IF WOMEN HAD UDDERS...
If women had udders
And cows had breasts
Would it give me the shudders
At beauty contests?
Would I oggle the cows
Out standing in fields?
Would I grin and carouse
Mouthing bovine appeals?
And think of the bras
That would have to be made!
(But hold your applause...
My point seems to have strayed!)
If this all seems bizarre
And sounds quite unreal,
Still the thought from afar
Has a certain appeal!
But it's all a big joke,
Not to worry one bit!
Since I'd likely just choke
On that abundance of tit!
-----------------------------------------------------------
[Please note: It has belatedly come to my attention that one Stephen Cree has apparently already used the first two opening lines of this doggerel (back in 2001), so my profound appologies to Mr. Cree for having sustained a similar brain-fart (albeit after the fact). For those who wish to see Mr. Cree's poetic pontification on this subject, you can find it here: http://www.funnypoets.com/poetry/udders.htm .]
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