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Katy L Walsvik

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Cooking my Goose
by Katy L Walsvik

Thursday, March 30, 2006
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Katy L Walsvik
•  An Entirely Objective Self-Portrait
•  Firewalls
•  Katy for President (that would be me, ahem)
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           >> View all 493

Tie the legs together?
Fine... hand me that rope.
No, not those shoelaces
Do I look like a dope?!

Alright, now we're ready to start
Instead of a knot, I'll make a nice bow
Make the temperature real high, now
It's a small bird; I'd like it to grow.

Now, then, it says here, add stuffing
Just grab me that stuff over there.
Yes, that laundry, the small things,
Some socks and the colorful underware.

Is that word baste or does it say paste?
There's a smudge so I'll just take a guess.
Besides, it's creating that makes it gourmet
Glue down those wings, don't make a mess.

Later, MUCH later that day:

Well, what have we here, I do declare,
What happened to all his feathers and fat?
The goose is cooked, no question, I'd say,
But it now looks a bit like a charcoaled rat.

ICK!  (It isn't my fault... I read "Cooking for Dummies" cover-to-cover).  Harrumph! (grin)






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Reviewed by Ronald Hull 4/4/2006
Your cooking poems are smokin', especially when stuffed with underwear.

Reviewed by Tami Ryan 4/1/2006
Yay! Yay! Yay! Katy's back! Yippeeeeeeeeeee! It's SO good to see you again... you sure have been missed 'round these parts, my friend. Hey, stick around, wouldya? (Geesh, I have room to talk.)

Reviewed by Regis Auffray 3/31/2006
It is wonderful to read you again, Katy! Like Ed (below), I'm not cook. I've never used my stove (or oven). If I can't have a meal ready in five minutes, it ain't gonna happen. Love that microwave. Thank you for sharing your wit and humor. Love and peace to you,

Reviewed by Kate Burnside 3/31/2006
YOU'RE BACK!!!! And I am, too!!!! Never mind all the catch-up stuff we've missed out on, just one word of review from you and it's like you've never bin away, though BIN MISSED LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW, young lady... as for your... um... recipes... well, have to say they've rather bin banned in our household, but there's just no accounting for taste, I afraid... some people wouldn't have a taste for our humour even if it were handed to them on a plate... or perhaps BECAUSE it is handed to them on a plate. But, as for me! I'M HAPPY!!! Welcome back, old girl, and why don't you have a go at me old Gander as well, while you're at it... he's a bit of an old stuffed shirt anyway!! (JUST JOKIN!!!!) :)))) LOL Kate Burnseverythininsight xx PS Got any special "Under-Kilt" Recipes up your sleeve?? THAT made me choke on my Muesli smornin!!
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 3/30/2006
Sounds like a book I need to read!!

I need to deep fry a two legged pig!!

Good to read you again!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by Ed Matlack 3/30/2006
I don't cook unless I use the microwave and the food is frozen from the this food sounds pretty good to me, except maybe for the underware part, maybe you could delete that from your goose, though the paste sounds pretty damn good...Ed
Reviewed by jude forese 3/30/2006
"cooking for dummies?" hmmm ... only a dummy would eat it ;) good to read you humor again, Katy ...
Reviewed by A PAX 3/30/2006
Reviewed by E T Waldron 3/30/2006
OMG if it isn't Walsvik the Witty delighting us with her presence and delicious humor(her food certainly isn't);-) heeheehee...Welcome back ms Katy it is a pleasure to see you and thanks for the visit to my den, always a joy! please try another cook-book;-)!!!

Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader) 3/30/2006
Sometimes those "Doing Whatever For Dummies" are instead pure and simple gobbledygook in the guise of "talking down" to us . . . er . . . dummies. Well, on second thought, maybe they are good for something. You can roast marshmallows over the fire as the are a-burning. Good to see your smiling face.
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 3/30/2006
So nice to see the Viking Queen back where she belongs! Welcome back, Kate! You have been missed! Cute write; you haven't lost your sense of humor! Good on you!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :D
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 3/30/2006

My favorite Viking is back, and hasn't lost her funny bone. :) Enjoyed this one--were you looking over my shoulder? I don't cook so good. LOL

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.

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