PMS and the missing Dove Bar
Pre-Parturient pains gave birth
to a woman that I did not know
Who occupied my couch as
her territory
This woman with unwashed hair
matted to her head
with a haphazard pony-tail
who renounced the theory
Cleanliness is next to Godliness
And chose to wear the same sweats
she has worn since Monday
greasy and chocolate stained
like her mouth
Her socks stretched over her toes
as if her feet had shrunk
Her face a before picture for Clearasil
Sweat dotting brow
teeth barred
tightly fisting Midol
She refused to watch Ren & Stimpy
and sobbed through Steel Magnolias
and Cosby re-runs
into wadded Charmin
During commercials
she threw empty Coke bottles at me
swearing like a Navy Seal
and screamed at me for
snaking
the missing Dove Bar
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