When Alex dialed that first number and Watson answered the phone,

Bell became a phony king, so let's knock him off his throne.

He created a new industry and most certainly it was needed, but

Not everything said on the damn thing ought to be seriously heeded.

The phone rings Sunday morning, 4 A.M to be precise,

Instantaneous information! What a wonderful device!

A dash to the phone. A curse, "Bell couldn't have been dumber!"

Why didn't he also invent a way to avoid, "Sorry, wrong number!"

Then there's the valid connection containing a sales pitch,

If Bell were standing here right now?  Brother, would I bitch!

How do I keep these people out of my financial hair,

"No, I don't want a week in July in a Death Valley time share."

Now you can make a car call at 120 miles per hour,

Why would anybody do that? Does it give a sense of power?

I think I'll pass on this one; for a car phone I'm not ready,

Until I have a racing need to call a family named Andretti.

Someone's figured out a way to use telephone cable wire

To bring TV right to your home, but only under hire.

One can view reruns all day, if one's finances can carry it,

We didn't pay the first time through for shows like Ozzie & Harriet.

Pay telephones were everywhere. The coins? It

sure did eat them,

But Alex goofed, provided the means by which we could defeat him.

Who could deny the swell of power, "Alex Bell, you've made my day!"

By finding money left by someone in the money tray.

Copyright © 2012 by Frank Koerner