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Ms Beeds

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· My One and Forever Only

· Sound of Silence

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  The Introspective Musings of THP (The Happy Pig)
by Ms Beeds
Monday, September 01, 2008
Rated "PG" by the Author.

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Recent poems by Ms Beeds
•  If Love's Hindsight Were Foresight
•  My One and Forever Only
•  Men are Stupid, Women are Crazy
•  Sound of Silence
•  The Epiphany
           >> View all 44

Conflicted and confused.


The Introspective Musings of THP

I don’t understand how I arrived at this place.

I don’t understand why fate brought me here.

Hell – I don’t understand if fate was responsible –

Or if I consciously decided to surrender free will to free fall.


I don’t understand you.

I don’t understand me with you.

I definitely don’t understand the wet cat response -

I thought the wet cat was dead.


I don’t understand your continued reluctance.

I don’t understand your occasional drunken pursuit.

I don’t understand why some days I am sought –

And the following days ignored.


I don’t understand your need for unencumbered real estate.

I don’t understand moments later an intimate touch.

I don’t understand if these are just your terms/your way –

Or if you are conflicted and warring within your own mind.


I don’t understand my preoccupation with you.

I don’t understand the omissions versus the truths.

I don’t understand my need for your complete honesty –

Considering the lie I myself am living.


I don’t understand why I attempt to reach you.

I don’t understand why you push me away.

I don’t understand why the experience of 30 seconds of “didn’t suck” –

Has had such a profound affect on my life.


I don’t understand that I can’t have what I want, right now.

I don’t understand how you cannot want, some if not all.

I don’t understand where to go from here –

And whether it will be with or without you.




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Reviewed by Carin Spirit 8/21/2009
Well it sounds from your latest posts, that this is no longer a problem. You go girl, the wanton is for the taking.
Reviewed by Ed Matlack 9/3/2008
Hey, join the club, as I doubt he understands any or all of that which you don't understand either...He is just being a guy, which says very little for males in this world...I don't do any better and have been on this old world for quite a bit longer, though I try hard I still screw up...stay happy, pig...;-) Ed & Rufuz (w00f)
Reviewed by Branch Isole 9/2/2008
interestingly compelling
Reviewed by S Phillips 9/2/2008
If the poem is your truth, "Consider the lie I am living...where to go from here...with you or without you" oh God let it be without! Women are worth so much more than the abuse they endure for a moment of "joy" all the while the foundation and virtue that is them, crumbles under the torment of trying to please a man who will never be satisfied until the woman is a puppet, the drug he's addicted to vs. the drug and counsel he needs to make him whole.

If the poem is not your thruth, thank goodness.

Well-stated truth of the mental torture women endure at the hands of men/significant others who suffer from bi-polar disorder or other mental illnesses which go untreated until the law takes over when lines are crossed which can no longer be endured. The women have issues of self-worth, always looking to others for that pot of gold, the treasure of worth that's already within. So many women need to brush the dust off their mirrors to see their true reflection. Well-done!.
Reviewed by Edwin Hurdle 9/2/2008
A very well written and good poem,I enjoy reading it,take care

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