|Reviewed by Rafika Anderson (Reader)
|"Steal not the intimacy" absolutely captured my heart. Perfect opening line for a piece on trust and betrayal.|
|Reviewed by Amor Sabor
|There is no shortage of vanity stricken characters who ply the waters of thievery. Excellent expression, Axilea
|Reviewed by Christine Tsen
|Everything about this is an awe-inspiring masterpiece right down to the title!
|Reviewed by Mary Ann Biddinger
|Excellently captured watercolors of emotions Alexia.
Lady Mary Ann
|Reviewed by D. Vegas
|Axilea, I will have to use Christine's words," You blow me away. "
|Reviewed by Christine Alwin
|Brilliantly written, word play blows me away..the message is loud and clear..soaking it up!|
|Reviewed by Sheila Roy
|I love your approach here, Axilea. Original and true! Verse 2 made me feel sad, and left me wondering if ever my desk will collect dust and my pens will run dry from abandonment. Enjoyed.
|Reviewed by John Flanagan
|i see in the context of the theme 'inconspicuous'
is perfectly right to modify 'tragedy' ...storm
in a teacup scenario; in the 'bigger picture' of the
world vanity is the shallowness that tempts the empty
once again, Axilea, you're there and you know
|Reviewed by Jon Willey
|we are the whole of us, mankind, victims of self-esteem that far exceeds our innate abilities - how wonderfully you tell this story that intrigues the imagination - love stories ending in tragedy are always doomed by vanity - your poem entertains and educates with perspective Axilia - I wish you love and peace my dear friend - Jon Michael|
|Reviewed by Patrick Granfors
|You're so vain...I bet you think this poem is about you;-) Patrick|
|Reviewed by Ronald Hull
|You have a wonderful way of expressing emotions. In this case, stolen love never returned.
|Reviewed by jude forese
|vanity is the destructive machine of mankind ... though i have to say, sometimes the vehicle of vanity is the reflection of justifiable self-esteem ...
as always, uniquely clever imagery and motif ...
|Reviewed by Lily of Lough Neagh C. Dennis-Woosley
|How sad that another due to their own arrogance could possibly think that would work. Excellent write, gives others something to think about.
Love and Light
|Reviewed by Jerry Bolton
|Vanity. Stupid should be said in the same breath.|
|Reviewed by Paul Judges
|Very good, Axilea|
|Reviewed by Douglas Bentley
|Very cleverly written
The rest of my review was stolen!
|Reviewed by RWE SAYS BYE
|winning close to the mark here would press the noblesse oblige of an homage due to your vanity were I to tell how much these lines mean to me... elegant, clean, refined, sophisticated and super-subtle edge close to the perimeter of the passions outlined in this winsome, gambit... I feel the need to counter... watch out...|
|Reviewed by Charlie
|I'm imagining the Deus ex Machina as The Cat in the Hat in his little put-it-backer machine (squeak, clank, whirr). And just what would he put back? No, here there's mystery-- nameless mystery, and somehow less loneliness, I think, than if things were put back to rites (I didn't say "rights").
The poem builds from the first strophe, which is full of V's (vain, vases, invasion, vanity) and feels sort of barren. The second has some repeting vowel sounds and rhymes (O's and w's, desk-rest-test) and has some visual imagery in pastels of yellows and rust--feels less barren than sort of dumpy. In the end strophe, is the climax--knife scratching enamel smiles and storms and floods, subtly woven throughout that part are the softer n's, m's cutting short hissing s's, culminating in "silence..." It winds down at that point with what feels like an emptying stage-- actors limping away, and the reader/theater feeling the gutteral effects of the play (on words)--(c's in hocus-pocus, ex machina, can, cover, inconspicuous). V ends the poem again, but it's an empty victory.
The pic you posted is perfect for the piece, sets the perfect tone. Hope to read more of you soon. --Charlie