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Regis Auffray

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Limericks XXIX
by Regis Auffray

Thursday, August 11, 2011
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Regis Auffray
•  I Wish I Could Tell You...
•  Encounters: Little Red Riding Hood (and others)
•  When an Angel Leaves
•  I Sprung
•  Understanding
           >> View all 352

More limerick fun...

It's Time Again...

There once was a man who loved gold
In good times he'd been proud and bold
But hard times came along
And it was not long
Before he was left out in the cold

There's a kitty in these parts named Meow
She takes care of her mistress and how
Puss'n Boots notwithstanding
Meow's far more outstanding
She's the best in the land I'll avow

A fellow I know named Bayrock
In the church he intoned "Like a Rock"
The guys were jealous
The gals incredulous
And the pastor gave him his best frock
(And the pastor made him head of his flock)

There once was a lady named Kate
One day she was late for her date
It was on the ice
It would have been nice
If only Kate had known how to skate

A cop by the name of Adam
One day arrested a madam
When she asked him why
He was rather shy
And looked down at the macadam

There once was a lady from France
Who wanted to find true romance
She made herself pretty
Made the finest spaghetti
But sadly not a man took the chance

There once was a fellow named Mork
He lived in the city of York
He was strange in some ways
In the park he would graze
Until he'd fly off like a stork

There once was a drinker of beer
Who had a bit too much cheer
He fell off his stool
He felt like a fool
And wished he were in Zaire

There once was a lad named Patrice
Who wanted to travel to Nice
He did get to France
But by some quirk of chance
He ended up herding some geese

There once was a cool cat named Tom
He had a brother named Dom
From the back alleys
To the hills and valleys
Tom and Dom always thought of their mom

© Copyright 2011 Regis Auffray



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Reviewed by lois christensen 8/21/2014
Fired away, didn't you, it was so entertaining, and so hilarious to read these.
Reviewed by Jane Noponen Perinacci 6/17/2012
The heck of it is, I know these people! Scary, huh? Seriously, you are the cool limerick writer for sure!!

Love ya!

Reviewed by Ann Marquette 10/6/2011
Fun :-)
Reviewed by Muhammad Al Mahdi 9/2/2011
I second the King of Limericks motion! It's hilarious and captivating word play.
Reviewed by MaryGrace Patterson 8/28/2011
You are the KING, KING of Limericks ,Regis....M
Reviewed by Chip Bergeron 8/26/2011
There once was a poet named Regis,
Fond of writing lim'ricks most egregious
We'd laugh and we'd chuckle,
Our knees they would buckle
At the end of his verse so mischie'vious.

Chip Bergeron
Reviewed by Mary Lacey, Desertrat 8/24/2011

Loved it. And for my rhymes, you simply ran out of time! Corny,huh?
Reviewed by Daniel Keith 8/23/2011
Your limericks always give me a chuckle. It takes a gifted person to come up with these. Love it. May God bless you every day of your life.

Reviewed by Kimberly LaRocca 8/22/2011
This was so cool. I loved it. Thanks for visiting my page today. Kim.
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 8/21/2011
These all seem to have a very strange twist to them. But then, I only have a look at the source. ;-) You leave me wondering just what service that kitty gave to her mistress? Or why a man with gold would be left out in the cold when gold was worth so much in hard times? Or why the lady from France would make spaghetti when it's in Italian dish? Or why a guy would be named Patrice?

So many questions… So little time.

Reviewed by Elizabeth Russo 8/18/2011
There once was a man who was king
His words a huge smile they would bring
He wrote until dark
Always dead on the mark
And our hearts would be lighter than spring

I'm terrible at it, which is why YOU are King Regis of Limericks :) ~ Love and hugs, Elizabeth
Reviewed by JMS Bell 8/18/2011
Reviewed by La Belle Rouge Poetess Of The Heart 8/18/2011
These always give me a smile Regis!
Reviewed by Janet Caldwell 8/18/2011
Always the perfect showman. I LOVE your rhymes... <3
Reviewed by Jon Willey 8/17/2011
It is "cool cat Tom and his brother Dom" for my money Regis. Those guys have their heads screwed on straight. Thanks for providing me with a smile that I needed this day. I bid you love and peace my dear friend. Jon Michael
Reviewed by Kate Burnside 8/17/2011
Love these, Regis! I really feel for the poor lass in France - couldn't Patrice have given it a whirl???!!!! Surely geese are no match for the finest spaghetti?! As for my name-sake, if she is anything like me she'd have ended up with more legs flying than a whirling Black Widow, so a Nice warm beach would have been much safer! :)) You are positively HEROIC at this form, Regis! xx
Reviewed by Micki Peluso 8/16/2011
Ahh Regis,
You always sent these out on the very days I neeed a laugh most--thanks for that. Loved this but I love them all!!
all the best,


Reviewed by TONY NERONE 8/16/2011
Thank You for writing this , Regis. I always enjoy the limericks.
Reviewed by Morgan Merriweather 8/15/2011
very good, Regis!
Reviewed by D. Vegas 8/14/2011
Regis, Wild!

Reviewed by Gene Williamson 8/14/2011
Regis, thanks for putting a smile on my Sunday morning. -gene.
Reviewed by Pia Shannon 8/14/2011
good fun read
Reviewed by TeeJay khan 8/14/2011
this is an awesome limerick! keep up the good work
Reviewed by jude forese 8/13/2011
you have a great sense of humor, Regis ... enjoyed the fun ...
Reviewed by Lena Kovadlo 8/13/2011
Another limerick just for me lol. You know they are not my cup tea mainly because flow seems off and I hate when flow is off in poetry. Perhaps it is just me and the flow is fine lol. I love the picture. Wherever did you find it? You always have such great pictures to go along with your poetry...
Reviewed by Rebekah Rosie Lang 8/13/2011
Regis, I wanted to wish you a "Happy Birthday" with many more birthdays to come. Love the limericks! Have a good day today.
Love ya!
Reviewed by C. McGovern-Bowen 8/13/2011
Always the great entertainer, Regis!
Peace & Blessings,
Reviewed by Vivian Dawson 8/13/2011
~Regis~ such a whiz, entertains us with his rhyme!
from the sunshine of his mind!!

Lady Vivian
Reviewed by Clarence Prince 8/13/2011
Regis, I have to agree with (Axilea Mu) You have endless imagination. Blessings!
Reviewed by Axilea MU 8/13/2011
One thing I am sure about: you have endless imagination, which is a wonderful gift. Smiling...

Reviewed by Janna Hill 8/12/2011
Poor Patrice herding the geese... Thanks for the chuckle Regis.
Reviewed by Sheila Roy 8/12/2011
Smiling:) Love the pic, too, Regis. Hugs,
Reviewed by Paul Berube 8/12/2011
Great one, Regis.
Reviewed by Ed Matlack 8/12/2011
I always get a laugh or at the very least a smile, so you never fail miserably...e
Reviewed by Inspire Hope 8/12/2011
I needed to!!!! Thank you Regis for sharing your beautiful gift ! May Abba Father bless and frant to you His
continual favour upon your life !

Much Love,
Reviewed by Richard King 8/12/2011
A smorgasbord if ever there was one and I love smorgasbords. Thanks fee, Dick
Reviewed by Joy Hale 8/12/2011
Always a treat to read your poems! This offering is delightful, almost as delightful as you are! Joy L. Hale
Reviewed by Sherry Heim 8/12/2011
Always a few chuckles to be found by a visit to your Den, Reg. That is a great picture, by the it you??? j/k
Take care,
Reviewed by Christine Alwin 8/12/2011
wtg Reg, you are a pro at these, they are fun! :)
Reviewed by Lonnie Hicks 8/12/2011
Laughed out loud. Funny stuff.
Reviewed by baz busbe 8/12/2011
Made me smile, God bless. Baz
Reviewed by Annabel Sheila 8/12/2011
Giggle....thanks for the laughter this afternoon, Regis! You always evoke smiles with your witty rhymes!

Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader) 8/12/2011
You're the master at these, big time.
Reviewed by Laura Fall 8/12/2011
Wonderfully written poetry indeed Laura
Reviewed by Christine Tsen 8/12/2011
You do know how to make one smile, Regis!
Thank you for that ~
Reviewed by Liana Margiva 8/12/2011
VERY NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Liana Margiva
Reviewed by neerja gandhi 8/11/2011
great fun... Enjoyed all... :)best wishes..neerja
Reviewed by Glen Manese 8/11/2011
Regis, thanks for the readings... At first, I'm reading along and said this does not make sense... Realized that after a few reads that this is a mosaic of verses... hehehe...
Reviewed by Michelle Mead 8/11/2011
:) Great as always, Reg! I love the cat one best :) xx Love and blessings, Michelle

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