|Reviewed by Z McClure
|Potent.Your use of repetition and comparison all come together to create a very visual and palpable sense of alzheimers. I've taken care of a man with this and you take us right into these two people.
That last line really hit me hard- "His heart is now her tomb".
Superb write Jerelyn
|Reviewed by Annabel Sheila
|Great work Jerelyn. You have captured the essence of Altzheimer's Diseast. My mother-in-law suffers from dementia. She's 91 years old now, and most days she doesn't know which year she's living in. Sad to watch this happen, because we are so helpless to do anything about it.
|Reviewed by Dark Knight
|I was about to leave the den for the night and was struck by this poem and I am glad I read it-very powerful writing!!!|
|Reviewed by Rafika Anderson
|The treachery and tragedy of this insidious disease is so aptly captured within your vibrant verse. Bravo.|
|Reviewed by Ed J.
|Excellent work, the preoccupation of the mind in he face of emotional devastation was well related.
|Reviewed by Axilea MU
|A very empathic poem describing repeated gestures that lost all meaning,
this death before death. In your words, a whole world
- painful, absurd - appears.
I love the lines: "Elliot watched,
his heart in his boots.
Obsessed by this woman he called Home."
Beautifully completed by: "His heart was now her tomb."
I'm glad I read this poem.
|Reviewed by Chuck Keller
|Wow! I've never heard or seen the horror of altzheimer's described better. Saddening and maddening! Brilliant minds gone before the body follows. Tragedy beyond comprehension.|
|Reviewed by Rose Loya
|written so well, thank you for writing it,
|Reviewed by Cynth'ya firstname.lastname@example.org
|Deeply personal. No one understands until they've "been there"
blessin's Sis Jerelyn,
cynth'ya lewis reed
|Reviewed by Simon Barreiros
|Fine writing Ms. Crayden. The final transition is truly the most challenging for the one leaving and for the loved ones. Like the way the meter and thoughts flit and bang around like a trapped dazed hummingbird, like thoughts of an Alzheimers patient.
All the best,
|Reviewed by Art Sun
|Sad...very sad view of this disease that is a reality for so many....sad....very sad...
|Reviewed by Dawn Mullan
|Sobering reality of this degenerative disease beautifully written with respect and eloquence. Thank you, DL Mullan|
|Reviewed by Kimmy Van Kooten
|Irreplaceable You...a Masterpiece of a write!!!
A very trying experience to watch a loved one succumb to such a disease...Your last line brought this to a new light, knowing Elliot was there, and always will be...
Glad to meet you Jerelyn! :)
Love and Peace~
|Reviewed by Joyce Bowling
|Oh my gosh! This is a stunning write my friend and very powerful indeed. Makes me think of a dear friend who is suffering from the same illness...such a sad disease but such a beautiful write. I loved the last beautiful and powerful line...his heart was now her tomb....can't describe how powerful this line is...your a beautiful poet.
|Reviewed by Regis Auffray
|Deeply compelling and moving, Jerelyn. Thank you for sharing this gift. Love and peace to you,
|Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader)
|The repetition really brings this to life, my grand mum in-law died of
Very intelligently written on such a difficult subject...
|Reviewed by Michelle Close Mills
|Oh my God. This touched me to my depths Jerelyn. My Grandmother died of Alzheimer's and we all felt as this poor husband did...as though we lost her by inches until she was already dead in every way that mattered. Gracious, this was an amazing piece. Bless you. Michelle|
|Reviewed by Gwendolyn Thomas Gath
Yes although tragic to a degree this write is,
it sadly is true at times. Hopefully, the one's
that suffer have at least led a fulfilling life.
Your words were well constructed and executed, a true
depiction nonetheless! The imagery knitted throughout
was also superb!
Thank you for sharing this onset through your poetry, quite unique, I think!
From the Heart of an Artist Quiet Storm
|Reviewed by Brett Moore
|Deeply sad and hard hitting poem, Jerelyn. "His heart was now her tomb" is an incredible conclusion. I love how you use repetition in this. Another great poem from you.
|Reviewed by D. Byron Patterson
|Lovely, Jerelyn. Just tragic and lovely. Bless you for this one. --DB|
|Reviewed by Tactfully Naive
|A very touching and intricately woven poem on a very sensitive subject.
My mother is very sinile and is prone to repeating her words and occasionally screams. So sad a state to find once proud, intelligent and energetic people. As Elliot experienced, nothing is returned in dialogue.
his heart in his boots.
Obsessed by this woman he called Home.
So quickly she had become half her size.
Soon she would be gone.
Tears flanked Elliotís chest
where two red roses bloomed.
Merle was already gone.
His heart was now her tomb.
Delicate metaphors that reek of a soul aching desperately for a love no longer able to be returned.