Recent Reviews for Karen S. email@example.com
Dragon Valley (Book) - 7/23/2005 6:01:44 AM
Very good writing. Very good as a whole. The 2nd and third paragraphs are a bit wanting and have no magic. When I read those paragraphs I started to wonder if the book was going to be lame. It neither has the magic nor the presence it should have. I got an uneasy feeling that something is not right not real. Part of it I think might be the rythm. The boy wouldn't just suddenly come to the conclusion that a babarbarian hord is raiding his village. U need fire, smoke chanting hoof beats, the sound of steel on steel. Anyone of the above will do or there are a multiple of other possibilities that would suffice. The confidence and security and rythm ssem to come a lot better after that. Though I think they are still an issue. The sentence structure could be worked on. For instance the 3rd to last paragraph its kindof an ilongated sentence that destroys the meaning and flow and impact of the good stuff you have got to say.
Its a very good book. I hope you have found my criticism constructive. i look forward to reading more of your writing.
How a Head Cold Got Me Married (Short Story) - 11/29/2005 2:50:40 PM
What a beautiful story of love. Sorry about you first husband, however, Remigio sounds like a great gift from Heaven. God Bless you twice with love..and also blessed you with an amazing talent to create and write. Excellent work throughout yout Authorsden webpages.
Beyond All Time, Beyond Even Space (Short Story) - 6/20/2004 3:32:22 PM
An interesting work. It seemed a bit too epic for a short story though. This seems like it would work better as a novelette or full-length novel. It reminds me of early "golden age" sci-fi. Good luck publishing it.