Donnie & Lennie 3
Chicago’s West Side
Asking the universally asked question,
“But why would a guy do that?”
“Tell me that if you know so much.
Why would a guy ever wanna do that?”
“Okay,” Donnie answered belligerently,
“I’ll tell ya if ya really wanna know!
Girls are just there!
Why do I want to think ‘bout girls
and especially ‘bout girls pissers?
Though the thought had never entered Lennie’s
mind before then.
as though the question had become
some sort of basic knowledge that was
absolutely necessary for him to gain,
absolutely necessary for him to gain immediately,
Lennie then felt an urgent need to know,
I do wanna know!
So tell me already!”
Walking to the Douglas Theatre for the Saturday matinée
crossing Twenty-first and Christiana.
Plenty’a’time to teach him…
“Okay,” Donnie said.
“When guys get boners…
You do know what a boner is,
Sure Lennie knew,
but didn’t want to admit he knew
“No,” he said.
“Lennie, are you ever dumb!
A boner’s like when you get up in the mornin’
an’ you gotta pee,
an’ ‘it’s’ like, uh, you know,”
popping his index finger upward,
Yeah, I know!”
“Well, when guys get ’em…
when they get ’em,
they ain’t been sleepin’.
An’ when they get ’em
they put ‘it’ into a girl’s,
uh, pisser and ‘jack-off’,
only then it’s called…”
by that time
Lennie had first-hand
—not pun intended—
knowledge of what ‘jack-off’ meant,
but enjoying seeing his friend become red-faced,
“What’s ‘what’ called?”
“What’s what called?”
“That, ‘that’ you said?”
“Yeah, that’s ‘that’ you said.”
was I ever that dumb?
“that’s when you, uh…”
holding his well-used index finger stiffly extended,
inserting the finger into his cupped hand,
making a pumping motion,
“uh, do it to yourself?”
like most twelve-year-old boys,
was pleasantly familiar with a “pee boner,”
and that it felt nice,
really nice, when held and
—so he’d very pleasantly discovered—
that by creating tight-handed friction
along the shaft of his pee boner he’d
been able to achieve a fantastic sensation.
—not about to admit this to Donnie—
before he could formulate the words to respond…
©December 11, 2011 / Mark M Lichterman