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As The Washer Turns
By Sandra Lee Novelly
Wednesday, February 19, 2003
What happens when an appliance rebels...
Man, I am so tired of this - twisting and turning, spinning and rinsing. Does anyone ever stop to ask me if I want to be stuffed with smelly socks and underwear with skid marks? NO!
It’s the same thing - day after day, week after week. I get dirty clothes stuffed into my belly, I have to fill up with water and dissolve that darn pasty detergent or spread that liquid stuff and then twist and turn, twist and turn, over and over and over again. Then I have to spin and spin and spin and get all the water out. But it’s still not over for me! I have to fill up again and get some more liquid stuff dumped in on the wet clothes and then twist and turn and twist and turn to rinse the doggone detergent out of the clothes and get the other liquid stuff worked through them. (I should be skinny as a cotton-picken’ rail by now.) Then I have to spin and spin and spin and get the water out again! Whew! I get dizzy just thinkin’ about it.
Half the time they overload me and I try to tell ‘em by making disagreeable noises. But mostly they ignore it and it breaks me down. Then they wanna blame me! What’s up with that! If that pasty detergent doesn’t rinse out properly, they blame me. Huhhh! It’s because the dodos put too many of their nasty smelly clothes in my belly. Whadda they think I am? I can only hold so much!
Ya know, I think I’ll go on strike. Yeah, that’s it! I’m on strike. I’ll show ‘em!
Here we go…they’re putting their dirty duds in my belly again. I’ll let ‘em think all is well. Ok, they’ve filled me up - more than filled me up, as usual! Here comes the water. Chugga, chugga, chugga. I’m twistin’ and turnin’. Ok, they’re gone now. I QUIT!
“Honey, the washer quit in the middle of the wash cycle.”
“Well, try pushing in the dial and pulling it out again.”
“Ok, let me take a look.”
He’s unplugging my cord and plugging it in again. Hehehe. I’ll start back up until he goes away. Chugga, chugga, chugga.
“Seems to be okay now, Sweetie.”
Gone again. I QUIT!
“Honieeeee. I thought you said the washer was OK…”
“It was working when I was there a minute ago. Try unplugging it and then plugging it back in…”
“Ok Hon. Oh there it goes.”
Chugga, chugga, chugga. Toddle on now Sweetie-pie. That’s a good girl!
Darn this thing! “Hon, this washer quit again. What’s wrong with it!”
Just tired, ma’am. Just tired. Dontcha’ ever get tired….?
“I guess we’ll have to call the repairman, Sweetie.”
“I don’t understand it ma’am. There doesn’t appear to be anything malfunctioning. I’ve checked the cord, the machine, the drum. Everything. It works fine for me. The only thing I can suggest is changing out the computer unit if the machine continues to malfunction, and that is quite costly.”
“Hmmm. I see. Well, I’ll see if it works now and if not…maybe we’ll just have to get a new one and throw this one in the rubbish heap.”
Rubbish heap…that doesn’t sound good. Although it might be restful. But…I’d probably get rusty and birds would use me for a bathroom and it’s cold and wet out there.
Chugga, chugga, chugga…
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|Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
|life as seen through the eyes of a washing machine. very interesting perspective, makes for a very unique and readable story! love the element of humor, too! well done, sandra! :) (((HUGS)))|