The Ice Pick Widow
She came to my office one day
Five miles on her roller blades
Her car’d been repossessed
And she was, to say the least, distressed
Been married just three years
Blessed with two fine kids
When her husband headed for the hills
Leaving her with a pile of unpaid bills
Now Maureen was a teacher
Her salary not that great
So, when it came time to pay the rent
All her money had been spent
I suggested she file bankruptcy
But she said, "Wait, that’s not all.
My husband didn’t pay IRS
And now I’m really in a mess."
I sighed, bankruptcy was out
Then told her not to worry,
Just give me a day or two
To figure out what we could do
She shook her head, clinched a fist
"The bastard’s got a girlfriend," she spat.
With daggers in her dark green eyes
"You know, I hope the bastard dies!"
"He does have lots of insurance," she mused
"Two hundred grand or more, and
"He’d be worth much more to me if he were dead!"
"No! No! Purge that idea from your head!" I said.
She looked at me and smiled,
"Of course it’s just an idle thought
I love him, I’d never want him harmed
So, you needn’t be alarmed."
She left, I told her I’d call her back
When I’d come up with a strategy
To deal with her impending doom
She nodded, but her yes showed only gloom
Several days later she called me late at night
She’d been arrested and taken to the county jail
Her beloved Rodney, he’d been found dead
I closed my eyes, overwhelmed with dread
They found him on the kitchen floor
Thirty-eight bloody stabs to the chest
A grisly crime of passion and hate
Committed one cold night, very late
Maureen claimed her innocence
Despite those damning fingerprints
And bloody clothes found in a dumpster
"Come on, I’m not a monster."
"Okay, I’ll defend you, " I agreed at last
After all, she was entitled to the best defense
The burden’s on the prosecution
So, why my hesitation?
She wasn’t telling me everything, I knew
I could see it in those weary eyes
But it wasn’t long ‘til it all came out
Cornered by the press I heard it in a shout
"Any comments? Ms. Waters.
"The headlines in the Morning News?"
"The Ice Pick Widow Strikes Again?"
The voice barely audible above the din