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Micha Julian

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Member Since: Sep, 2002

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Confessions of an Unstrung Mind
by Micha Julian
Rated "R" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Micha Julian
•  And Hope?
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           >> View all 145

"she's come undone..."?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




Undefined, illogical confusion, smoky
Funhouse Mirror-ed illusion-- this confusion.
Con  Fusion?     Wait, that's it!
I've conned the fusion, fused the cons,
though I seem to have misplaced the pros.
Damn! Perhaps I should begin again.
No! I can't. No, not again!
My hands are tied.
My tears all cried, dry
and glutted, swollen
inside my quite sore throat.
And my heart?
My heart, I've swallowed whole.
This is absurd.
Yes, absurd, still I go on-- absurdly on
and on and on and on.
All barriers broken, nothing sensible spoken
and I'm...   I'm rhyming!   Why?
There is no rhyme to this?
And certainly no reason.
Oh, now cliches?
Perhaps it's true , at times they fit.
Fit?  I seem to feel one coming on.

All reason, rhyme and normalcy
(whatever that may be?) gone again!
Why? How? Where? What?
And Who Am I?
Lost and rambling everywhere,
anywhere, why?
Here and there she goes
and goes and ends up lost, again.
Nowhere! No boundaries in sight.
No order neatly tied up nicely,
tightly, pretty, rightly. No!
You see?
Damn! I've gone on too long, again.
And feel I'm about to (forgive me!) run
and stick my head in the oven.
Have it done and over.
Done!
Turn on the gas and...
No, I can't, it's electric, the oven.
Yes, electric.
As am I at this moment.
And such moments come too often.
Still!
I wouldn't! Even if the oven
wasn't electric.
I would not, no!

I am no Plath (damned gas!),
no Hemingway (that blasted gun!)
Nor am I really anyone.
I am not! Not any one
of all too many gone.
And all I share with them is
  I know why!
In my own way, as perhaps others do?  You?
I know what it is to feel that need to...
I know that inside anyone, undone,
unstrung hems wreak havoc!

And I swear I'd prefer not
to be saying any of this at all,
as I do have some pride, you see?
Whatever may be left of it,
when all of this is said and done.

I, simply, upon occasion, cannot see
my own boundaries, along the borderline
of what is and was... I suppose,
meant to be.


   



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Reviewed by Regis Auffray 3/19/2006
"She's come undone..." Reminds me of the "Guess Who." Nicely composed and shared, Micha. Thank you. Respectfully with love and peace,

Regis
Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor (Reader) 10/20/2005
This is lovely work, Micha. I've missed reading you.
Reviewed by richard poor 8/3/2004
everything is meant to be and it shows in your works!
to be "unstrung" is truly a gift!
wmh
meechi
wmh
richard
Reviewed by jude forese 3/25/2004
sounds very coherent to me ...
Reviewed by E T Waldron 3/25/2004
Micha this outstanding write shows one reason for to the
dilemma, you depict so well. All artistic minds
have a super sensitive nature, some more than others
according to other genetic and environmental factors.
Many writers suffer from,depression, bi polar, and other
mania, some of which are very serious. Mostly we who write
often on poetry sites etc and have other professions etc
have it less intense and to varying degrees. It seems the
best thing is to keep writing, and to make it a point to
learn ways to chanel this energy into other areas that will
benefit us. I do meditation which is a curative method if you
work at achieving silence, you can gain control of most situations.
This is just a thought, and I hope you aren't offended. You are a gifted writer with an exquisite touch.
Reviewed by Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie 3/25/2004
Micha, this was outstanding, I loved this, you have expressed this feeling so well, I loved this:

I, simply, upon occasion, cannot see
my own boundaries, along the borderline
of what is and was... I suppose,
meant to be.


Reindeer
Reviewed by Floria Kelderhouse (Reader) 3/25/2004
Micha...I kind of felt like Anna here...
I was going to suggest making a nice cup of hot
tea...and just putting your feet up...but I do
realize all these words are running through your
head and they have to come out...maybe a tape
recorder would work...I can feel the anxiousness
in this electric write....take care...floria
Reviewed by Anna Marie Fritz (Reader) 3/25/2004
Wah! Micha...
I loved this and it is going in my library.
This is an apt description of a Bi-polar personality at the peak
of its anguish.
Take a look at my articles on this, and you'll see what I mean.

You are a clever poet!

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