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Axilea MU

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Disclosing Lost Shadows
by Axilea MU
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Axilea MU
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           >> View all 270

There were lines on my wall
                dark on whitewash
places of a summer within,
with the mesmerizing call of the sea

Imperceptible movement
wind, words, shutters
their shadows the lines on a page
           where whispers could rest

Then I thought of what could break
the dream of forever dreaming
the cycle that never ends --
I thought
what could have been
what could have been written
                   between the lines

Begonias, bougainvillea
there were reds and a deep mauve
balconies open to receive

My sun kissed hands
my chin and breathing skin
ready to ask, turned to the sky

And then I fought
the shadows on the white wall
where the colors disappeared --
and fought
what they could have done
what they could have revealed
the light that comes
through the lines of my darkness,
                  of my darkest dreams

Veiled or laid bare
still, accepted somehow
the broken dreams,
the segments, symptoms
endless ribbon-like chimera;
those true shadows of reality.

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Reviewed by Sandi Schraut 4/9/2010
The pictures painted in my mind were beautiful! Wonderful job!
Reviewed by Sheila Roy 4/5/2010
I like the never-changing sense of possibilities here. And reality, always looming. Great flow, too.
Reviewed by m j hollingshead 3/23/2010
enjoyed the read
Reviewed by Salman Ali 3/5/2010
how many people have heard mesmerising call of the sea??!! how many people have lived in the dream of forever dreaming??!! how many people's balconies open on the knocking of subtle fragrances of flowers??!! I'm glad you are still willing to hold onto the dreams, no matter if they are broken. Whether they are shadows of reality or whether reality is shadow of dreams, will always be arguable though.
Reviewed by Holly Ibbitson (Reader) 3/2/2010
Oh my goodness, how refeshing to read you once again! Blessings, Holly
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 2/27/2010
Reminds me of California and dreams which come too quickly now to my sleep deprived mind in the light of day on a sunlit wall.

Reviewed by Michelle Mead 2/25/2010
Great title, very fitting- I loved your choice of descriptive words, and felt like i was in an old New England house by the beach. Lovely.
Reviewed by Regis Auffray 2/24/2010
The powerful imagery and the symbols used throughout your most meaningful poem serve to enhance the reader's experience, Axilea. Thank you for sharing this gift. Love and best wishes,

Reviewed by Liana Margiva 2/24/2010
EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Liana Margiva
Reviewed by Elizabeth Price 2/23/2010
Really hooked me and kept me enchanted throughout. Loved the dreams, crushed by reality, not so good but like you said, reality. Love it. Liz
Reviewed by Kate Burnside 2/22/2010
Fabulous title which amplifies the content and meaning of your poem wonderfully. I would have loved to have written this, Axilea: it's just my sort of intellectual and emotional territory - or at least, very similar to the ways in which my mind works, though my modes of expression may be different. I love that you use such clarity of form and diction to give character to your wall's shadows... all that they say and all that they omit. Although you work with abstracts of thought, your clear-eyed focus and precision of expression resonates. You are a very visual artist. xx
Reviewed by George Carroll 2/22/2010
Splendid poetry like a wave that builds up in the readers mind seeking the shore of contentment.
Reviewed by Charlie 2/21/2010
Ahh, alliteration! I fell into it and almost drowned, but you brought me back up with that last word, that somehow rounded out the poem with the exact right number of syllables and sounds.

I also liked the reoccurring one-word passages by threes that each gave new insight. They made me focus on the words rather than the imagery-- an odd consequence that turned out to my phoneme-savoring favor.

But most of all, I love the subject matter. specific wording in the last bit leads me to think of DNA strands and segments strewn around-- living creatures in your mind that will out eventually. I bet they're beautiful. --Charlie
Reviewed by Amber Moonstone 2/21/2010
Deeply moving poetry Axilea, everyone seems to be writing about dreams these days..
Nicely done.
Peace, love, and light,
Amber "V"
Reviewed by John Flanagan 2/21/2010
You lose and find yourself eloquently, intelligently, deeply, Axilea,
through a sustained motif, the black and white of memory and then the colours of renewal, progress and acceptance.

Reviewed by Esteban Martinez 2/21/2010
I like this - muy bien!

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