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Early Access to Automated External Defibrillators
by Craig Hartpence

This manual is a step-by-step guide to establishing a Public Access Defibrillation System in a Business, Church, or any event where people gather. This new technology is ..  
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Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Recent poems by DINO SIMONETTI
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  John pulls up in front of the gym as Jodi is leaving.  He calls out,


“Whoa--what happened to your face?”

“Long story I’ll--!”

“Hey, I got all day--tell me!”

 John stares at her,

“Okay, get in--we can take a ride and--!”

“Behave yourself John!”

“Oh really?  Behave?”

“Can you?”

“Jodi, I got male slut written all over me!”

“Well in that case--!”

“That’s my girl!”

She gets in. 

“John, that looks like it hurts so bad--!”

 Jodi gently runs her hand over John’s groin,

“Know what John--I bet I know exactly what you need to take your mind off the pain--!”

“Oh really?”


 Before John can utter another word, Jodi nearly rips his pants open and dives headlong onto it;  she engulfs it entirely.


 She releases him,   

“Trust me John, you won’t be feeling any pain in a minute!  Take us someplace where I can really play nurse on you!”

“Ipswich--here we come!”

 She releases him long enough to say,

“Yee-haw!  Sand dunes and sucking--my fav!”

 John steps on the gas harder and within minutes they arrive at the Ipswich River Preserve.  He drives deep into the compound and parks behind a bush.

“Why the hell did you come here?  Dude someone might shoot us thinking we’re ducks!”

“The season don’t start for two weeks!” 

“Grab a blanket;  Nurse-Jodi has your medicine!”

“Nurse Jodi?”

“Yup--and this is John’s thermometer!  Wanna take my temperature?”

 He smiles and undulates his brow,

“I’d love to take your temp--open wide!”

“Sit on the hood so I can get a better reading!”

 John slides up onto the hood, Jodi opens her mouth and descends slowly onto it. After several minutes of feverish bobbling, she stops--just long enough to take off her pants,

“So how’s the thermometer?”

“Almost ready!”

 She goes back to bobbling for a bit longer,

“John I want you to shove that thing in as far as it will go--I need a good reading!”

 John slides off the hood and picks her up, places her bare bottom on the hood, spreads her legs enough to enter her.  They fall into a rhythm within moments;  several minutes later, John’s breathing and pace pick up as he approaches critical mass. After the inevitable volcanic eruption, his breathing slows.  She whispers,

“Well John, I think the patient did quite well!”

“Ya and he actually survived the procedure!”          

They stare at each other,

“John, thanks--I needed that!”

“Anytime Jodi--I think I did too!”

“John, not that it matters, but the ground ain’t even settled and you’re--!”



“Not that it matters J--but what about--?”

“What he don’t know won’t hurt him!  John listen, I’ve been neurotic about wanting to do you since Hillarea’s party--but I could never think of a time where I could get you alone!  Maybe if I bashed your face back then I could’ve--!”

“And Bill--!”

“John, what do you think of threesomes?”

“Never gave it much thought--why?”

“Me, you and Bill--I could see you two doing some serious damage--wanna think about it?”

“You’re crazy!”

“Crazy?  Ah but a few more times and you’ll change your mind faster than--!”

 He peers into her eyes, searchingly while pulling up his pants,

“You feelin’ okay dude?”

“Jodi, this can’t--it won’t--ever happen again!”

“Really?  Why?”

 Jodi slides off the hood and dresses hastily; keeping her eyes locked with his,

“What’s up John?  Did I get you thinking about her?  My bad--especially after--you know--checking your temp!”

“Jodi do you have any idea what a selfish piece of shit you are? I have all kinds of words in my head that would fit--but I’ll be a gentleman and just call you a selfish piece of shit!”


“I’ll just cut to the chase!  Tell me why I shouldn’t fuck you up!”

“What are you--?”

“I got these cuts from that cop Roy when he smashed my head against the partition in the cop car--over and over--!”

“--talking about?”

“He thought I killed her--!”


“--and mangled up her bones--!”

“Are you shittin’ me?”

“She was pregnant--he thought I killed her,  he thought I knew she was and that I did her in--!”

“She was pregnant?”

“--he was figuring her mother would make her keep it and I’d be out--!”

“She could’ve had an abortion--like anywhere--and no one would have had to know--!”

“It ain’t that simple!  I would’ve married her if--!”

“John that’s admirable and all but--!”

“Jodi can you just shut the fuck up and listen?”


“The cops think I killed her and let wolves eat the flesh off her--and they think I was the one that put her bones in the church! They think I killed her because she was pregnant and I didn’t want to be a father so they think I came up with this elaborate scheme--!”


“Ya no shit!  The cops jumped the gun and didn’t think it through!  How could I get a body and all that shit inside a church and not leave any traces at all?  Krystyne said the lab said there was no traces at all of anything--it was like an expert came in and sanitized the place!  Do I look like someone that has mad skills like that?  I work for a fucking pet store and spend all my money on my car!  I don’t know the first thing about murder and certainly nothing about sanitizing a crime scene--I don’t even watch CSI®!”

“John--I am so sorry you had to go through all this!  Really, truly, as much of a lying bitch as I can be, this time honestly I can say I’m sorry!”

“And the worst part is--!”

“What is?”

“The worst part is it’s all because you had to have your fuckin magic potion!  It took me a while to figure it out--who was responsible for all of this!  It was all you--it was all you--it was all your fault!”

“How was it my fault?”

“She told me what went down that night--how it got all creepy and shit--how everyone was scared!  It didn’t matter to you if anyone got hurt!  In the end you’re just a stupid, rotten, filthy, sociopathic whore!”

“John--I know you’re upset but do you really think I deserve your language--especially after such great sex?”

“Jodi you’re such an idiot!  You just don’t get it!  Billy would’ve fucked you silly; he didn’t need magic!”

“Well--it does make it much better--!”

“Jodi--like I said--you’re an idiot!”

“John--you--will--never plow another cooch in your life as good as mine!  Not Anne’s, not Jessica’s, not Krystyne’s--no ones!”

“Do you really think I give a rats ass who I go to bed with--now?  Really?  Magic potions, fu--kin’ magic potions!  Jodi--you’re a real piece of work!” 

 “Oh screw you! Magic potions! She could’ve said no! I didn’t hold a gun to her head and tell her to do it!  She’s got a mind of her own--!”

“Don’t twist this around and hang it on Krysy!  You conned her into it!  She’s as naïve as the day is long!”

“That’s not my fault that she’s a ditz!”

“Did you even think--no that’s a question--you didn’t think about anything!  And you know I gave it thought, something you aren’t capable of--you even got the lady at the witch shop iced!!  She ended up like a shish kebob--didn’t you hear?  Or does it even matter to you?”

“I had nothin’ to do with that witch--!”

“Jodi--it’s all tied together--it’s all part of karma!  It’s all shit you stirred up--I did research--you can’t mess with the universe and expect it to not kick your ass back!”

“John you’re as screwed up as that ditz Krys!  You really believe that shit?”

“It don’t take a rocket scientist to put the pieces together--even if it’s part bullshit!”

“No John--it’s all bullshit and I’m sorry your girlfriend died but you can’t pin this on me!  Just because the cops bashed you up doesn’t mean I had anything to do with it--anything to do with any part of it--whatsoever!”

  “Jodi--Crystal--you got her killed!  She died a horrible,fucking death!!  There was nothing left but bones--bones--BONES!  ALL THAT WAS LEFT WAS HER BONES!!!”

 John pushes Jodi squarely on the chest; she trips over a downed tree, falling to the ground.

“Come on, John you can’t be that stupid!”


“John--think about it--animals tore her apart and left only bones--duh! She disappeared remember?  She wondered into the wilderness; she probably got attacked by something with a hell of an appetite!  See?  It’s pretty obvious what happened!”

 John’s expression changes from angry to smiling,

“Ya you’re probably right! Jodi I apologize for hurting you--will you accept my apology?”


 John drops down on his knees straddling her.  He leans forward and gives her a spirited kiss.

“I hear you like make-up sex!”

“I like any kind of sex!”

 John smiles as he opens his pants; it springs out and bobs an inch from her face,

“Okay Juanita, spare me no tongue!”

 John grabs her by the hair and pulls her up until it touches her lips,

“John, you’re fucked!”

“Ya, and before I leave here you’ll be too!”

 She giggles, closes her eyes and engulfs it. John moans in unison with her bobbling.  Jodi opens her eyes to see how he’s enjoying.  John winds up and punches her on the side of the head, just below the eye.  Her head torques to the right from the blow and her face mashes into small pieces of deadfall; small twigs puncture her face and cheeks.  John sits back on his heels,

“Jodi, tell me something, what are you the most scared of right now?”

“Where do you come up with this shit?”

“Oh, I dunno--!”

 John reaches for his concealed pistol and regards it before checking and reinserting its loaded reservoir.

“John, I don’t want to sound like a wise ass, but having you with a gun sitting over me heads the list right now!”

“No you stupid bitch!  Besides that?”

“Being shot with that same gun?”

    “That’s stupid too!  Tell you what; let’s talk about how it feels to be alone!”

 John edges forward and pins her arms.  He leans in close and kisses her gently; while he is kissing, he places the barrel of the pistol against her pinned hand and pulls the trigger.  A dull crack issues, blood and sinew splatter in all directions.  Jodi raises her head to scream, John puts his hand over her mouth and holds the gun close to her mouth; he wears a teeth-gritting angry grimace on his face.  He removes his hand from her mouth and places the barrel of the pistol into her open mouth, the smell of singed flesh and a small wisp of smoke rises from where the hot barrel touches her lips.  Her cry is muffled, tears flow torrentially from her eyes. 

“Stop crying you stupid douche, that didn’t hurt!”

 He removes the pistol from her mouth; she whimpers and sobs in a hitch. Jodi begins to hyperventilate; through her breaths,

“John, oh, oh, oh, John, please stop, you’re killing me!

 John rubs the smoking barrel across her cheek, smearing the remaining blood from the barrel.  She whimpers again, through hitched sobs,

“John, please, let me go, please take me to the hospital I promise I’ll never tell anyone anything; I swear on my pitiful life!”

 John ignores her plea,

“Okay Jodi, back to the question, what scares you the most?”

“John, please!”

“Ehhhh, wrong answer!”

 He places the still hot barrel of the pistol on her other palm.  He lowers his face to hers and gives her a short kiss on her now bloody lips; when their lips part he whispers,

“You’re not going to scream this time, are you?”

 Jodi shakes her head rapidly.  John pushes the pistol down hard against her palm and lets fire another round; again muscle and tendon tissue splatter out from beneath her hand, blood gushes in spurts.  Jodi bites down on her lip and squeezes her eyes closed; she lets out a gush of air through a hitched sob.  Her head is shaking from side to side; the mask of agony on her face; tears puddle around her eyes.   

“Wow, you could almost pass for Christ; nice holes!”

 He leans in and gives her another short kiss,

“You know, you actually have nice lips!”

 Jodi shakes her head rapidly to clear the eyes of tears.

“John please--I’m begging you--please stop--I’m going to bleed to death!  You don’t want to be wanted for murder right?”

John looks into her eyes, their faces just inches apart; he murmurs,

“You suck so bad, you took my Crystal away from me; I’m gonna take some of you away, so you can feel my pain!”

 “Johnnnnn, please, I’ll do anything, anything you want!  I’ll be your slave, I’ll be your lifelong sex slave  I’ll do anything, anything and everything for you forever John!  John please, please take me to the hospital so I don’t bleed to death!”

“Slave?  Sex slave?  You think for even a second I want a slave, let alone a sex slave!  I want my Crystal back--but you can’t do that!  Not even with a magic potion--can you?  You are going to pay for every day she was missing--every day she was missing my heart ached--I prayed she was alright--I prayed!  Jodi, you should pray--you should pray that God will forgive you for causing my hurt!”

“John--I hope he forgives you--you are an evil, evil man!”

“Jodi--fuck off--really--just fuck off!”

John slides off her arms and straddles her thighs; Jodi immediately pulls her hands across her chest; blood pours from her wounds.  John pops the button at the waist of her pants and whisks the zipper opens.  He gets off his knees and stoops over her now open pants.  He fists one side and yanks; the fabric tears down to mid-thigh.  He kicks her legs apart, reaches under the tear, finds the crotch of her panties and yanks until they tear.  He dives headlong to her parted crevice and runs his tongue up and down several times to part the lips. 

“Mmmm, yummy; you taste good!”

 John raises his head and pushes the barrel of the pistol into her opening.  He sits up, turns away and squeezes the trigger.  The bullet travels through her body and exits mid shoulder taking nearly three-inches of tissue with it.  Jodi doubles up and rolls to the side, head thrown back; she’s in too much pain to muster a scream.

“Okay Jodi, you’re my sex slave now; don’t you just love being my sex slave?”

 Jodi whispers with what breath she has left.

“Uhh, uhh, ohh, uhh, I, I, John, I can’t breathe, John help me; I can’t breathe!”

  John whispers back tauntingly,

“Awww, what happened, we puncture a little lung.  Oh well, that won’t matter soon!”


 “Jodi, you caused me to almost lose my mind in worry!  So--do you--now--wanna hear the sound of someone losing your mind?”

John places the tip of the pistol against her temple.  He squeezes the trigger, a round enters her head.  Jodi’s head torques from the impact; the hollow point round instantaneously exits the other side of her head, taking a chunk of skull, hair and brain matter with it; her eyes roll up into their sockets.  Jodi’s body goes limp. 

“Wow! That was intense--wasn’t it? Now that you’ve heard yourself losing your mind; let’s see what you are thinking!”

 He places the barrel of the pistol on her forehead and squeezes off a round, the body jumps.  The top of her skull splinters and blows out, taking chunks of brain with it. 

“Well dear, this one is to shut your mouth and that lying conniving tongue that just flapped way too much!”

John puts the barrel of the pistol into what remains of her mouth and squeezes off one more round, the skull collapses, brain matter, eyes and cartilaginous matter splatter the ground immediately to the left and right of what remains of Jodi’s head. 

“Okay, let’s see, how many was that?  Oh, gee, the clip is empty; glad I brought extra!”

John pops the clip out and loads in fresh rounds, pushes the clip back in and slides the barrel back.  He circles her body as he empties the full clip of hollow point rounds into her neck and chest. The upper part of Jodi’s body, from the neck to xyphoid, disintegrates from the obliterating nature of the hollow point rounds. The remains are all but indistinguishable. John looks down at what remains of the body.

 “Nice work Johnny boy, Very original!  I would have never thought of that!  See we do nice work together!  Now put the gun away--I have plans for it.  So now Johnny-boy, should we bury her or leave her out for the scavengers and maggots to do the rest of the work?” 

 John looks down at the mangled body; he rocks his head tick-tock, as if deciding. 

“She’s a piece of shit, I’ll just cover her up with some leaves, she’ll make a good compost!”

 “Hey, it’s your call! You are original my friend! Now Johnny, here’s what I want you to do, drive home and go to the garage, take the gun apart and melt it with your torch!”

 John nods, turns away and walks to the car, gets in and drives away.  The fox trots out to the edge of the roadway and watches the car until it is out of sight.  The animal turns tail and trots back into the woods, stops at the splattered head and brain matter and eats hungrily.

“Mmmm, yummy!  Phea, you sure you won’t join me?  She tastes as good as the other one did!  Last chance; before I eat all of her!”

“Ba’Gatz!  You’re the demon, I’m the succubus, gorge yourself; but hurry, we have to finish up with John before he realizes what’s going on!”

“Yes dear! I’ll be done before you can say Hinkle! Oh how was that suck face, did you get enough?”

“Never enough! And stop calling me ‘dear’ or the next time you’re human I’ll yank your balls off!”

“Uww, aren’t we the feisty one!  Please, promise me a good time!  Can you pull them off with your mouth?”

“Ba’Gatz; fuck off!  That’s all I’m gonna say, just, fuck off; now eat your girl and let’s go!”

His infectious laughter causes her to snigger with him; Ba’Gatz finishes his gorge; only the lower body remains, devoid of its organs.

John arrives at his house, walks to his workbench to take the gun apart.  He lights his torch and heats the metal parts until they form a blob.  John picks up the cooling blob of metal with the forceps and drops it into a bucket of rusty water.  The water spatters and fumes as smoke arises from the surface.  The cooled mass is now far removed from resembling a pistol.  The silver-black ball of steel will now be a an excellent paperweight--in the shape of a fox’s head. 

In the shadows at the back of the garage, are the blazing red eyes of the fox.  It emerges from the shadow slowly and regards John as it walks past him.  John looks down at the animal and the corners of his mouth turn up in a partial smile.  The fox inhales deeply and a thin tendril of sooty smoke exits from John’s nose and mouth.  The fox looks up at John, yips once and turns tail; it exits the garage via the side door.  Moments later, John looks down at his paperweight, with a confused look on his face. 

Where did this come from?”

“John you do such nice work it’s just a little something I want to give you!”

 John shakes his head and says aloud.

“Now I’m hearing voices!”





















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Reviewed by Axilea MU 6/26/2010
Mysterious. Scary. Ah, the power of words...

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