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Garrett L Diamond

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Featured Book
Oops, I Lost my Sense of Humor
by Lois Santalo

Death came for me in 2001 in the form of pancreatic cancer. Doctors advised against surgery due to my age--but I felt that even an extra year or two is worth fighting and..  
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Big Microwave Bitch
By Garrett L Diamond
Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Rated "PG13" by the Author.

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Recent stories by Garrett L Diamond
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           >> View all 5


Funny story about a crazy woman in a retail store.

I work for a big retail electronic's company. One day I was busy with a customer while from across the store. A woman yells at me as if I were done deaf.

“Can you help me?”

She was sobbing in a river of tears in the microwave oven section. Over and over again she yelled for help while crying. She was a heavy beast. This bitch was ancient. She must have been 500 pounds maybe even a ton.

“I am going to sue if I don’t get a microwave, somebody better get a lawyer, I’m packing and you will get a belly full of lead.”

She was ready to die for this fucking microwave and she didn’t care, because she was not going to get eat her Geno’s Pizza Rolls that were rapidly defrosting in her basket.

Old gray haired cunt. She stared
throwing merchandise. I got Dan the security guard.

Dan with a load voice says. “Lady stop throwing things.”

“I throw what ever I fucking want you old ass geeser.”

Dan strong-armed her. Taking her arm pressing behind her back and put a Bruce Lee Karate chop on her pushing her out on to the sidewalk, right on her big fat ass.


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Reviewed by mz kimi 3/27/2007
well, okay then! too funny, and oh the trials of retail!
Reviewed by Brett Moore 10/20/2006
Man, this is hysterical. It's one of those real situations that make mundane life seem worth living.

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The Taexali Game by Nancy Jardine

Book 1 of The Rubidium Time Travel Series...  
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RAMPAGE by Hank LeGrand

Below are the LINKS at AMAZON for my children/young adult titles. I hope you enjoy my stories as much as I did writing them. Title - Buffalo Horn US - http://www.amazo..  
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