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  Home > Humor > Poetry
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     
Ian R Thorpe
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Books
• The Best Of Boggart Blog (vol 1)

• Dimensions of Mystery

• A Two Faced Poet

• Millennium Dawn (anthology)

• A Stroke of Luck


Short Stories
• Psycho Benefit Fraud

• The Vegetarian Shoemaker Of Barking

• Garry Trotter and the Portal of Pleasure #7

• Garry Trotter and the Portal of Pleasure #3 (Adult Humour)

• The King of the Ribble Delta Blues Singers (humour)

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 19

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 18

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 17

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 16

• A Stroke of Luck - Chapter 15


Articles
• Shocking Revelation: michael Jackson and barack Obama The Same Person

• A Career In Substance Abuse? Sounds Just The Job For Me.

• G20: World Leaders Kick Off A Witch Hunt

• Girls Alone (News From The Girls School

• Italian Vampire's Grave Discovered

• Stone Throwing Chimp Shocks Scientists

• Women In Labout (not pregnancy but political satire)

• V2G: Technology You Can't Believe In.

• Scientists Have Doubts About Doomsday Machine

• The flame still Burns Tribute to Robert Burns)


Poetry
• Doctor, Doctor

• Jack (a horrible Halloween poem)

• Tribute To A Prodigious Liver (Keith Floyd)

• Kiss and Sell

• Where Did All The Money Go

• Ode to Politicians

• The New Poet Laureate

• From The Darkness : Vernal Equinox

• Danny Boyle: A Song For Oscar

• Graduation Blues

         More poetry...
News
• Poetry Life and Times Interviews Janet Caldwell

• Ian Thorpe on Christian Radio. Unbelieveable

• Season's Greetings

• July Poetry Life and Times

• Poetry Life and Times

• Ian's Audio online at last (specially for halloween)

• Multi - Media and poetry - the future

Ian R Thorpe, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

Recent poems by Ian R Thorpe
Pooh Sticks
The Dinner Plates of Old England (humour)
Afghan Woman
Western Monkeys (political protest)
The Offcomer
Who Stole The Stars
Doctor, Doctor
Tommy Clod
Peccavimus
Feel The Burn
Pastor Penney
THEM (poem noir)
           >> View all 151
Valentine's Day Limericks
by Ian R Thorpe
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Not rated by the Author.

Share   Print   Save Become a Fan

Just for fun


(Love looks not with eyes but with the mind: - William Shakespeare_

There was an Italian waiter
who dated a girl named Ruth Slater,
They did something that night,
it must have been right,
they’re still doing it twenty years later

There was a young man named Steve
who wore his heart on his sleeve;
he fell in love with a tranny*
a whore, someone’s granny
and married his cat we believe.

* tranny: transvestite or transexual

 

The effects of inernet dating
can turn out to be quite devastating,
your date’s obsessive neurosis
and acute halitosis
quickly kill any prospect of mating

A lady who was sophisticated
found Valentine’s Day overrated
when she discovered her lover
was slow to recover.
The love affair was soon truncated.

In these troubled times with the economic meltdown and the threat of climate change casting their twin shadows over us all you might be looking for a reasonably priced, environmentally friendly gift. To learn more about Ethical Knickers for your Valentine follow the link below.

 

 


Boggart Blog - Ethical Knickers for a Valentine


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Reviewed by Janet Caldwell (author) 3/16/2008
This made me laugh. Love, Joy & Peace to you my sweet.

Janet xoxoxo
Reviewed by Jackie (Micke) Jinks 3/7/2008
Very good, all! And I DO love limericks...

You need to be writing some for St. Paddy's Day, methinks.

Micke Jinks
Reviewed by R.D. Pounds 2/24/2008
:))))

thanks, Ian

Gina
Reviewed by Vesna TwinFlameunion 2/15/2008
bloody fantastic..LOL LOL LOL !!!!!
Enjoyed this so much ..wow..needed the chuckle..Thanks!

Vesna :)
Reviewed by Kathy Armijo 2/14/2008
Thank you for the chuckles. I've always loved limericks, but could never do them justice. You do them superbly!

Happpy Valentine's Day! Kathy


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