad," JC responded,
"That Garden of Eden stuff
is pretty outlandish,
especially after you leave all those
Monkey Man bones laying around.
Not to mention those dinosaur bones.
Good Lord Dad, get real"
(Donít cuss son, I mean it)
"Sorry. But look Dad; Commandments?
Since when did a human
like to be told what to do?
You should know, you made them.
Perhaps you could have called them
The Ten Pretty Good Suggestions.?


"Now I know you had me
die on the cross for their sins,
for which I donít hold a grudge,
but a Virginal Birth? Walking on water?
Raising the dead? Water to Wine?
Feeding five thousand people?
What were you thinking?"


"And speaking of my birth and death.
Look what they did with it. Rudolph,
a Fat Man and a Rabbit.
Now that, is marketing."


To which God said,
"You want me to be like a,
what did you call it,
a smarmy televangelist?"


Jesus put his arms around his Dad
and said, "No Dad,
I love you too much for that.
But, you do need to get rid
of all those Monkey Bones."


 


 


 



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Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 11/22/2006
You are a star...now that is one COOL father son talk.....just got to love it!!

Cool man!!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by E T Waldron 11/21/2006
Rusty this is positively top notch! You have to know Him to write this way about Him!Kudo's!

ET;-)
Reviewed by Victor Buhagiar (Reader) 11/21/2006
Quite a dig against humanity. I like the idea of the ten commandments being just suggestions. Show us for what we are in a comical way. Victor
Reviewed by Kimmy Van Kooten 11/21/2006
Oh dear This was hilariously creative...if there even is a word...yeah, Get rid of the Monkey Bones!...that outta do it!
I just left a message regarding marketing skills and how one title, of such...I won't say...gets 147 hits in two days were Patriotism and Spirituality run far behind, like 20 in two months!
Love and Peace~
Kimmy~
Reviewed by CJ Heck 11/21/2006
A wonderful tongue-in-cheek poem, Rusty-friend! You continually amaze me. This is another enjoyable trek through your gifted imagination.
Loveya,
CJ
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