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Peter J. Oszmann

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· Jew Be or Not Jew Be; The Story of a Perpetual Alien

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· The Butterfly Effect (Repost) Revised

· A living, breathing abstract art…- (Satire)

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· A Bar of Chocolate… and a Smile…

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· About the Book -“Remember Us”

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· Terrorism, martyrdom: A "Jew-ish" perspective.

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· Thoughts… just thoughts… Part 2

· Once upon a time - Sonnet

· A stroll in the autumn glow - Sonnet

· Autumn Requiem

· Hallowed be Thy name…

· After sunset - Sonnet

· Why visit museums?

· Searching for your face in the clouds – Sonnet

· Ideal Man – Ideal Woman

· Tanabata - Sonnet

· A Moment On a Summer’s Day… - Sonnet

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· Magda's Daughter : A Hidden Child's Journey Home

· Author Interview at Phoenix Book Reviews.

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Books by Peter J. Oszmann
  Doctor! Doctor! Doctor!
by Peter J. Oszmann
Sunday, August 08, 2004
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Peter J. Oszmann
•  Once upon a time - Sonnet
•  A stroll in the autumn glow - Sonnet
•  Autumn Requiem
•  Hallowed be Thy name…
•  After sunset - Sonnet
           >> View all 256

(Three short verses on Doctor-Patient relationships… and one on Dentists)






A telegraph for help


The doctor was eating his roast;

The telegraph came with the post.                            

He swore and said: “Screw!”

Opened to read, ready to drop:

“Mother in law at death’s door. Stop.

Can you pull her through?”




Discretion and fashion


After the op the girl asked

The surgeon, as he unmasked:

“Will anyone see my scar?”

“Erm”, - replied the registrar -

“Depends on your discretion

And the demands of fashion.”




Tactful statistics


“Doctor what are my chances to survive?”

“Very good, indeed excellent, I’d say.

Your good chances from statistics derive

And that is definitely going your way.

One out of every ten will stay alive,

When this disease all through the body spread;

You’re the tenth I’ve seen, nine went in nose-dive

And every one of them are truly dead.”




Helpful professional


“I’d rather have a baby than this…”

The young woman to the dentist said.

“I’m willing to help you with that Miss,

I’ll tip this chair to make it a bed”…



© P. J. Oszmann (2000-2002)

©Illustration: Created in Publisher and Photoshop.




Jew Be or Not Jew Be

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Reviewed by Ed Matlack 8/18/2004
You are so crazy, and with a sense of humor, you may end up in the crazy farm with me and the rest of us at AD...Peace, eD & Rufuz
Reviewed by Leysa Lowery 8/12/2004
LOL! Loved 'em all!
Reviewed by Jane Rodway 8/11/2004
Loved the second and the last- I like your humorous side!!
Reviewed by Mitzi Jackson 8/11/2004
lol this is so funny
silly really thanks for the laughs!!
Reviewed by Amira van Kerk 8/11/2004
How sweet.
Good jokes.
Thanks for sharing.
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 8/9/2004

LOL--these are brilliant! well done! but what a powerful message--thank you

(((HUGS))) and love, karla. :)
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 8/9/2004
HiLARious, Peter, absolutely BRILLIANT! Thanks for sharing these gems! LOL You are too much, my friend! LOL BRAVO!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in America, Karen Lynn in Texas. :D
Reviewed by Gabor Renner (Reader) 8/8/2004
Dear Peter,

These poems are like an origami of words and phrases. What a technique! I also enjoyed the contents.

Jolly well done!
Reviewed by Lori Moore 8/8/2004
These are a joy.
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 8/8/2004
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