She turns 11 tomorrow.

and she says to me:

'Do babies come really

from there? '

That finger was much too low;

not my belly

but way below

and I froze-

between the lie

and her need to know

truth.

She,

eyes wide

'do they really come

from your thingie? '

I said

'yes, but...'

She interrupted

eyes wide

'but that's too small'

I could she her measuring

a little baby

with her tiny thingie

and she asked

'how can it come out?

"It'll stretch" I said

"don't worry

people have babies every day.'

'Did you stretch? ' she said.

'Yes, I did and you came out fine.'

Her eyes darted low

trying to visualize.

'Did it hurt?'

'Well yes but you know dear

I had some drugs and it was ok.

'Like aspirin? '

'Yes, sort of like aspirin but

much stronger.'

'So is there is pain..nnn? '

She stretched the word out.

'Yes, there is

but aspirin drugs

make it so it is not so bad.'

She said

'And that's because it goes inside? '

'What? '

'The baby comes because the boy's

thingie

goes inside your thingie? '

'Goes inside? '

I said

'Yes, does the boy thingie go inside the girl's thingie?

Inside' she repeated for emphasis.

'Well yes, if they are in love. That should only happen if they

are in love and married.'

'Oh.'

'If they are not married or in love does that mean a baby won't come? '

'Well, yes a baby can come even if they are not married or in love.'

'Mom' she said her eyes really wide. It goes inside? '

'Yes, '

'Does it hurt? '

'Well at first, it does hurt but after a while it feels good.'

'After a while-"

"You mean you have to do it again so as to make it stop hurting? '

No, not exactly, I mean after a while you get used to it and it doesn't hurt.'

'What does it feel like? '

Huh? Feel like?

'Feel like, you know, feel like.'

'Oh, ' I said 'that is very private.

Only you and your husband should know

what it feels like but I can tell you it is very special.

A very special feeling

unlike any thing in the world.'

'Anything in the world? '

Yes, very special. It is God's way of making a baby and you know how

special babies are.'

She nodded.

And so my daughter learned from me

what her biology was telling her,

what those feelings inside meant

and I pray she has her special day,

her special tomorrow

with something special

that she will recall from me.